XSUCKS
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File:XSUCK's header.png | |
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In case you were wondering, that's a shrink ray | |
Residence | XSUCK's Fortress |
Gender | Male |
Other names | Sucker |
Occupation | Villain |
Years active | 2011-present |
Employer | Nightmare |
Notable works | Making XSUCK's Fortress, stealing stuff |
Salary | 1 fish a day |
Weight | 14.8 lbs |
Known for | His crazy world domination plans, his shrink ray, squid launcher and puffle gun |
Title | X Antibody |
Opponent(s) | Good guys, villains who disapprove of his crazy plans |
Relatives | XTUX Hun (XSUCKS is his X antibody) |
Call-sign | Vector |
Signature |
XSUCKS Victor Toot, or XSUCKS for short is the villainous upstart X antibody of XTUX Hun that resides in the spanking new XSUCK's Fortress, Nightmare Crater. A member of Nightmare's Army, XSUCKS is quite pathetic despite his intellegence, and his evil plans for the furthering of Nightmare's cause rarely turn out properly thanks to his clumsiness and ego getting in the way. While not a major threat to the United States of Antartica, XSUCKS is nonetheless extremely dangerous in one-on-one combat, as his shrink ray is super effective.
Background
Creation
After XTUX Hun was killed during Traveling All of Antarctica, the Snoss authorities confiscated his body and proceeded to perform expirements on it, one of which was injecting him with an unfinished Snoss varient of the X Virus. The varient was supposed to spew out an antibody faster then the normal version, but it was not able to activate until XTUX was reanimated by the clumsy Rookie during EPF Agents Dave and Clovis. Upon awakining, XTUX grew a purple X on his forehead while the virus developed an antibody, and during it's development XTUX was greatly weakened. But in chapter 12 of The Absurd Mission, XTUX managed to cough the antibody in-flight, which caused XTUX to crash into a tree and damage himself, while the antibody ran off cackling.
Joining Nightmare's Army
The antibody ran through the day and entire night, and at 12:00 AM, he collappsed of exaustion. In his dream, he was walking through a dark and dreary forest when suddenly, he heard a voice.
"My child? My child? Where are you?"
The antibod turned and saw a wraith floating towards him, and he shivered.
"That is SO LAME. If you wanna come over to me, then waddle!" shot back the antibody, and the wraith frowned.
She clearly did not expect him to be this rude, and expected respect.
"My child. Don't talk to me like that. I am your mother."
"If you're my so-called mother, then tell me my name." replied the antibody with a disrespectful air, and the wraith frowned.
"You have forgotten that you have no name. Only I can name you."
"Then what do you wanna name me, freak? And if you want me to stop calling you that, what's your name?"
The wraith growled, then said "Fine. I'm Nightmare, and since you were so rude, I name you XSUCKS"
The newly named XSUCKS just stood there silently, stunned that he'd been given such an awful name.
"Fine, "Nightmare". At least you didn't name me "Sue"! OH YEAH!!!!"
"Ugh. I was just about to rename you that. Look, I'll blow you up unless you join my army, OK?" grumbled Nightmare, who was fed up.
XSUCKS did not want to be blown up, so he nodded yes. Then, Nightmare dissappeared and the dream ended
Once XSUCKS awoke, he started to head towards Nightmare Crater, where he joined Nightmare's Army.
Beginning of Career and Building XSUCK's Fortress
Once he arrived at Nightmare Crater, he was classified as a "Lesser Evil Creature" and given a medocure amount of cash. Furious at Nightmare's lack of kindness towards him (and clueless that this was revenge for his treatment of her), he vowed that he'd show her who was better, and he decided to rob a bank in order to get enough funds to build a house.He was (barely) sucessful, and after getting enough to build a house he realized that he didn't only want a house, nor a mansion. He wanted a fortress! XSUCKS began to make a living robbing rich penguins and banks, and after a few weeks of this he was ready. Construction of his fortress took a few months, and after this, XSUCKS had all that would satisfy a normal penguin. But not XSUCKS.
Theft of Shrink Ray
Jealous of XTUX Hun's built in weaponry, and wanting to do better, XSUCKS jumped at the chance when he found out that a shrink ray was being tested at a base on a top secret island, and he decided that he'd steal it for himself. After building a rather cool flying machine (wasting yet more of Nightmare's funds), he flew out to the island, broke into the base, grabbed the shrink ray and fled. Upon arriving home he demanded that Nightmare's private surgeons perform a costly operation on him that would disguise the shrink ray as a shotgun and embedd it in his arm. When they and Nightmare refused, Nightmare bribed the doctors with cold, hard cash, embezelled from Nightmare's own bank account! They agreed and performed the operation on him, and when they were done, Nightmare found out. She was furious at XSUCKS and proceeded to kick his spoiled bottom until it turned purple.
Personality
XSUCKS is rude and disrespectful to all the he meets, no matter how important or powerful they may be. Many say that even though those may be ad, his main weakness is his ego. XSUCKS thinks far too highly of himself and far to lowly of others, and his claims of being "coolest villain ever" often annoy even mid mannered penguins to the point of them giving him a well-deserved knuckle sandwhich. Being extremely wealthy only worsens the situation, and a popular doctor's joke claims that his ego will grow so big that it will surpass Swiss Ninja's and will have to be surgically extracted from his brain.
Involvement
XSUCKS works for Nightmare in Her Army as a lowly lesser minion, but in reality is more independent then the other X antibodies. He rarely follows Nightmare's orders and frequently gets in her way, and often she considers ending his pathetic life once and for all. XSUCKS mainly spends his time trying to steal (and often failing) valuable treasures and cultural artifacts, when he is not lazing around in his fortress, playing his Vii. Amoung Nightmare's Army and other villains he is viewed with disdain, his antics are considered laughable by many.
Weapons of Choice
- Shrink Ray:A ray gun that shrinks objects. Disguised as a shotgun and built into XSUCK's arm, this is XSUCK's favourite weapon.
- Squid Launcher:This odd device has many uses, such as a grappling hook, weapon and pranking device. XSUCKS invented it himself and is one of his more sucessful inventions
- Puffle Gun:Basically a gun that fires puffles. Rather useless, this gun is a favourite of puffles as it is extremely fun to be shot out of, and many puffles that he meets beg to become his Puffle Gun's live ammo.
Quotes
- "SQUID LAUNCHER! OH YEAH!!!!!!"
- "I'm committing crimes with both Direction and Magnitude! OH YEAH!!!!"
- "Face my PUFFLE GUN!"
- "OH YEAH!!!"
- (after realizing that he is in a dire situation) "Oh poop."
- "AAAGGGHHHH!!! CURSE YOU TINY TOILET!"
Trivia
- XSUCKS is unable to write, despite his intelligence.
- For some reason, he is obsessed with Waffles.
- He is a parody of Vector from Despicable Me.
- XSUCKS seems to be in the habit of following up everything he says with "OH YEAH!".
- Not surprisingly, the EPF does not consider him a threat.
See Also