Rockefella Aurumen
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| Rockefella Olej Aurumen | |
|---|---|
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[[|250px]] Oil, that is. Black gold. Texas' tea. | |
| Profile | |
| Gender | Male |
| Race | Dorkugese penguin |
| Faction |
Midas' Great-uncle; The brother of Midas' grandfather. |
| Health | Deceased |
| Level | Oil tycoon |
| Status | Deceased |
| Location | Buried outside of Redlink Abbey |
| Parody of | John D. Rockefeller, Standard Oil monopolies |
| Occupation | Oil tycoon |
| Interests | Shady business tactics, monopoly, oil |
| Friends | No one |
| Enemies | Candia Sermunculli, Ministry of the Oversight of Monopolies (M.O.M.) |
| Archetype | Villain |
Rockefella Aurumen is the great-uncle of Midas Aurumen. He is famous for his endless attempts to drill in the environmentally sensitive areas of Lichenblossom, and next door to Redlink Abbey. His oil company held a true monopoly over all things black gold, but Candia Sermunculli, the island's Assistant Attorney General, could never successfully bust him.
Background
Rockefella Aurumen hatched in what we now call the USA, then Olde Antarctica, on May 15th, 1941. His family moved to Lichenblossom because they were too nerdy to fit into the general populace. As immigrants, they were not subject to the Squashin enslavement of the natives. According to historical records, Rockefella developed a fascination with oil when he first watched his father pump gasolene into his car's fuel tank. He asked where oil came from, and the story that followed inspired him.
Rockefella's climb into industry was a facianting one indeed. Not unlike his descendents, Rockefella always had too much free time and too much ingenuity. He became famous for walking into banks as young as thirteen and purchasing stock.
His first job was at a Squashin oil well near Razzamatizido. As an immigrant, he couldn't work in slave labor, so he was put into an administration position. His incredible work effiency, inunitive tactics, and streamlining of the company gave him a promotion and promotion. He became close friends with the cronies that ruled the island. He really lacked feelings either way to the slave labor. He acknowledged that it was immoral, but felt it was "just business". Had he actually seen the conditions, he may have thought differently.
Throughout his day job, Rockefella collected stock certificates in the various Squashin industries. He stored his wealth away and was extremely frugal (a super tightwad). He climbed in the ranks and made a good salary, which he stored away in a jar reading "BIG DREAM FUND".
When the Squashins were violently couped from power during the famous Fort Kosher raid of 1972, the oppressors fled for their lives and lost their fortunes. Rockefella, who stored his money in multiple bank accounts back in the USA, lost nothing. He chose to give the Squashins money to survive in exchange for their stake and stock in oil. This simple trading was effective. Rockefella had seized power from all major Squashin oil firms in Lichenblossom, and he used this power to take stakes in the USA, too.
Rockefella founded his company, Danville Oil, in 1974, at the young age of thirty three. He was well aware that this could be viewed as a monopoly (he held 77% of all oil at the time and 98% of all Lichenblossomese oil), so he split Danville Oil into various little companies such as Phineas Oil, Ferb Oil, and Lydna Oill, with Danville Oil being the top. The so-called "CEOs" of the various many companies in fact answered to the board at Danville, and, ultimately, to Rockefella alone.
In essence, Daville Oil was a corporation of corporations, a business trust. The "CEOs" of, say, Phineas Oil, worked like a normal business, running independently, but with ties to Danville and other so-called "seperate" oil companies. However, when payday came, the comapnies would divide their spoils amongst each other, and to their superiors. Danville never actually got its hands on true oil, it was entirely administrative over the miniature companies. Still, Rockefella was actively involved with everything, and often travelled to the comapnies to remind them what they're doing and who was boss.
The Government of Lichenblossom officially recognized Danville Oil as a total monopoly in 1979. As a monopoly, Rockefella singlehandedly (but indirectly through hsi hierarchies, of course) controlled the oil prices. With the mere clap of his flippers, he could triple oil prices. The populace would have to accept it. This is technically a crime, but without an effective process, who could stop it?
That was when Candia came in.
Involvement
- Main article: Ministry of the Oversight of Monopolies
Danville Oil was one of the first businesses to ever be forecefully regulated.
The head of state of Lichenblossom appointed a psychotic penguin named Candia Sermunculli to be the Assistant Attorney General of Lichenblossom. Her purpose was to catch Danville Oil (or Rockefella) in the act of monopolistic practices, such as manipulating the supoosedly independent companies that were actually under Danville Oil's control. Other evidence could be Daville commanding others to drill outside of their zones (say, Phineas drilling in Ferb's jurisdiction), and the other company being perfectly fine with it. They all answer and profit to the same penguin, so why should they care?
Candia, as Assistant Attorney General, answered to a board of three bureaucrats appointed by the Head of State of Lichenblossom. This board is called the Ministry of the Oversight of Monopolies, or "M.O.M." for short.
Candia's job was to gather evidence and prove that Rockefella was monopolistic and anti-competitive. However, every time she had enough evidence to tell M.O.M., she somehow lost it, or Rockefella otherwise evaded prosecution through a series of unfortunate events, much like Candia's descendent faces on a smaller scale.
Rockefella's hold on oil shattered upon his death in 1992, and the monopoly dissolved, broke up, and quickly became the competitive oil companies we know today. Danville Oil dissolved as well; the only direct descendent from the glory days is Lynda Oil, which still holds a huge share of profit in Lichenblossom's petreoleum department.
The M.O.M., though still in effect and power, hasn't done anything since Danville Oil. There hasn't been any busting in decades. Decisions on whether to disband M.O.M. or not are up for debate in the Abbey, and many are considering integrating the M.O.M. into a proposed international group addressed as the "Monetary International Advisory Program", dedicated to the Lichenblossom crusade of trust-busting, even in sanctioned countries.
Trivia
- Had Danville Oil existed in Dorkugal (assuming Dorkugal existed back then), their pro-monopoly laws would have prevented an Assistant Attorney General like Candia from ever trying to break them up.
- Rockefella's brother is Midas' grandfather. It is rumored that the Aurumen family is so well-off because Rockefella's business secured their family for life.
- Rockefella is a parody of John D. Rockefeller, the richest man who ever lived. Yes, he beats Bill Gates.
- His business is a parody of Rockefeller's Standard Oil trust system.