Frosian War
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This tale has been told! It's done! |
| Frosian War | |||||||||||
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      Top: A Shopper Stealth Bomber pulling up after dropping a Squarium bomb. Middle Left: Puffalian troops landing in the Frosian Islands. Center: Culldrom space cruisers battling Puffalian tanks. Middle Right: Puffalian tanks landing in Do'rland. Bottom Left: The Puffalian siege of Frostborough. Bottom Right: The De Groot Conference. | |||||||||||
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| Belligerents | |||||||||||
Allies: The Axle Powers•  Shops Island•  Culldrome Isles•  Munijoch•  Ed Island United States of Antarctica•  Elite Penguin Force Federal Republic of Polaris• Free Polarian Forces  Malesia Freezeland Seal IslandsSnowinian Theatre  Circular Powers•  Snowiny•  Terra Federation •  Margate •  Amataria Ruscan FederationCulldrome Theatre  Castilla
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Axis: Puffalia Puffarus Zhou East Pengolia Whiteblood Insurgents Melodeevian Nationalists Nexonan Nationalists Yowien Nationalists Brohailian Army Meilor PolarisSnowinian Theatre  Nexonan Nationalist Movement Little PenlandCulldrome Theatre  Snowzerland
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| Commanders | |||||||||||
 Lavender General Broseph General Lorn Steven Snowen General Roberts Joseph Yslenski Isaac Juggernaut EDFan12345 Spike Hike Gary the Gadget Guy Nathaniel B. Kratz Yang Di-Pertuan LOL King Triskelle Christina van Guilera Robert Smith King Carlos Goberna
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 Hans Traugott General Olaf Wu Jiao Ahmed Mello Victor Malkov Feey1 Future-Bro Friedrich Rommel Swiss Ninja
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| Strength | |||||||||||
| June 2014: 250,000,000 |
June 2014: 65,000,000 | ||||||||||
| Casualties | |||||||||||
| Est. 15,000,000 | Est. 62,000,000 | ||||||||||
The Frosian War was a massive armed conflict which was fought over trade routes and governmental supremacy throughout Antarctica. It started over Puffalian and Pufforuscan distastes for Shops Island's hold on the Frosian Islands, which provided the Shoppers with a decisive trade monopoly. So, with supplies from the Zhouese, East Pengolians, and multiple other rebel groups, the socialist Axis forces attacked this important trade route, sparking decisive intervention from the Axle Powers, and eventually turning into an Antarctica-wide war. It was one of the largest and most destructive wars, and was the deadliest war in all of Antarctic history.
Prologue: Civil Breakdown
It was late December 2013, and was nearing Christmas time throughout the Antarctic continent and the vast number of countries rising above the frozen seas. All around, festive penguins and puffles were hanging ornaments, putting up lights, decorating trees, having snowball fights, caroling, and much more. It was the best time of the year; a time that friend and foe alike could put their feet up and sip hot chocolate by their fireplaces while spending time with their family.
But, unfortunately, there were some places in Antarctica that were void of this holly jolly excitement. Communist countries which did not celebrate Christmas such as Zhou and North Joseon, or poor places like Slumolia because of conditions.
Despite these places that could not celebrate the holidays because of natural reasons, there were two places in Antarctica that could not celebrate even if they wanted to: Puffalia and Puffarus.
On these small conjoined nations in the far east, civil turmoil was at its peak as Christmas rolled around. Shopper-imposed trade sanctions kept these two countries from being able to celebrate Christmas. Both countries were in dismal conditions as malnutrition, government crackdown, and a poor quality of life were rampant.
Puffalia's supreme leader, Hans Traugott, was being driven through the streets of Triskale. Triskale was supposed to be the most beautiful city in Puffalia, but the streets were dismal at best. Dead carcasses were rotting in the streets along with trash and sewage. Poverty was widespread as his limousine passed by numerous homeless penguins and puffles, who had no choice but to weakly salute their leader as he drove by. Hans' vehicle eventually pulled into a large palace where guards were there. He stepped out of the limousine and made his way to his office.
Hans: "Stupid people, can't clean themselves up..."
He kept muttering insults and statements to himself as he trudged up the stairs, being winded as he took a break from the top. Upon entering his office, he could see the cityscape from beyond his window. The skies were grey and so was everything else. Smoke billowed from stone buildings as the fire department was unable to quench blazes. Trash piled up in the street, causing a smell that cold even be smelled at the palace. Hans had had enough.
Hans: "HEINZ! GEHT IN HERE!"
A tall penguin dressed in Puffalian general clothing came in the room.
Heinz: "Ja?"
Heinz was Hans' only political adviser; Hans had almost complete control over the country thanks to Superiorism. Heinz and Hans were also good friends.
Hans: "Aren't you sick of what our country has turned into, mein friend?"
Heinz: "Of course. But what can we do about it? The greater powers are holding uns back from achieving greater things!"
Hans: "Exactly. I wish to go to the main government chambers. Get Herr Mello to join us."
Heinz: "Yes sir!"
Heinz saluted his superior and left the room. His orders were to grab Ahmed Mello and bring him to the Puffalian government chambers, where Hans and his minions congregated.
Later that day, Hans, Ahmed Mello and the other political minions had gathered at the Puffalian government chambers. Some penguins were even tracking in garbage as they walked inside the elegant building. Everybody took their respective seats, with Hans obviously taking the fanciest and most prominent one. Ahmed Mello sat next to him.
Hans: "Men, I've called this meeting today to discuss a destabilizing problem that our great nation faces."
Civil Adviser: "Yes?"
Hans: "You are all aware of the current condition of our cities and towns. Does anybody know why it is like this?"
Puffalia's economic adviser swiftly raised his flipper.
Economic Adviser: "Leader, it's because of our sanctions. Shops Island controls das Frosian Islands, making it impossible for our allies to trade with uns."
Hans: "Well, what do you suggest?"
Economic Adviser: "Well, we could try to make amends with them because our economy und citizens are more important than any-"
Military Adviser: "NEIN! Dein vorstellung ist schelcht! Du bist dumm!"
Everyone looked at the military adviser in a cock-eyed fashion. He soon began to sweat before correcting himself.
Military Adviser: "Tut mir leid. Anyway, your idea is stupid. We need to take swift military action and eliminate these capitalist pigs who stand in our way!"
The other advisers and Ahmed Mello clapped in approval of the Military Adviser's idea. Hans was also clapping very slowly.
Hans: "I like your idea my friend, but Shops and their allies are far too powerful."
Foreign Relations Adviser: "Then why not get our allies to help us?"
Hans: "Hmm... Puffarus will help uns for sure, und maybe some other allies. Danke."
Talks among the high-ranking Puffalians continued late into the night, elaborating on menacing plans for revenge on Puffalia's enemies.
A few days later, Christmas had finally come. Creatures from all walks of Antarctic life celebrated joyously by opening presents and spending quality time with loved ones. Meanwhile, Across the Antarctic ocean on Buhu Isle, Shops' president Lavender was getting powdered up for a special Christmas speech that would be broadcasted to all Shopper territories and the mainland.
Lavender was spending his Christmas on Buhu Isle to escape the frigid temperatures found closer to the Antarctic mainland during the holiday season. An assistant came backstage where Lavender was preparing and told the president to come on stage. Lavender did as he was told, but not before taking off his signature headband and replacing it with a generic Santa Hat. He walked out onto the stage to see a small audience of about one hundred Buian citizens who had come out to watch their leader speak. The cameras began to roll as Lavender adjusted his microphone and cleared his throat.
Lavender: "Hello everybody, and Merry Christmas to all of our Shoppers who are watching! On behalf of my family, friends, and the government, we wish you have a safe, productive and most importantly, jolly Christmas Day. While eating your giant Mullet tonight, remember that we are all blessed by good acquaintances, a high standard of living, and, of course, many many presents from Santa."
The president paused as the small audience clapped. Once the cheers died down, he began to speak again.
Lavender: "Along with Christmas, this season is often to be associated with New Years, which means we might as well recap on Shops Island throughout 2013."
"Ever since I first walked into my presidential office on February 2nd, I knew that I was leading the best nation on Earth. Thanks to rather unfortunate events, Shops Island was given the privilege to expand itself into becoming a formidable power, in spite of the fact that us Shoppers had grown used to our position as an irrelevant nation.
United as one, we focused on expanding our military and economy to compete with a tyrannical rising power, Yow, which we faced constant threats from. As March transitioned to April, we were driven into an even more precarious position on the Antarctic stage, facing threats of nuclear annihilation from our greatest enemy.
The Yowiens later followed our footsteps and were able to acquire nuclear weapons, but they decided not to use them for the forces of good, unfortunately. They launched a devastating attack on our homeland; the second in a short matter of time. With help from our allies, we were able to strike back at this tyrannical power and its accompanying axis of nations. We suffered great losses, but our outstanding nation overcame in a better position than we entered in.
May and June should always be acknowledged as months of economic growth and expansion of our empire. Although we had a little skirmish with our former colony of Puffalia, those two months proved to be a great time for Shops Island.
Throughout July and August, however, our nation faced the biggest threat ever laid upon us. With the help of our allies again, we were able to crush the Black Octopus alliance and restore peace and democracy in a majority of Antarctica. Those who died in the GSWVI were not killed in vain. They paid the ultimate price to preserve the quality of life we all uphold today.
Although September was rather laid back for us, we still found ourselves fighting a new enemy longing for independence from its master. As tensions grew between us, I went and met with the leaders of Ed Island and Snowiny. As an alliance of three, we agreed to take on this rising tyrant in efforts of preserving freedom in the Margate Archipelago.
We thought a war on such a small place would be easy, but we were proven wrong. The Nexonans used brutal fighting tactics on our forces, causing casualty numbers that are still unmatched to this day. After near a month of futile fighting, we finally got the upper hand and pushed our forces right to Emperor Octavian's doorstep. But, my wife managed to open my eyes and see that we had become the evil we were trying to fight. Afterwards, our two countries successfully concluded an agreement which would bring peace on Nexon island, for then.
As November rolled in, we thought the Nexonans had become our friends. We unhanded our Nexonan POW's and we paid them reparations, while taking care of our own problems. In Goberna, however, the Nexonans had left a devastating bio-weapon which soon spread throughout our country. They were also devilish enough to convince us that an innocent nation had released the bio-weapon upon us.
In response, we built up our military for a third time before shipping out and leading an invasion of the Melodeeves. With the help of Snowiny and Sandila, we were able to take down the communist regime in a matter of days. Nexon also tagged along, but Margate was nice enough to tell us that they were responsible for the bio-weapon. We shall never forgive, nor forget what the Nexonans unleashed upon us.
Now we are here; Christmas. Our country has come full-circle and has proven itself to be a leading power with a rich culture and some of the best characters that could ever be found. I'm done speaking now. I wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Never-never-never give up!"
The crowd cheered wildly, as Lavender saluted his fans and headed backstage. Paparazzi followed him, asking him questions on his expectations for 2014.
Lavender replied: "I do not know what the future holds for us. There isn't much more we can achieve. I just hope for the best for our nation, and maybe peace for once."
Fast-forwarding through time, it was now late January of 2014. Hans Traugott and his advisers were back at the Puffalian government chambers and had spent the last few months preparing for a secret objective. The Military Adviser and Supreme Puffalian General (whose real name was Sven Olaf) waddled into the building late, where Hans was waiting for him with the rest of the advisers at the round meeting table.
Hans: "Ah, Sven, you've finally made it."
Sven: "Sorry, mein Vorsitzende."
Hans: "Ok. Is Operation: Vorherrschaft underway?"
Sven: "Yes sir. It should be completed within 20 days."
Hans: "Sehr gut. We will show those filthy capitalists the full power of our glorious Superiorist nation!"
Everyone in the room clapped at the proposal. Operation: Vorherrschaft was part of a larger secret plan to expand Puffalia's military in many illegal fashions. The Puffalians were planning for a major operation to take down their greatest opponents, and to finally be recognized on the Antarctic stage.
Hans: "Sorry, but I must go now. I have other meetings to attend to. Tschüss!"
Hans got out of his seat and waddled out of the grand government chambers. His advisers gave a firm salute as their führer passed by. Hans had grand plans, ones that he was intent on not ruining.
Chapter One: Vorherrschaft
As January transitioned to February, Operation: Vorherrschaft was underway, with Puffalian ships sailing the open waters, doing seemingly inconspicuous activities near the coast of Eastshield. However, these ships were not flying the Puffalian flag. They flew the flag of the Slumolians, and their goal? Piracy. Piracy on a massive scale. These ships were not up to snuff with even the poor quality of Puffalian ships. These ships were made of low-grade steel and loaded with weapons; the ideal ships for pirates.
These ships were to flex Puffalia's muscles in the Antarctic trade sector just as Shops did it their way with the Frosian Islands. The Puffalians, however, were to use their pirate vessels to attack and overrun trade ships of enemy countries, namely Shops Island. Ever since the Axle Powers were formed, trade between the member nations was extremely common, and use of Shops' Frosian Islands was upped. Especially essential trades of iron and wood passed through the Frosian Islands as these products were shared among Shops Island and Munijoch. The Shoppers also had a nasty habit of sending great armadas of cargo vessels through the Frosian Islands at once.
These goods were a pristine target for the Puffalians to hijack for Operation: Vorherrschaft. One day, Puffalian pirate ships were spread far and wide of the Eastshieldian coast in efforts of hunting down and trapping Shopper cargo vessels. One of the most formidable Puffalian pirates on the seven seas was named Rudolph Getreiße. He commanded one of the largest and most armed Puffalian piracy craft.
Rudolph found it generally easy to target the large Shopper flanks of cargo ships passing through Puffalia's death trap. In the middle of the day, his small piracy vessel spotted one massive fleet off the horizon. He ordered his shipmates to move them into an attack position, giving them their orders over two-way radios.
Rudolph: "Männer! Send our vessels towards that convoy. Those ships are gold mines for our operation."
Shipmate: "Yes sir!"
Rudolph's boat sped through the water, being able to come within striking range of the Shopper fleet in no time. The crew pulled up alongside one of the larger Shopper ships before attaching on to their hull. Rudolph gathered his crew and gave each of them grappling hooks.
Rudolph: "Men, we'll be doing this the same as usual. I will take Jodl and Josef to attack the bridge. The rest of you split up and secure the rest of the ship."
Crew: "Yes sir!"
With that, the entire crew loaded their weapons and shot their grappling hooks, which hooked onto the deck. They then climbed the lines, before surfacing on the ship's starboard deck. Everyone split up, going to take care of their duties.
From the bridge, the captain of the cargo vessel sounded an alarm, warning all crew members of pirates. However, it was already too late. The captain looked down on the deck below to see his crew being slaughtered by the Puffalian pirates.
RATATATATATATATATA
Captain: "Oh dear."
The captain tried to muster the rest of his crew to fight off the attacking pirates, but their efforts were in vain. Rudolph and his two henchmen eventually made their way up onto the bridge.
BANG BANG BANG
They banged on the bridge door, eventually breaking it down using brute strength. The captain and the remaining crew members put their flippers up in the air, before being promptly shot down by the pirates. Rudolph took the helm of the massive ship.
Rudolph: "Jodl, make sure the other ships are secured. We will make our way back to Shayle."
Jodl: "Ja."
Jodl radioed the other Puffalian pirate crews, who each attacked an individual ship in the fleet. Within minutes, messages came in from throughout the fleet insuring that every ship was now under Puffalian control.
Jodl: "Herr Rudolph, we are secured."
Rudolph: "Gut. Let us make our way to port."
The fleet of cargo vessels, now under Puffalian control, swiftly changed course and were sent on course towards Puffalia, where their resources would be used to fuel the main purpose of Operation: Vorherrschaft. The piracy was only a small part of the grand scheme that Hans Traugott had planned.
Such attacks on Shopper commercial naval trade continued for many more weeks, with the Puffalians receiving all the sufficient supplies they needed for Operation: Vorherrschaft. They also took the ship crews prisoner and used them for slave labor. This became an outrageous concern on Shops Island, one that the Shopper government met with hostility. On February 28th, Vice-president Chill57181 spoke for most of Shops' viewpoint on the issue during a press conference.
Reporter: "Mister Vice President! What is your current opinion on the Puffalian attacks on our civil vessels?"
Chill: "Attacks on our what-now?"
Reporter: "Uhh... The Puffalians have been attacking our merchant shipping, posing as Slumolian pirates. What's your opinion on this?"
Chill: "Umm... I guess that's kinda bad and all and they could really benefit from some more butter... but I haven't heard anything about that until now."
Reporter: "Oh... Well, what should we do about it?"
Chill: "We can always try to make peace talks with them."
The press was not satisfied with their Vice President's answers or knowledge about the current events in the East Antarctic Sea. They promptly booed Chill out of the scene and he fled backstage, where president Lavender was waiting for him.
FWAM!
Lavender slapped his partner upside in the beak. He wasn't happy. He grabbed Chill by his hoodie's collar and yanked the two face-to-face.
Lavender: "WHAT THE HECK MAN!?!? DON'T YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT'S HAPPENING OUT THERE!?"
Chill: "Sorry, but nobody ever informed me."
Lavender: "At least pay attention to the news next time!"
Suddenly, a news correspondent interrupted the two politicians.
Correspondent: "I apologize for interrupting, but the press is waiting for you, Mr. President."
Lavender: "Oh, yes. Uh, be there in a minute."
The president checked himself out in the mirror and adjusted his headband before waddling onto the stage. He was still furious with Chill.
Lavender: "Imbecile."
As he waddled out onto the stage and onto the podium, the press clapped politely, but were not too excited after the response that Chill had given them.
Reporter: "Mister President! What is your opinion on the current situation with the Puffalians?"
Lavender: "The Puffalians have always been a problem for the Shopper peoples ever since we lent them independence almost a year ago. Since then, they have allied with our enemies and have formed a totalitarian state bent on our destruction. I will not stand by as our trade industry goes down the tubes because of some filthy communists! Something will be done about it!"
Lavender's differed response to the crisis impressed the press. They clapped and cheered before calming down again. Another reporter piped up and asked the president another question.
Reporter 2: "What do you plan to do about this?"
Lavender: "In hopes of preserving our goal of maintaining peace this year, I shall appeal to the UAN. I hope that they will answer our cries and help us in our struggle against Puffalian aggression on the high seas."
Reporter 3: "But what if that fails?"
Lavender: "Then we will have no choice but to use our navy to protect our shipping and trade routes. I will appeal to USA president Spike Hike and ask him if we can use their ports for the time being."
The reporters clapped and cheered. They had gotten the answers they were looking for, and Lavender's responses were soon publicized around the continent. Lavender himself waddled backstage, right past a stunned Chill and went over to hug his wife, Violet.
Violet: "You did well, sweetie. I'm proud of you."
Lavender: "Thanks honey."
The next day, Lavender flew to South Pole City for an emergency UAN Security Council meeting. Considering the meeting was called on Shops Island's behalf, Lavender got the head seat in the council. At the round table where he sat, were also the diplomats from the other Security Council countries: The USA, Castilla, Puffle'and, and Frankterre. There was an adjacent table for the representatives of the observing powers: Zhou, Polaris SAD, UnitedTerra, Freezeland and Rusca. The UAN President, Jun Sueng, was also there. He walked up to the head podium and banged a gabble.
Jun Sueng: "Order, order! This emergency meeting was called at the discretion of The Honorable president Lavender."
Jun Sueng took his seat and Lavender stood up in front of the council.
Lavender: "Thank you everyone for coming today. As you all know, Shopper commercial trade is under attack by unwarranted Puffalian aggression, and I believe tha-"
Bo Huanyan, Zhou's UAN representative, stood up and interrupted Lavender's proclamation. Although Zhou was not a security council power, it was an influence power, which meant it had some say over the Security Council's decisions.
Bo Huanyan: "OBJECTION! The acts of Puffaria are warranted, as these attacks are happening on internationral waters. And, the peopre of Zhou wirr support the Puffarians in their struggle for fair trade and free opportunity in this Antarctic economy."
Lavender: "Zip it, commie. As I was saying, I am appealing to the Security Council today to ask for a formal, UAN-backed set of economic sanctions against Puffalia for their acts of tyranny against Shopper commerce in the Eastern Sea."
Lavender sat down, as president Jun Sueng rose again.
Jun Sueng: "Alright then. Fellow members, please state any objections you have to this plan."
None of the Security Council powers seemed to have any objections to the proposal. But, Zhou's representative was still against sanctions on Puffalia. And as Zhou was an observer of the security council, they still had a say in the matter.
Bo Huanyan: "I object! These sanctions are unwarranted acts of tyranny in themserves against an innocent nation. Economic sanctions are an act of war, and the Puffarians have done nothing significant-"
Lavender: "NOTHING SIGNIFICANT!?!"
Bo Huanyan: "No. As I was saying, the Puffarians did nothing wrong. We wourd practically be decraring war against a compretrey innocent country. If yuo agree with me, say I."
Dmitri Shemonov (Rusca's Representative): "I."
Garret Livingstone (Puffle'and's Representative): "Oy."
Ninjinian: "I."
Nobody else seemed to have objections, but four negative votes were still enough to stall any dramatic action from taking place. Jun Sueng interrupted with his verdict.
Jun Sueng: "Well then, since we cannot reach a majority vote among the main Security Council members, and even less agreement among the influence powers, I proclaim to withhold this meeting until further notice."
Withholding the meeting meant that there were not enough votes to make a sufficient and "democratic" verdict. Normally when a meeting is withheld, the topic would never be brought up again. Lavender knew this all too well.
Jun Sueng: "This meeting is dismissed for today. Thank you."
Everybody got up from their seats and packed up individual papers and documents that they had brought for reference and presentation. Lavender was escorted out of the building. He was hit by the brisk Antarctic air as he waddled out of the building and onto South Pole City's glamorous streets. He was escorted to his car, from where he was driven to a hotel to stay the night. The young president spent the rest of the night sulking over Zhou's intervention on an, in Lavender's opinion, fair proposal.
Lavender: "Stupid rice-hatters..."
The day after that, on March 2nd, Lavender spoke with president Spike Hike at the latter's personal residence. They were sitting in Spike's personal residence, in comfy lounge chairs.
Spike Hike: "So, what are you wanting, Mr. Lavender?"
Lavender: "I wish to use your ports on the eastern seaboard to counterattack the Puffalian attacks on my ships, sir."
Spike Hike: "Oh, okay."
Lavender: "What was your opinion on the UAN stuff yesterday?"
Spike Hike: "Well, I agree that due discipline is a good idea. You may use my ports."
Lavender: "Thank you. It means a lot."
Lavender was about to get up to shake Spike Hike's flipper, before Spike interrupted.
Spike Hike: "But..."
Lavender: "But what?"
Spike Hike: "If ANY of my ports get damaged, you can call our deal as good as over."
Lavender: "You have my word."
The two political leaders then promptly stood up and shook flippers. Lavender left soon after, for his return trip to Shops Island.
Chapter Two: A War at Sea
Lavender arrived back in Shops Island on the night of March the 2nd, where he headed to make a speech highlighting these issues:
"In spite of our recent attempts to procure a peaceful solution to the current crisis in the Eastern Sea, our enemies have shot down our proposal. This means that, unfortunately, we must resort to military intervention on the waters. As of tomorrow, all commercial freighting going through the Frosian Islands and along the east coast of Antarctica are to be escorted by a fleet of our warships. This is to secure our trade routes in the ocean, and to make sure they will not be hindered by unwanted attacks on innocent citizens."
That night, the full force of Shops' navy was kickstarted and sent through the Frosian Islands to intercept and put a stop to Puffalian piracy. These warships received permission to shoot down any vessel flying the Slumolian or Puffalian flag. Another war had dawned on Shops Island, and this one would be even more brutal than the others.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
"Ugh... Was die heck?"
Hans Traugott was fast asleep until he was awaken suddenly by a knock on his bedroom door. He got out of bed and trudged over to the door. He opened it there to find Heinz.
Hans: "Heinz? What ist the meaning of this?"
Heinz: "I'm sorry mein Vorsitzende, but I have terrible news for you."
Hans: "I take bad news better when I'm awake on my own terms, you bumbling moron."
Heinz: "Pardon?"
Hans: "Nothing. Anyway, what's das news?"
Heinz: "Reports have come backing saying that Shops has deployed its naval fleet!"
Hans: "Und?"
Heinz: "That means they know about Operaton: Vorherrschaft!"
Hans: "Hmm... Call me back in the morgen."
Heinz: "Was?"
WHAM!
Hans slammed his bedroom door in Heinz's face and locked it, before crawling back to bed and falling asleep once more. He didn't grasp nor was able to guess what would come his way next.
As morning came, the Shopper Navy had arrived at the Frosian Islands, where they stopped. Some ships went to load their ammunition in the northern capital and port city of Mephing, while the rest went to the Frosian Islands' largest city, Erikshaven. Captain Swaggins was already there, and was surveying the loading of ships at Erikshaven personally.
Swaggins: "Alright boys, load that ammo up! Chop chop!"
Crane mounted on the port-side loaded crates of ammunition onto the decks of the warships, which were lined all around Erikshaven's harbor. The larger dreadnoughts were moored out of the harbor in the bay, so helicopters were responsible for transfering ammunition to them. The channel leading to the port was extremely busy and crowded, as many ships were coming in and going out constantly. The outgoing ships were ready to start their first round of duty in the Eastern Antarctic sea. Swaggins was scheduled to board one of the warships that afternoon.
RING RING RING
Swaggins' cell phone, which was attached to his fishbowl, began to ring. Even though he was a fish, he could still use his fins to press the digital buttons. He put the phone on speaker.
Swaggins: "Hello?"
Lavender: "Hey, Swaggins, I have good and bad news for you."
Swaggins: "Oh, what's that?"
Lavender: "I've officially ordered our shipyards to focus and drive into full-force! I'm asking them for our navy's size to quadruple within a sufficient amount of time."
Swaggins: "That's impossible!"
Lavender: "Did I mention that the South Joseoneans are involved?"
South Joseon was renowned for its shipbuilding, which was proven to be even greater and more effective than the likes of Alemania, Suome, or even the USA. The South Joseonans were expert shipbuilders.
Swaggins: "Oh, in that case I stand corrected."
Lavender: "Good choice."
Swaggins: "Well, what else do you have to tell me? You said there was good and bad news."
Lavender: "What I just told you is both good and bad news, depending on the way you look at it."
Swaggins: "Oh?"
Lavender: "Mhm. I'm gonna leave you hang now. Tally-ho!"
Swaggins: "Wait, but-"
BEEEEEEEEEEP
Lavender had already hung up before Swaggins could even finish his statement. But, luckily, the responsibility of fulfilling Lavender's requests wasn't wholly Swaggins' job, as the young fish admiral was to ship out onto the high seas that afternoon..
Meanwhile, shipyards across Shops Island and its colonies began to start back up after a period of dormancy and were soon running on all cylinders. Lavender wanted the fleet to be increased four-fold, which meant that at least fifty ships would have to be built daily. To meet these requirements, SIA Drones started back up to work in these shipyards along with cheap immigrant workers. New shipyards also opened all along the coast of Western and Eastern Shops.
Ships were also being built in shipyards across other places in Antarctica, namely South Joseon, the Seal Islands, Malesia, and Suome. With the help of other countries, many ships were being pumped out every day, ready for service when needed.
"They WHAT!?!"
Hans Traugott was furious when he found out that Operation: Vorherrschaft had come to a grinding halt as ships and supplies had stopped coming into Puffalia.
Heinz: "But sir, we don't have a choice! The Shoppers are shooting down our ships."
Hans: "If they're destroying our ships, then you know what that means... Right?"
Everyone in the room was puzzled. They didn't get the gist of what Hans was saying.
Hans: "This is what I mean."
Hans pulled out a file folder with the word "Klaussified" written in red ink on it. It slid over to Sven, the military adviser.
Sven: "You're suggesting we fight back? Where will we get the resources?"
Hans: "Simple. We will just use our materials differently now."
Before the Shoppers had began retaliating to Puffalian attacks, the Puffalians used scuttled Shopper supplies to build military equipment. Now that the Shoppers were fighting back, Puffalia had no choice but to start using their materials to make new equipment which would help them on the open water.
Later that day, Captain Swaggins had moved on board a warship which was part of a vessel convoy sailing around the Eastern tip of Antarctica. The convoy was en route to Polaris with supplies of steel and luxury goods. They had already encountered pirate craft, but easily destroyed the small boats with ease. The warship crews were jubilant, and weren't bothering to watching the radar or sonar monitors. A lieutenant came up to Swaggins and reported on the latest progress.
Lieutenant: "Admiral, we just shot down another pirate convoy."
Swaggins: "Excellent, my friend. May I ask where we are right now?"
Lieutenant: "We're about halfway around this sea, we should reach our destination by night, sir."
Swaggins: "Good. We shouldn't run into many more pirate after thi-"
BOOM
A large explosion was heard, and the ship's lights went out. Swaggins' fishbowl got knocked off of its perch and fell to the ground, making Swaggins a literal fish-out-of-water. The warship listed to the port side, before evening out. A deckhand ran onto the bridge.
Deckhand: "We've been hit, admiral!"
Swaggins uttered: "That sucks, but I've got bigger problems right now!", while trying to roll around in as much water as he could.
The lieutenant accompanying Swaggins picked the helpless fish up and stuck him in a glass of water. The deckhand followed them.
Deckhand: "Well Admiral, what should we do?"
Swaggins: "Are we taking in water?"
Deckhand: "Yes! We'll go under anytime so-"
BOOOM
Another explosion occurred, and the ship listed to the port side again, but this time it listed much more heavily before succumbing to gravity and collapsing on its side. Everyone on the ship lost their balance and fell onto the wall, which was now the hypothetical floor. The ship's stern then began to sink beneath the waves. The warship would go down at any second. Swaggins had fallen out of his glass now, but tried to retain enough energy.
Swaggins: "Prepare the lifeboats! Evacuate!"
Deckhands on the deck had recovered and started to put lifeboats in the water, as all the crew members clambered in. Swaggins was also brought in, not that he liked it.
Swaggins: "Screw this!"
Captain Swaggins jumped out of an officer's flippers and dived into the ocean. But, before resurfacing, he stayed underwater for a few seconds. From below the waves, he saw the shadow of a mysterious looking figure lurking in the distance. From that figure, an odd-looking projectile began to approach Swaggins. As he swam out of the way, just in time before:
BOOM
The projectile was a torpedo, that was aimed at the lifeboat. When Swaggins resurfaced, the lifeboat had vanished. He was also shocked to see the rest of the convoy in flames, with every ship in the fleet either badly damaged or sinking. Swaggins knew that he couldn't do anything to help, so he decided to do the next best thing: Swim.
Captain Swaggins swam through the freezing Antarctic ocean for hours. As afternoon turned to night, there was no longer much light. Especially under the waves, where not as much light passed through. By midnight, Swaggins had swam all the way to the Frosian Islands. He approached land not far from Mephing, from where he spent a few more hours swimming until he eventually found a port. He went into the docks, and yelled as loud as he could.
"HEY! CAN ANYONE HEAR ME!?!"
One young officer who was helping to guard the port overnight heard Swaggins' screams. He looked around, but didn't see anything. He shrugged his soldiers and went back to his duties.
"HELLOOOO?!???"
The officer continued to hear Swaggins' voices, so he decided to look into the water, the only place he hadn't looked yet. There he saw Swaggins with the top of his body popped out of the water.
Officer: "Admiral Swaggins?"
Swaggins: "Darn straight. Why didn't you hear me earlier?"
Officer: "Well I didn-"
Swaggins: "Enough excuses. Get me a something to swim in, and bring me to your commander!"
Officer: "Yes sir."
The officer waddled away and came back with a glass bowl. He leaned over into the water, and filled up the bowl while scooping up Swaggins at the same time. He picked the bowl up with the fish admiral inside and made his way toward the command outpost.
Swaggins was brought to the command post at Mephing harbor. A commander was awaiting admiral Swaggins as he was brought in, and his bowl set down on the commander's desk.
Commander: "Ah, Admiral Swaggins. It's good to see that you survived that attack."
Swaggins: "Yes. I'm afraid that I was probably the only one."
Commander: "I guess being a fish has its advantages. But, you do know what sunk those ships, right?"
Swaggins: "No."
Commander: "U-Boats."
Swaggins: "U-Boats? Aren't those what the Alemanians and the Khanz used during the Khanzem War?"
Commander: "Yes. The krauts have resurrected them."
Swaggins: "You need to tell Lavender immediately, so he can declare war!"
Commander: "Lavender already knows. But, he's not given feedback yet; it's almost as if he doesn't care."
Swaggins: "Then what will we do!?"
Commander: "Just be patient, admiral. I'm sure they will come up with something. We'll have our revenge."
By the time the sun had risen over Shops Island, president Lavender was ready to address the nation about the current situation in the Eastern Antarctic Sea. Instead of another press report, Lavender stood atop the his Triangle-office's balcony, overlooking Shops City Square. A massive crowd of over one thousand citizens had gathered, with many press and photographers rallying for front row spots. The crowd fell silent as Lavender tapped into his microphone, and began speaking.
Lavender: "Thank you all for gathering here today, folks. I am standing in front of you to deliver somber news. The Puffalians have taken this conflict too far, and have began to resort to submarine warfare to target our merchant shipping. I am afraid that we cannot avoid fate anymore. As much as we have tried to avoid another devastating war this year, the time is nigh that we must go overseas to fight for freedom, again. This time for all of Antarctica and the well-being of almost every creature in the Antarctic. So, I must sorrowfully say that Shops Island has officially declared war on the Superiorist State of Puffalia, for unwarranted acts of tyranny against our nation. That is all for now. Thank you, may Shops Island live strong for many years to come, and most importantly, Never-Never-Never Give Up."
The crowd clapped in a manner of mutual respect, yet not in any excitement. This was the first of many indications that the Shoppers had gotten fed up with war and did not want to go fight another conflict across the seven seas. However, it was official. Shops Island was at war with Puffalia, a former colony, for the second time in under a year.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
It didn't take long for Hans Traugott to find out that Shops Island had declared war on him. He was furious.
Heinz: "Mein Vorsitzende, I don't see what's so bad about this. It's our time to shine!"
Hans: "YOU IDIOT! WE'LL GET ANNIHILATED!"
Heinz: "Oh, right... Well, what do you suggest we do?"
Hans: "Destroy."
Heinz: "Pardon?"
Hans: "We destroy. Destroy everything. We will cripple them so bad that they will be forced to come to terms with us."
Heinz: "So you think we should go all-out with them?"
Hans: "Ja."
Heinz: "Hmm... Well, your word is reason. I suppose you are right. We shall destroy everything."
Hans: "Excellent. Make it apparent to those Shoppers that they will not come out of this the victors. They will be sorry."
Heinz: "Yes, mein Vorsitzende."
Heinz waddled out of sight to go "tell Shops" that "it was on". He ended up sending this fax message to the Shopper military headquarters:
Dear Shops Island, it is on. Prepare to face the fury of our U-Boots.
Later that day, Hans made a speech to the Puffalian peoples concerning the situation.
Hans: "Mein Volk, today the Shoppers have challenged us in der glorious game of krieg. We shall answer their calls with fire und brimstone. I hereby declare that we shall enforce full U-Boot warfare upon the Shopper aggressors. We shall show them fury. No mercy. Long live Puffalia, my people. HURRAH!"
Crowd: "HURRAH!"
Heinz's short fax to the Shoppers was soon received at the SIA military headquarters. An intern picked it up and was shocked at the fax message. Director LMGT was brought from his post to check the letter.
LMGT: "Pfft. Lavender will get a laugh out of this."
Intern: "Should I send it to him, sir?"
LMGT: "Yes, please do."
Intern: "Okay."
The intern took the letter and re-faxed it to Lavender's triangle-office for the president himself to receive.
In the triangle-office, Lavender was looking through stacks of papers regarding legal positions on the Puffalian war declaration. He heard the fax machine ring, so he got up from his desk, and ripped the transmission paper out of the outdated machine. He read the letter before pausing.
Lavender: "Stupid Huns."
Lavender had already seen this coming; he thought of it as an inevitability. Being too concerned to reply formally, he quickly and informally replied and sent the fax to Puffalia's government headquarters. The fax message was not formal or informative at all. Lavender's reply to the Puffalian threat was:
k
The Puffalians wasted no time in following up on their calls for total U-Boat warfare. The Puffalians had quickly spread throughout Antarctica, and were now targeting Shopper commercial shipping in every corner of the Antarctic. The Shopper Navy was stretched to its limit as warships and dreadnoughts had to accompany every convoy going to any given destination.
General Broseph was leading a convoy heading around the west coast of Antarctica, through the Yowien Sea. The convoy was heading for Frankterre with supplies of iron. However, Broseph wasn't very happy with his job.
Broseph: "Of all people, Lavender had to put me with the navy. Stuck-up idiots."
Broseph found the navy to be too uptight for his liking; he very much preferred the army instead. Suddenly, a Frankterran Yowien-Sea-Patrol ship, FNS François Batavia radioed in to the Shopper convoy.
"Shoppers, we have spotted a Puffalian fleet of U-Boats up ahead of vous. You should watch out."
Broseph got on the radio and answered them back. He didn't exactly like Frankterrans, not to mention that he sucked at speaking French.
Broseph (COMM): "We will, mercy buckets."
He ended the transmission, then left where he was posted and made his way to the aft deck, where he saluted a gunman.
Broseph: "Soldier, we have an incoming fleet of Puffalian U-Boats. Be prepared to fire at any time. Alert all other guns to be ready and loaded."
Gunman: "Yes sir."
Broseph then waddled up to the bridge, while giving passing crew members their orders. Once he arrived at the bridge, he moved his way to the sonar panel and looked at it. The captain of the warship came over and also looked.
Captain: "U-Boats. Lots of them."
Broseph: "Duh."
BOOOM
Everyone heard a loud sound, and looked out into the convoy. A torpedo had struck one of the warships. Broseph got back on the radio.
Broseph (COMM): "FIRE AT THOSE U-BOATS! NOW! KILL THE KRAUTS! ALL OF THEM!"
BANG BANG BANG
RATATATATATATA
Guns on-board all the ships began to fire in the water upon the Puffalian fleet. The cargo ships diverted, while the warships came into formation, fighting against the U-Boats.
BOOM
Another warship had been hit by a U-Boat torpedo and was going down. The guns and cannons kept ringing out.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
U-Boats being blown up underwater caused giant explosions beneath the waves. Giant sloshes of water came out of the ocean, with U-Boat parts, fire, smoke; everything. The U-Boats were losing the battle.
Broseph (COMM): "That's it guys! Destroy those Huns! Put them to death in their iron coffins!"
BOOM BOOM
Another two warships were torpedoed. They began to go down; the numbers on both sides were quickly dwindling.
BOOOOM
With one last hit, the last U-Boat had been struck and a flume of water and debris rose above the waves, eventually settling again. The Shoppers had won that battle.
Broseph (COMM): "Good job, boys. We taught those krauts not to mess with us."
The Shopper convoy continued its way through the Yowien Sea after grouping up with the cargo ships which had fled the scene. One of them had been sunk and another one had taken damage, but the convoy continued to make their way through the waters. By nighttime, they had reached the port of Awesome, Frankterre where they unloaded their cargo and stayed in port for the night.
Over the next couple days, battles on the oceans continued between Shopper and Puffalian forces. The Shoppers had expected this to be a strictly naval war; one that would eventually be won with the defeat of the Puffalian Navy. However, it would turn out to be much worse than that.
Chapter Three: Search & Destroy
Hans Traugott had once again assembled his advisers with a Zhouese diplomat and Ahmed Mello in suit. They gathered at the Puffalian Government Chambers to exact the next phase of Operation: Vorherrschaft.
Hans: "Now, you all know why you are here, right?"
Everyone: "Ja."
Hans: "The Shoppers are in chaos. It is time to begin our new operations."
Heinz: "More U-Boots?"
Hans: "Nein. Something much greater than that."
Everyone was confused by what Hans meant. They looked at each other with the same discerning looks.
Sven: "What do you have in mind, mein Vorsitzende?"
Hans: "It is time to end Shopper sea domination once and for all."
Heinz: "Haven't the U-Boots already done that?"
Hans: "No. I'm talking about the Frosian Islands. Shops controls all of Antarctica's trade with that thing."
Sven: "Well what do you suggest?"
Hans: "We invade."
The room fell silent. Nobody liked the idea of an invasion, especially considering the Shoppers were blasting the Puffalians hard as it was.
Hans: "Do not worry, that is why I brought the Zhouese diplomat."
Zhouese Diplomat: "Yes?"
Hans turned to the Zhouese Diplomat and addressed him.
Hans: "You must talk to Wu Jiao and get him to lend us weapons. We cannot do this alone. I shall contact Puffarus and East Pengolia for help, too."
Zhouese Diplomat: "Okay."
Sven: "Sir, how will we launch the attack? Our army is barely 5000 strong!"
Hans: "We shall make every able-bodied male fight for the fatherland. We will not fail. We shall be hailed as the victors to overthrow Shopper imperialism!"
Hans went off and worked fiercely to gather allies for the war. Puffarus decided to side with the Puffalians, while the Zhouese and East Pengolians pledged to give weapons and aid. Conscription was put into order, which saw every able-bodied male called up to fight for Puffalia. Overnight, the army's strength grew from 5000 to almost 60,000. Hans and Ahmed Mello were sitting in a fancy dining room for dinner later that night, and were discussing their war plans.
Hans: "I need your help if we are to win this war."
Mello: "What do you mean?"
Hans: "You must start a civil uprising in the Melodeeves. We must do everything we can to spread Shopper forces thin."
Mello: "I don't know if I can-"
Hans: "DO IT!"
Mello: "Okay."
Hans: "Good. I want you to get on that immediately."
Mello: "Ok. Also, when will we begin our invasion?"
Hans: "Tomorrow morning."
Ahmed Mello gulped. He expected an invasion to be in at least a week or so.
Mello: "But what about Shopper defenses?"
Hans: "What defenses? The Frosian Islands are almost completely unguarded in places other than Mephing or Erikshaven."
Mello: "I still don't believe that it's a good idea to attack so soon."
Hans: "Shut up. I'm in charge here. What I say, goes."
The two stopped their conversation and rather focused on eating their dinner. Hans had already ordered an invasion force to be ready for the next morning, and there was nothing anybody could do to stop him.
In the wee hours of the next morning, the sun slowly began to rise over the Eastern Antarctic Sea. Puffalian ships and landing craft were lined up in the ports of Triskale and Shayle, ready to make their way to the Frosian Islands. They were soon given the "okay" signal. The vessels crept out of port and began to sail southwest to the Frosian Islands to mount their offensive. The lead Puffalian led the assault and rallied his soldiers.
Commander: "Für the Vaterland!"
Soldiers: "FÜR THE VATERLAND!"
And with that, the massive Puffalian fleet was off. They set sail as the drifted away from their fatherland and out onto the high seas, escorted by U-Boats.
Luckily, the Puffalians didn't run into any Shopper resistance. Within a few hours, they had neared the Frosian Islands. There was a grey and white mist all around, and the sun was rising through the clouds, causing the sky to light up in a pink fashion. The morning was beautiful, but the Puffalians were about to spoil it.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
Lent Zhouese warships flying Puffalian flags, opened fire on the Frosian Islands in the distance. At the same time, soldiers transferred from ships to landing craft, which soon motored to land.
RATATATATATA
There were some Shopper forces spread across the beachhead, but there was only patchy resistance against the Puffalian advance.
It took no time for landing crafts to wash up on shore. The hatches of the landing crafts opened, and out came swarms of Puffalian soldiers. They ran through the water and scratched through barbed wire defenses. The beaches were spotted with land-mines, while Puffalian artillery ships continued to bombard the island from out at sea. The scene was thrown into utter chaos, although it did make for a good photo.
These soldiers took no time to secure the beachhead, effectively wiping out the pitiful Shopper defenses. Many more soldiers and equipment eventually came and landed on the beaches, as the Puffalians had began to establish a good foothold. They began to set up post, but were unaware that they had now fully awakened the Shopper War Machine. The Puffalians were yet to push out, and were yet to enter the Jaws of Death.
"The Jerrys did WHAT!?!?"
Lavender was shocked and furious to find out that the Puffalians had invaded the Frosian Islands. Him and General Broseph were in the Triangular office.
Broseph: "Yeah. They've established a foothold on a beach already."
Lavender: "THEN DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!!"
Broseph: "Calm down, I will. I'm gonna get an old friend and then I'll come back to talk to you."
Broseph got up from a seat he was sitting in and waddled out of the Triangular Office, to go get his friend to bring back to Lavender.
News of the successful landing reached the Puffalian fatherland in no time. Celebrations erupted in the streets, as citizens praised the work of their Vorsitzende. The Pufforuscans were also celebrating, while the Zhouese and East Pengolians congratulated the Puffalians on their success. Hans Traugott was in his private lounge enjoying cream soda and toasting one-to-himself for the victory. Suddenly, a servant waddled in with a telephone in his flippers.
Hans: "What do you want?"
Servant: "Mein Vorsitzende, Herr Wu Jiao would like to speak to you."
Hans: "What? GIVE ME THAT!"
Hans snatched the phone out of the Servant's flippers and answered.
Hans: "Hallo?"
Wu Jiao: "Hewwo Hans."
Hans: "Why are you calling me? To congratulate me more?"
Wu Jiao: "No. I am here to say that I am in chawge nao."
Hans: "Ha, I don't think so. I'm the guy who pulled off the invasion, after all."
Wu Jiao: "With me equipment. I take back evewything if yuo no listen me. I also war yuo if."
Hans: "*Sigh* Fine. What do you want then?"
Wu Jiao: "Well first: Yuo must guerrilla. It work good. Trust."
Hans: "And why shouldn't I just plow through the island and take it?"
Wu Jiao: "Shops too stronk. They bwing reinfowcements. Yuo go boom if no listen."
Hans: "Und?"
Wu Jiao: "Yuo hold out longer if guerrilla. Victowy can be yuors."
Hans: "Fine, I'll try."
Wu Jiao: "Good. Bye nao!"
Wu Jiao promptly hung up. Hans hung up, and threw his phone across the room. He sulked into his seat, angered by the fact that he now wasn't being allowed to lead his own army into battle.
General Broseph had driven to Chill57181 International Airport to grab his friend for Lavender. He waddled into the baggage claim section, where some work was still going on from when the airport was bombed back in October. Broseph approached a large set of escalators which linked the gates to the baggage claim, where everyone else was standing, waiting for their friends and family members to arrive. Broseph waited with them, until he spotted his friend. His friend wore a commander's hat and wore a red t-shirt with the same medal that Broseph sported. He called out to his friend.
Broseph: "BRIDGER! OVER HERE!"
His friend reached the bottom of the escalator. Broseph ran over to him and shook his flipper. The "friend" was none other than the supreme commander of the Shopper Air Force, General Lorn.
Broseph: "Good to see you back in the capital, my friend."
Lorn: "Good to be back, although I do prefer my comfortable lodge back in Bro Town."
Broseph: "Well, we can chat later. We need to take care of important business."
Lorn: "Very well."
General Lorn collected his bag from the baggage conveyor and the two waddled outside. Broseph paid the valet to grab his car. The car soon came and the two headed off into the city.
It took them no time to arrive at Shops City Square, where Broseph escorted Lorn up to Lavender's Triangular-Office, where the worried president was waiting. Broseph knocked and opened the office door, revealing his friend.
Broseph: "We're back!"
Lavender was happy to see the two and got up, also to introduce himself to General Lorn.
Lavender: "Nice to meet you in person, finally, Mr. Lorn."
Lorn: "A pleasure I'm sure. Why did you want me here?"
Lavender: "Broseph told me that you were a great military strategist. We could use your help."
Lorn: "Well, he's not exactly lying or anything."
Lavender chuckled. He liked Lorn's attitude.
Lavender: "I think you and I will make good friends. Here, take a seat."
Lavender motioned Lorn over to sit on a couch in front of Lavender's desk. Broseph and Lorn sat on the couches while the president sat in his chair.
Lorn: "Why do you want me here again?"
Lavender: "You are aware of the Puffalians invading the Frosian Islands, yes?"
Lorn: "Darn straight I am. What do you want me for?"
Lavender: "I need you to help us devise a plan to push back the Puffalian invasion. I hear they've resorted to guerrilla warfare."
Lorn: "Hmm... I might have a few tricks up my sleeve."
Lavender: "Good. I hope you can get something working. Fast."
Broseph: "Stop worrying, prezzie. He'll pull through. He always has."
Through the day and night, Puffalian forces amassed on the beaches and spread out into the forests that covered the Frosian Islands. Troops went in every-which direction with the objective to strike fear into the civilian population. Zhouese soldiers also arrived on the island with shipments of weapons. The soldiers were there to teach the Puffalians in the art of guerrilla warfare. As more troops panned throughout the country, a total occupation of the islands seemed inevitable. Days passed and the Shoppers could do nothing but wait.
During this time, Shops also garnered support for the war and asked for the help of the other Axle Powers nations. Shops asked Munijoch to protect New Delphis, while the Culldrome Isles and Ed Island were asked to protect Shopper interests in and around the Yowien Sea. All three nations obliged to Shops' requests. The Shoppers were preparing for an all-out war.
The next day, many Shopper Super Bombers were gathered at the Shopper Air Force base in Deijan, South Joseon. This was the place that General Lorn had designated to launch aerial attacks from; he was sure that aerial operations directly in the Frosian Islands had too high of a chance of being compromised, and that there was a risk of too many planes being shot down. Lorn had flown to Deijan to rally the pilots for their first attack on the Frosian Islands.
Lorn: "Okay men, you are off to fight across the seas. For freedom. For liberty. For democracy. We shall hope that this war comes to an end quickly and swiftly, in our favor. Serve our country well, pilots. Never Never Never Give Up."
The pilots gave a somber clap to Lorn's less-than-arousing speech. Half of the pilots knew that this would be a suicide mission; the bombers would have to go without a fighter escort due to the long distance traveled between Joseon and the Frosian Islands, which put the bombers at risk of being shot down. However, the pilots knew that launching from Joseon was still safer than taking off in hostile territory. The bombers had to fly a very specific route to ensure that they conserved fuel while avoiding East Pengolian airspace.
With the formalities taken care of, the large super bombers lined up on multiple runways at the Shopper airfield. The massive jet engines, which came in six for each bomber, revved up and lined up for takeoff. They each began to take off one at a time, soaring with their heavy payloads up into the sky and off towards their targets.
Pilot 1 (COMM): "Let's go, boys! Let's give these Easter Eggs to the Krauts!"
Pilot 2 (COMM): "Yeah!"
Pilot 3 (COMM): "WOOHOO!"
The bombers flew through the skies for hours, before they came upon the Frosian Islands. Their target: The Puffalian landing grounds. The bomber commander gave the other planes their orders.
Commander (COMM): "Alright men, we'll say Happy Easter to these Krauts and then we'll blow this fish-dog stand!"
As the bombers approached the Puffalian landing beaches, the heavens opened up. The massive hatches on the underbellies of the Super Bombers opened and out came thousands of bombs. They soared down, through the clouds, to the ground.
BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
The bombs fell to terra-firma, where they littered the landscape with explosions and shrapnel. The beaches and forests were carpeted with munitions, killing most Puffalians stationed on the beaches. The Shoppers thought it was a strategic victory and that they had just won the war with such an action. However, they were wrong. They were unaware that guerrilla fighters were now spread across the Frosian Islands. Regardless of such information, the bombers turned around and made their way back to South Joseon.
"Another victory for us Shoppers.", or so they thought.
Puffalian forces had spread across the Frosian Islands. They had captured Shopper bases of operations and had taken Shopper personnel as prisoners of war. Guerrilla fighters had cleared the island of any serious threats and had allowed the Puffalians to be ready for an advance on the Frosian Islands' two largest cities: Mephing and Erikshaven.
Although their landing front had been destroyed, the Puffalians had already brought in sufficient reinforcements to press an actual invasion on Erikshaven. Renno tanks were lined up, ready to attack and seize the strategic city. The Puffalian supreme commander, or Oberbefehlshaber, Gebbert Meinrad, was ready to begin the Erikshaven assault. He addressed his troops.
Meinrad: "Men, we shall make history for Superiorism and our great leader today with the seize of Erikshaven. This will only be the beginning. Today we rule the Frosian Islands, tomorrow the entire world!"
The soldiers cheered enthusiastically at the proposition. They gave out their signature cheer:
"FÜR DIE VATERLAND! HEIL!"
After their chants and cheers, the army began to march their way from the beaches, heading southeast towards Erikshaven. They used a long and wide line of guerrilla fighters, spread across the front, to give a full assault on the enemy with no chances of opponents slipping behind Puffalian lines.
The defenses of Erikshaven were essentially non-existent. The Puffalian army pressed right through the forests without meeting much opposition until they came across the port city. A good number of Shopper troops had gathered there, along with a good number of Shopper naval ships. The Shopper Navy was quick to notice the Puffalians advancing over the hills and coming into the city.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
The cannons on Shopper warships and dreadnoughts opened up upon the Puffalian tanks and artillery. The tanks were merely a distraction, however. As the Shoppers focused on enemy tanks and cannons, guerrilla fighters outflanked the Shoppers and began street fighting.
RATATATATA
The sounds of opposing machine guns rang out within the city streets. The guerrilla fighters pressed through every building, slaughtering civilian and military opposition. White flags began to fly high above the city as parts of Erikshaven began to surrender to the Puffalians.
Eventually, the tanks also began to advance while Puffalian heavy artillery cannons started firing at Shopper ships.
BOOM
The cannons all focused on the command Shopper ship, which was a dreadnought. The dreadnought was eventually sunk. On board a warship, a Shopper admiral was examining his options.
Admiral: "Men, I say we abandon this place and go set up defenses in Mephing. We need to make sure they do not capture the capital or else we are screwed."
The ships listened to their admiral and fired up their engines, fleeing Erikshaven as artillery shells rained down on them. As the warships escaped into the horizon, Puffalian tanks began to roll through the city. Artillery cannons were brought to the capitol building, where the city's mayor resided. Everywhere else in the city, people were surrendering en masse. However, the capitol still had many soldiers guarding it and refused to give up the fight.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
Heavy Artillery Cannons opened upon the capitol building, reducing it to rubble in a matter of minutes. The entire structure collapsed, killing everyone inside. A few Puffalian soldiers grabbed a flag and ran on top of the wreckage. They grabbed a flag pole and tied the flag to it, before hoisting it up. The Puffalian flag flew above the wreckage of Erikshaven's capitol; the Puffalians had won this battle.
Soldiers: "FÜR DIE VATERLAND! HURRAH!"
Lavender was quick to hear about the fall of Erikshaven to the Puffalians. General Broseph and Lorn were with him in his office, listening to their president fume away.
Lavender: "WHAT THE HECK MAN!?!? I THOUGHT YOUR PLAN WOULD ELIMINATE THOSE KRAUTS!"
Lorn: "I obviously couldn't have predicted that they'd resort to monkey fighting."
Broseph: "Yeah. Those commies are always trying new stuff to destroy us."
Lavender: "It's obvious that we need to send in reinforcements."
Broseph: "How? The waters are still clogged with U-Boats. Most of our ships would probably be sunk on their way to Mephing."
Lorn: "Yeah, and fighter craft can't travel that far; only bombers."
Lavender: "Hmmm... I guess I could ask for some help from another source. You two are dismissed."
Broseph: "What?"
Lavender: "GET LOST!"
Broseph and Lorn got up and left the room, leaving Lavender to his lonesome. The president picked up the phone on his desk, and dialed a number in.
RING RING RING
At another, more prestigious desk, a phone rang. The penguin occupying it picked up the phone and answered.
???: "Hello?"
Lavender: "Hey! This is Joseph, right?"
???: "Yep."
The penguin on the other end of the line was Joseph Yslenski, the president of Munijoch.
Joseph: "What can I do for you Lavender?"
Lavender: "Long story short, if you could go defend Mephing in the Frosian Islands for us that'd be great."
Joseph: "Why can't you do it yourselves?"
Lavender: "It's suicide if we try to go through the sea with all those U-Boats. You'd probably be able to send your forces there."
Joseph: "But can't you just launch missiles and destroy the Puffalians or something?"
Lavender: "I probably will, but I'd prefer if you cover this for me."
Joseph: "Well... okay. I know you'd do the same for me, right?"
Lavender: "Of course."
The two leaders hung up. Lavender had signed over obligations of protecting Mephing to Munijoch, which would prove to be a fateful decision. Munijoch's military was nowhere near as powerful as Shops', and was even less prepared to fight guerrilla warriors.
RING RING!
Just as Lavender was about to get back to doing presidential stuff, his phone rang. He picked it up, thinking it was Joseph again.
Lavender: "Yes Joseph, what's the problem?"
???: "Who Joseph?"
It was obvious this was someone else.
Lavender: "Who the heck are you?"
???: "Yuor worst enemy."
Lavender: "Odd. I didn't know Feey1 had my phone number..."
???: "No idiot! It me, Wu Jiao!"
Lavender: "Oh, what do you want rice-hatter?"
Wu Jiao: "I just let yuo know if yuo missile Puffalia I nuke yuo."
Lavender: "Bring it."
Wu Jiao: "Don't twy me young man. No missile or I war yuo."
Lavender: "Kay."
Lavender slammed his phone down, hanging it up. He was annoyed to hear the president of Zhou, of all people, bossing him around. Suddenly, an assistant knocked on the door.
Lavender: "Come in!"
Assistant: "Mr. President, what was that?"
Lavender: "Oh, just the... uh... UAN."
Assistant: "What did they want?"
Lavender: "We aren't allowed to use missiles against Puffalia apparently."
Assistant: "Oh... well that sucks. Have a good day sir!"
Lavender: "You too."
The assistant left the room. Lavender was lying to her. He could have still went through with using missiles against their enemy, but he wanted to keep this war as small as possible; he did not want another war against Zhou.
Munian forces were quick to pack up and ship out to the Frosian Islands to protect the strategic city of Mephing. They knew that if it was captured, the entire region would fall into Puffalian hands.
Upon their arrival in Mephing, the Munians had already lost many ships due to Puffalian U-Boats out at sea. Munian fighters did not have the sufficient range to fly all the way to the Frosian Islands, so the bulk of protecting Mephing was rested on the Munian navy and army, which met up with strands of the Shopper Armed Forces. The Munian general, Blair Yorick, met up with the Shopper general Raleigh Grayson.
Grayson: "Good to see you made it in one piece... almost..."
Yorick: "Thanks."
Grayson: "I hope your forces can defend this city. Us Shoppers are spread out thin throughout the island, most of which is already occupied."
Yorick: "Don't worry. We're a second-to-none army, my friend."
Grayson: "Sure. What are your plans for defense?"
Yorick: "We'll build a defensive line around the city. Turn it into a fortress."
Grayson: "Yeah, good luck with that."
The Munians wasted no time into getting to work. They aimed to turn Mephing into a giant, impregnable fortress. They started by arming city streets and buildings to the teeth, setting up machine gun nests and assault stations all around the city. They also mined laid mines along the outer rim of the city. They strategically blew up any bridges that could make a useful way of entry for the Puffalians, along with digging multiple pits of quicksand and covered-up holes for tanks and artillery to fall into. Mephing seemed impenetrable, even to guerrilla fighters.
"RED ALERT! RED ALERT! WE'RE UNDER ATTACK!"
Suddenly, a mayday call from the Shoppers rang into the Munian-Occupied city of Mephing. They were calling from a nearby air force base.
"WE'VE BEEN OVERRUN BY THE KRAUTS! PREPARE FOR INVASION!"
A Munian commander was quick to reply.
Commander (COMM): "Got it."
The commander went to rally his troops in preparation for invasion. However, all of the Munian army didn't care very much; they thought that they could win such a battle with ease against guerrilla fighters.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
Later that day, cannons began to fire beyond Mephing, raining into the city. The Puffalians had arrived. The Munians began to fire back with unprecedented power, making sure no soldiers were able to get into the city. They succeeded for quite a few hours, until the Puffalians tried something completely new.
VRROOOOMM
Aircraft whizzed over the defensive lines, trying to dodge heavy artillery fire. Paratroopers began to rain out of the aircraft, over a thousand at a time. Munian artillery tried to turn the Puffalians' parachutes into Swiss cheese, but most of the enemy troops were able to make it on the ground. A vicious ground war erupted, with the Puffalian guerrillas outsmarting the modernized Munians at many turns.
Instead of prolonging an unnecessary battle for the entire city, the Puffalians spearheaded an attack on the capitol. At the same time, tanks lent from Zhou had broken through the outer defensive lines, and began to occupy large parts of the city. Munian soldiers began to retreat across Mephing, fleeing and re-boarding their ships.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
The Puffalians began to rain artillery shells on the capitol building, turning it into ruins. Large parts of the city began to surrender one-by-one, as had been seen in Erikshaven. The Munians were gaining heavy casualties. They eventually capitulated and fled, abandoning the city to its destiny. The Frosian Islands, for the most part, had officially fell to the Puffalians.
The Frosian Islands finally had met its fate. The Puffalians were celebrating, as the Shoppers and their allies were in utter despair. Hans Traugott made a public announcement, begging Shops Island to come to the peace table.
Hans: "Dear Shoppers, your position in this world has now become impossible. Accept our terms, and we can live in harmony. If you refuse, we shall continue to attack your, and your allies' positions until your country has no choice. Your prize possession is gone and you no longer have the ability to defend yourselves against our forces. End this war honorably; come to terms of peace now."
Chapter Four: Blitzkrieg
Although the Shoppers' position was now extremely precarious and nearly impossible to cope with, Shops Island showed no signs of coming to terms with their sworn enemy. That day in the Common Legislature, president Lavender delivered a speech which was broadcast to the entire nation.
Lavender: "My fellow legislative colleagues, friends and foe alike, and to everyone watching this. Our position on the Antarctic stage is becoming more and more perilous every minute we refuse to act against Puffalian war efforts. Their armies are getting stronger by the minute, as they enslave their populaces in efforts of conquering Antarctica. Shops Island's duty is to make sure that these efforts are in vain. Wherever Puffalian aggression comes, us and our allies will be there to meet it. Attempts at conquering Antarctica in hopes of establishing tyranny have never succeeded before, and we are to make sure it does not succeed this time. Our nation is committed in a bond of blood, steel, and the hope that one day we can all live in peace and enjoy our lives without such a menace hovering above us. As I speak, the Puffalians are killing innocent penguins and puffles in the Frosian Islands and in their homelands. If we do not intervene, nobody knows if anyone else will. That is why I called this meeting today. Shops Island must stand resolute against the pressure of our enemies. With large tracts of Antarctica falling into Puffalian hands, and the Zhouese breathing down our necks, we must, and we shall, fight until the deed is done. We shall fight until it is over. Until the last man takes his last bullet. We will not surrender to these faceless cowards. We will not be deterred from our duties by those who live in the shadows of evil. Our nation has stood against tyrants before, and we shall do it again. The difference is, this time we do not have a watchful eye guiding us through the mist. This time, we must take control and lead our allies into battle. If we do not succeed, who knows what will happen. Even if our democracy collapses and is swallowed by the ever-growing Puffalian War Machine, it shall always be known, even if they don't like it, that we fought for a cause. We fought to keep Antarctica and every freedom-loving creature within from being swallowed up by these demons. So, my fellow Legislative members, I hope this does not count as filibustering, as that is not my intention. My intention is to note that our position is dire and that we must defend our peoples, whatever the cost may be. If a vote for greater involvement does not pass, then we can do nothing than stand by and watch all of Antarctica fall to evil. I am done now. The fate of all of us now rests in democracy. We shall never give up our hopes and endeavors of a Puffalian-free Antarctica someday. But until then, thank you all."
A rousing cry of cheers and applause came from the common legislature, as well as overwhelming support amongst the public. Lavender's speech had bolstered the confidence of the Shoppers, who now were willing to lay down their lives and resources to ward off evil, which was in the form of Puffalia. This was a major blow for the Puffalians, who had expected the Shoppers to come to a peace conference when first able to. However, Lavender had made it very clear that the Shoppers would fight, until the last bullet was fired and either power was at its knees.
Hans Traugott was quick to find out this bombshell from Lavender. He was not happy. He rallied his government yet again in the Puffalian Government Chambers for a hasty discussion on what to do next.
Hans: "You all know why wir are here? ja?"
Everyone: "Ja."
Hans: "Good. Wir must find ein new way to eliminate die Shoppers if they refuse to agree to our terms."
Heinz: "How?"
Hans: "We will enslave die penguins of the Frosian Islands. They will either be soldiers or slave laborers. They will provide us with anything and everything glorious Puffalia needs."
Sven: "I'll get to work on that."
Hans: "Gut. If the Shoppers do not want to work with us, then we have no choice to eliminate them and their subjects. One by one."
The Puffalians immediately began to round up Frosian citizens. Most men were sent off to fight for Puffalian forces, while women and chicks were forced to go into slave labor camps. Puffalia now had a new plan; as their empire grew, their army would grow ever stronger. It seemed foolproof.
The slave labor was quick to develop many new Puffalian weapons, such as their own tanks, warships, aircraft, and much more. One of their best examples of slave labor was the newly-designed Puffalian Battleship, which was much bigger and more powerful than even the Shopper Dreadnought. It, for example, was massive and had unmatched firepower.
This new method of slave labor and forced military conscription made the Puffalians brutal to the core. It also showed the rest of Antarctica that there was no longer any way to stop the Puffalian War Machine.
Now that president Lavender had issued his statement on the war, Shops would have to live up to its promise. Shops and its remaining territories had the power to make 6.5 - 7 million troops, except for the fact that Shops' peak troop number ever was 285,000. This meant that the government had no choice but to issue conscription to draft every able-bodied penguin of age into the military. It was extremely unpopular with the general public, but it'd have to go through.
From his house in the quiet and majestic Bro Town, Bro was sitting down on his couch with a bowl of popcorn and watching the draft bids. Being quite cynical, Bro loved watching and laughing at the drafting picks. As governor of Western Shops, he was virtually immune from such conscription, even though he was of legal age to fight: 15 years old.
TV Announcer: "Hello everyone who actually watches! Let's get this over with and reveal the numbers for today. Are you ready Shirley?"
Shirley: "You betcha!"
Shirley was a rather attractive female penguin who was responsible for rolling a machine which selected random numbers which would determine who would be conscripted. On each ball was a certain date. Any able-bodied penguin whose birthday was on that ballot was to be drafted. Other drafts, citing SIN numbers instead of birthdays, were more common, however. Shirley spun the machine and out plopped the first number.
Shirley: "July 23rd!"
Roll
Shirley: "December 16th!"
Bro: "Ha, suckers."
Roll
Shirley: "September 2nd!"
Roll
Shirley: "And, February 25th! That's all for today folks!"
Bro, as the hypocrite he was, didn't even pay attention to the numbers. He promptly turned the TV off as soon as the woman had said "that's all", oblivious to anything that could happen to him. So, he went off into his bedroom, where he plopped in front of his Peach laptop and began to watch WaddleTube videos until he fell asleep hours later.
It was around noon the next day when Bro finally woke up from his sleep. He clambered out of bed and went to take a shower, before going back to bed and surfing the web. He was generally calm and relaxed until he heard something a few hours later.
KNOCK KNOCK
Bro: "What the fish?"
Bro jumped out of bed, messing up his covers and knocking the bed itself out of alignment. He grabbed a housecoat and threw it on before running downstairs to answer the door. When he opened it, he saw two tall and stern SIA officials looking down on him.
Bro: "What do you want?"
Agent 1: "Are you Mr. 'Bro'?"
Bro: "Yes."
Agent 1: "Were you born on February 25th?"
Bro: "Mhm."
Agent 2: "Well sir, you've been called up to fight for Shops Island. You've been drafted for service in the Shopper Army."
Bro: "WHAT?!? Do you know who I am!?"
Agent 1: "The drafting office sure doesn't. Pack your things and head to this address."
The agent handed Bro a slip of paper. It read "573 Ray Avenue, Bro Town, Eastern Shops, Shops Island".
Agent 2: "Have a good day sir."
Bro: "But-"
SLAM
The agents slammed the door in Bro's face. He was mad, especially considering the irony of getting one's own door slammed in their own face from inside their house.
Bro: "Stupid little worthless lousy son of a piece of..."
Bro had no choice but to listen, or to face charges. He went upstairs and threw some clothes, his computer, phone and some other basic amenities into his duffel bag. He then went and shut off all his lights and appliances before getting to his car and heading off into town for recruitment.
In the Puffalian government chambers, Hans and his minions were busy discussing what they were going to do next.
Economic Adviser: "Mein Vorsitzende, what is your next plan?"
Hans: "It's time to deliver the knockout blow, mein friends."
Sven: "Was? Pardon?"
Hans: "I'm asking for suggestions, Sven."
Sven: "Oh, right. Uhhh... I believe it'd be wise to attack New Delphis next."
Hans: "And? Why?"
Sven: "It's easy. Once we get rid of another important Shopper territory, they'll collapse! Their entire empire will crumble!"
Hans: "Hmmm. That does sound tempting. Do we have enough resources?"
Sven: "Ja."
Hans: "Sehr gut. You have my permission to start an invasion of New Delphis. ASAP."
Demographics Adviser: "But mein Vorsitzende!"
Hans: "What?"
Demographics Adviser: "We don't have enough troops to start a war on another front!"
Hans: "Yes we do! This efficient guerrilla warfare and drafting is giving us more available troops than ever, you buffoon! Now, I want troops landed on the beaches of New Delphis by tomorrow morning? Am I understood?"
Sven: "Yes sir!"
Out on the open oceans, aboard a Shopper Corvette, SIA Agents were busy at work intercepting Puffalian radio transmissions.
"*Bzzkt*... invasion... *bzz*... New Delphis... *bzzt*... by tomorrow... *bzk*"
Agent: "Invasion? New Delphis? TOMORROW?"
The agent who intercepted the message was a young recruit. He didn't know how to respond, so he called his superior officer.
Agent: "ADMIRAL! COME OVER HERE PLEASE! I HAVE SOMETHING BIG!"
The admiral, who was in an adjacent room, ran to where the young agent was.
Admiral: "Yes?"
Agent: "Look at this!"
The agent showed his superior officer the transmission. He was able to deduct that the Puffalians were planning an invasion of New Delphis now."
Admiral: "Crap. Send that to Shopper High Command, pronto!"
Agent: "But isn't that against-"
Admiral: "JUST DO IT! Didn't they teach you people to override the servers and submit without permission? Do as I say!"
Agent: "Okay."
The young agent broke into the Shopper High Command mainframe and forwarded the transmission to the SIA Headquarters, and subsequently Lavender's Triangular Office to be inspected.
Meanwhile, Lavender and Culldrome president Steven Snowen were in the Triangular Office, discussing Culldrome's role in the war. As of then, Culldrome's job was to protect most of the Antarctic sea from U-Boat threats, by any means possible. Suddenly, an agent waddled into the room with a piece of paper. It was the transcript that was picked up on board the Corvette. Lavender wasn't happy to see the agent, who had interrupted his discussion with Snowen.
Lavender: "Why are you here? What is the meaning of this?"
Agent: "Sorry sir, but you must read this. It's very important!"
Lavender: "Okay."
Lavender took the transcript and read it. He was shocked and despaired by it.
Lavender: "Crap."
Steven: "What?"
Lavender: "Steven, I have a new job for you."
Steven: "Yes?"
Lavender: "Help defend New Delphis against invasion for me, thanks."
Steven: "But we don-"
Lavender: "I can always have you killed here and now if you don't cooperate."
Steven: "Fine. I'll see what I can do."
Lavender: "Good. Our trade routes through the Yowien Sea and Weddell are open to you."
Steven: "Okay. I'll send forces there."
Lavender: "Have them there immediately. They're planning for an invasion tomorrow."
Steven: "Okay. Culldrome is ready to do this."
Lavender: "Are you sure you can do it?"
Steven: "Yes, we probably can!"
Lavender: "I'm putting a lot of trust in you. I'll get Munijoch to help you guys too. Hopefully they don't surrender this time."
Steven: "Heh. They're worse than the Frankterrans."
Lavender: "You said it."
The two political leaders continued their discussion for long afterwards, but the contours of the talks had changed. Lavender was trusting Snowen's forces in their ability to defend New Delphis.
Later that day, Bro arrived at the training camp where he was assigned to. He wasn't happy. He thought he was above such service.
Bro: "Idiots. They don't even know who I am..."
Bro drove his car up to the gates of the large training camp. There were tall fences lined with barbed wire all around the compound, and guard towers everywhere. It was more like a prison than a military base, but times were tough. A guard guarding the main gate approached Bro. He had a bayonet in his flippers.
Guard: "Identification please."
Bro pulled out his passport and gave it to the guard. Whether the guard let him in because either he was a politician, or a draftee, didn't matter.
Guard: "Thanks. You may proceed."
The guard opened the gate, and Bro drove in, going to park his vehicle in the tiny parking lot. Another soldier came up to him as soon as he stepped out of the car.
Bro: "Yes?"
Soldier: "Are you a draftee, sir?"
Bro: "That and much more I believe."
Soldier: "Okay wise guy, follow me."
The soldier escorted Bro to the main building, where he was handed over to a general. The general brought him to some barracks. Bro was given the bottom bunk on a bunk-bed to sleep in.
General: "Training starts tomorrow at six hundred hours sharp, recruit. Be ready."
Bro: "Alright."
Bro laid down on his bed and began to unpack his goods. He put them in a small drawer beside his bed. He immediately drifted off to sleep, neglecting the option to have dinner. He preferred sleep much more.
In Sunset City, General Broseph was busy supervising the barricade of Sunset City from Puffalian forces. The Shoppers were expecting a major frontal offensive directly on the capital.
Broseph: "Let's go boys, get those cannons lined up!"
Artillery Cannons were being lined up along the seafront to fire on incoming enemy forces. There was also a considerable amount of ships out in the harbor, ready to sink any enemy ships.
SPLASH
Down the river, Captain Yolo was watching as soldiers threw mines into the water, ready to sink any ship heading down the river. At the Sunset City scene, Captain Yolo was also ultimately in charge of naval operations in the defense of New Delphis. A commander was also their with his admiral.
Commander: "Sir, is it really necessary to plant mines in the city's only river?"
Yolo: "Of course! It'll stop invasion fleets from pushing their ways inwa-"
BOOM
A loud explosion was heard. Everyone turned to the stern of the ship, where a plume of smoke rose from the river. A speedboat had been dodging through the river and had went over a mine, setting it off.
Commander: "Uhh... let me rephrase my question. Is it really safe to mine up these rivers?"
Yolo: "Nonsense my friend, the only civilian lives taken will be those of idiots!"
BOOM
Commander: "Whatever you say."
The next morning, under cover of darkness, Puffalian forces, including new Frosian draftees, set off from Mephing in a large invasion fleet, ready to capture New Delphis for Puffalia. On the water was a massive armada of warships and troop transport ships, along with special craft to carry tanks. There were also squadrons of aircraft tailing along above the clouds, ready to support the blitzkrieg operation by bombing enemy targets into submission.
The Axle Nations had expected a Puffalian attack to come directly upon Sunset City. However, the Puffalians found this too obvious. Their invasion fleet was headed toward the city of Gates, on the southern tip of New Delphis, and far out of allied reach.
TOOT TOOT TOOT TOOT TOOT TOOT BUM BUM TOOOOOT
A bugle hastily awoken all the soldiers at the Bro Town military training camp. Among the trainees was Bro, who was quick to wake up. It was six in the morning, and everyone knew what they had to do. Bro put on some deodorant and his new uniform, which he very much didn't like. He then made his way outside into the courtyard, where a bunch of other new recruits were amassing. A general waddled in front of his group.
General: "ATTEN-TION!"
All of the recruits stood in order and saluted.
General: "Now, greenhorns, I understand that many of you may not want to be here. But, you are doing a valuable and priceless service by serving your country. When this is all over, some of you may receive a presidential award. The rest of you will probably get a bullet in the head for your efforts."
The general's words made most of the recruits nervous. However, the general kept talking on.
General: "My name is Arthur MacDouglas, and I will be your instructor during your training, cadets. You understand?"
Recruits: "YES SIR!"
General: "Good. I'll start you off with two laps around the base. NOW GO!"
Recruits: "YES SIR!"
The recruits set off for two laps around the entire base, which was quite large. Bro hated running with a passion. He sucked at it.
Bro: "Running, of all things..."
It took about ten minutes for all the recruits to finish their two laps. Bro was winded by the time he was finished. Most of the other recruits are also exhausted once they finished their run. This group had a lot to do before they were ready to be shipped out to battle.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
From the skies above, the Puffalians began to drop hordes of bombs on their targets in Gates. They were softening up the city before an invasion could be underway. Puffalian fighters engaged the limited numbers of Shopper and Munian fighter jets nearby, as bombers had an easy time obliterating the city.
Back behind the aerial battle, the large Puffalian armada washed ashore. Thousands of troops ran onto the beaches and made their way into the city, opening fire on any citizens who weren't cooperative.
RATATATATATA
Most citizens were ill-prepared and ill-warned for such an invasion, so they surrendered without a fight. However, many armed partisans and vigilantes took to the streets and began to engage in combat with the Puffalians. With bombs dropping from overhead, the Puffalians were running the risk of killing many of their on men fighting on the streets in efforts of securing the city.
Axle military assistance was almost non-existent, as most military forces had been redirected to Sunset City, where the Shoppers had expected the invasion to happen. As the fighting continued in the streets between civilians and the Puffalians, and with the air battle raging on and growing more furious by the minute, emergency calls were sent out to Sunset City.
An emergency message rung in from Shopper Command in Gates. The allied forces there were being overwhelmed and reinforcements were far away. The message was soon brought to General Broseph.
Commander: "General, Gates is under attack! It will fall at any minute if we don't do something!"
Broseph: "Well, what are you idiots waiting for? Mobilize our troops! But keep some here in case they try to invade Sunset City as well."
Commander: "Yes sir."
The commander ran off to redirect Shopper forces down south to Gates. It would not take long for Shopper aircraft to scramble and head towards the scene, while naval craft traveled through rivers and along the seaboard while army vehicles clogged the roads in their rush south. It was total chaos, but there still might have been enough time to repel the Puffalian advance.
"NOW DROP AND GIMME TWENTY!"
General Arthur MacDouglas was putting his recruits through a cross-fit exercise routine. They had already done four reps of twenty pushups and twenty situps each. This was the fifth rep and everyone was exhausted. Bro has having an especially bad time.
Bro: "This is ridiculous."
Bro's arms eventually gave way and he slammed his face against the grass. He was too tired to get up. General MacDouglas saw this. He waddled over to Bro.
General: "MAGGOT, IF YOU DON'T GET UP IN FIVE SECONDS THIS WHOLE GROUP IS DOING ANOTHER LAP!"
Bro: "Urgh..."
He was certainly tired. All the other recruits stopped what they were doing and ranted him on to get up.
"FIVE!"
"FOUR!"
Bro: "Ugh..."
Bro began to wiggle his arms and got them in pushup position.
"THREE!"
He tried to push up, but flopped down again.
"TWO!"
Bro tried again, but this time he only got up before collapsing down again.
"ONE!"
Quickly, he elevated himself again and brought himself down, milliseconds before General MacDouglas was about to hassle him and make the entire company do another lap around the camp.
General: "I hope I don't have to do that again."
General MacDouglas waddled away, back to the front of the company where he kept giving them orders. Everyone was utterly exhausted, but still these exercises were better than running laps.
In the skies above Gates, large squadrons of allied aircraft began to intercept Puffalian fighters and bombers. Shopper warships also began to engage in naval battles with Puffalian battleships. General Broseph led his troops into battle in the streets of Gates. He was working alongside his famed 9001st Legion.
Broseph: "C'mon boys, let's show these krauts what we've got!"
Soldier 1: "Let's do this!"
With guns loaded and helmets on, Broseph and four other troops charged into the battle. They ran down a back street, heading towards a large pocket of Puffalian soldiers.
RATATATATATATATATA
Soldier 3: "WHAT WAS THAT?"
Perched up in the buildings on either side of the street, Puffalian snipers were shooting down on Broseph and his troops. They had hit one of them, killing him immediately.
Soldier 2: "JIMMY!"
Broseph: "There's no time to save him! We gotta keep mov-"
RATATATA
A sniper killed another one of the soldiers, leaving only Broseph and two of his comrades.
Broseph: "It's too dangerous here, let's move!"
The three soldiers began to run away from the sniper-filled street and rushed towards where they needed help. Broseph also radioed in some reinforcements.
Broseph (COMM): "Send tanks to my position, we need reinforcements NOW! The snipers here are overwhelming us!"
Tank Commander (COMM): "Roger that, we're sending some there now."
Broseph (COMM): "Thanks. Over."
Broseph and his two acquaintances continued to run down the streets, avoiding bullet fire, Molotov Cocktails and exploding grenades at any turn. As they rounded a corner, they were intercepted by some armed penguins. There were about ten of them. Broseph and his two other soldiers threw their flippers up immediately.
Soldier 4: "We surrender!"
Soldier 1: "What are your terms?"
One of the armed penguins approached the three. He put his gun down as a sign of peace.
Penguin: "We aren't here to harm you guys. Are you Shopper soldiers?"
Broseph: "Yes, why?"
Penguin: "We're partisans. Perhaps we can help."
Broseph: "Much appreciated. Let's go now-"
"LOOK OUT!"
One of the partisans intervened and shoved Broseph and the penguin out of the way, as a grenade flew to the ground.
BOOM
Penguin: "Let's go. We'll guide you guys now."
Broseph: "Good. What's your name, chap?"
Penguin: "Just call me Renzo."
Broseph, his soldiers, and the partisans kept running again. But suddenly, an explosion came out of nowhere.
BOOM
In front of them, a death charge exploded in one of the adjacent buildings, causing it to collapse onto the road, leaving it blocked.
Renzo: "Son of a biscuit."
Soldier 1: "What do we do now?"
Broseph: "Let's try to get around this mess. Come on!"
As Broseph and Renzo lead their soldiers around the rubble, footsteps were heard coming from behind them.
"HALT!"
Broseph turned around, to see about twenty armed Puffalian soldiers. They had their guns loaded and pointing at Broseph and his allies. Everyone put their flippers up.
Puffalian Soldier: "THROW DOWN YOUR WEAPONS! YOU'RE UNDER ARREST!"
Everyone dropped their weapons, with flippers in the air. The Puffalian soldier pointed at Broseph.
Puffalian Soldier: "You, over here!"
Broseph stepped forward. However, he had a plan. He put his arms down.
Puffalian Soldier: "WHAT ARE YOU DOING? PUT YOUR FLIPPERS UP!"
Suddenly, Broseph grabbed into his pocket and pulled out his pistol.
BANG
BANG
BOOM
Broseph fired his pistol at a barrel of oil behind the Puffalian soldiers. The barrel exploded, killing the Puffalians immediately.
Broseph: "You're welcome. Let's keep moving."
Broseph's column continued to advance, making their way over the rubble of the collapsed building in front of them. They ran down the street, avoiding more gunfire, but losing a few soldiers to snipers. Eventually, they met up with another group of Shopper soldiers; they had tanks. As one large combined force, the Shoppers and partisans began to push through Puffalian forces, as they headed toward Gates' town hall.
Back at the military training camp, the new troop of recruits was eating dinner in the Mess Hall. Surprisingly, the food consisted of gourmet vegetables with some sweets added. Bro was sitting down at a bench with some of the other recruits, trying to socialize with those other penguins at the table.
"Hey Bro! Is that you?"
Bro: "What the heck?"
Bro turned around to see someone waving at him. The penguin ran up to Bro eagerly.
Bro: "Do I know you?"
Penguin: "I'm Slender!"
Bro: "Your point being?"
Slender: "Well, can I sit with you?"
Bro: "Sure I guess."
Bro slid over and let Slender in with his meal. He had a tray with smoked salmon and wontons. It smelled delicious.
Slender: "Did you sign up for the army or something?"
Bro: "Of course not. I got the stupid draft."
Slender: "Ah, we're SIA buddies I guess."
Bro: "I guess. Just let me eat, okay?"
Bro faced away from Slender and continued to eat, although Slender seemed quite hyper and interested. Bro found him to be quite weird.
Meanwhile in Gates, Broseph's armed column had made its way to the Gates City Hall. They had cleared through some obstacles and some battalions of Puffalian troops on their way their, but had only suffered minimal casualties.
Broseph: "Alright guys, we're gonna storm the building and every one of you will take a single room. Renzo and I will secure the mayor's office. Am I clear?"
Troops: "Yes!"
Renzo: "Let's do this! For New Delphis!"
And with that, the troops and partisans stormed the city hall, making their way through the building and occupying most of the city hall without too many bullets being fired. Broseph and Renzo made their way to the mayor's office. They stopped outside the door.
Broseph: "Okay, on my count, we'll break in."
Renzo: "Okay."
Broseph: "Three... Two... One... go!"
The two penguins slammed open the door, with guns pointed at the mayor who was sitting there. He put his flippers up.
Mayor: "Who are you? What do you want?"
Broseph: "Nothing. We're just here to protect you."
Mayor: "Well you could've knocked."
Broseph waddled over to the mayor's balcony and pulled a sniper machine gun out of his inventory. He mounted it on the railing and pointed it down at the City Hall entrance, where any Puffalian invaders might come in. Renzo did the same on the another balcony.
Mayor: "How long will you be here?"
Broseph: "Until the Krauts are gone. These guys have an obsession with taking over city halls."
Mayor: "I see."
The mayor waddled back to his desk and continued with his work. Broseph and Renzo kept their eyes on the streets below, ready to snipe down any enemy soldiers.
Broseph continued watching his post for a while, he was growing extremely bored. Suddenly, he heard something.
Broseph: "What's that?"
He looked up into the sky and saw a bunch of bombs falling directly towards him.
"Crap."
Broseph got up and jumped off the balcony just as the bombs came raining down on the City Hall.
BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
He flew through the air, and the shock-wave caused by the blast propelled him even further into the sky.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"
Broseph catapulted through the air for a couple seconds before slamming into the wall of another building.
WHACK!
He hit his beak on the building, and then fell all the way to the ground, breaking his arm in the process. Everyone else in the City Hall had failed to escape in time; all of the troops, partisans, Renzo, and the mayor inside were killed. Puffalian soldiers stormed the wreckage, not paying attention to the injured Shopper general laying in the street.
Broseph: "Oww...."
"Psst... Yo dude, wake up!"
"Ugh... what??"
From his bunk bed, Bro woke up to the sound of a voice above him. He opened his eyes and saw Slender staring over him.
Bro: "Oh, it's you... What do you want?"
Slender: "Hey, wanna go hit the town?"
Bro: "Excuse me?"
Slender: "I mean, wanna go in town and do some stuff?"
Bro: "Are you out of your mind? We'll get arrested?"
Slender: "No we won't. I have my ways."
Bro: "I still don't know... it usually doesn't turn out very well when I have drinks."
Slender: "Aww c'mon man, nothing bad will happen?"
Bro: "Will you stop bugging me if I tag along?"
Slender: "I guess."
Bro: "Fine. Let's go hit the bars."
Slender: "Good idea!"
Bro got out his civil clothes and put them on. Slender was wearing his purple tuxedo. They casually waddled to the parking lot, and were about to get in Slender's car. It was a rocket-powered sedan, and looked extremely unpractical.
Bro: "How about we go to my car instead?"
Slender: "Why not? This thing can go half the speed of sound!"
Bro: "So I can tell by the rockets. Let's just take my ride, okay?"
Slender: "Alright."
The two penguins jumped into Bro's car, which was much more practical; it was an old red convertible which could seat two. Bro started the engine and drove toward the exit gate, which was closed. A guard approached them.
Guard: "Identification?"
Slender: "Hey."
Guard: "Oh, Slender. Make way in that case."
The guard saw Slender and knew that there was nothing to worry about. He opened up the gates and the two penguins zoomed off.
Due to the timezone differences, it was still light in New Delphis. Broseph eventually collected himself, although his arm hurt like crazy. He grabbed his walkie-talkie and radioed in to another commander.
Broseph (COMM): "Red alert! Red alert! The Puffalians have stormed the city hall! I don't know the current status of the city, but we need reinforcements!"
Commander (COMM): "No can do, sir! The Puffalians are keeping us on edge throughout the city, and our forces are already being pushed back behind city limits. All of our forces are already pulling out; we're retreating to a more secure location."
Broseph (COMM): "No! Just send some tanks through to the city center! We can still defeat them!"
Commander (COMM): "I'm sorry, but our tanks can't penetrate their defensive line! Their artillery cannons will shoot us down!"
Broseph: "SON OF A BISCUIT!"
Out of frustration, he threw his walkie-talkie into the street. He then got up, and saw allied soldiers retreating all around as Puffalians massacred them.
Broseph: "Crap. Maybe I should listen to that general."
Broseph made a run for it, running through the streets while clenching his broken arm, trying to avoid sniper fire.
RATATATATATA
A sniper got his sights on Broseph and was able to shoot at his arm, sending bullets flying through it.
Broseph: "AGH!"
Luckily, the sniper had hit Broseph's broken arm, and the injured general ran, though in more pain than ever. When he neared the outskirts of the city, he saw civilians standing there, pointing in another direction.
Broseph: "What are you people doing here?"
Civilian: "Signore, the defenses ahead are too strong! Head to the water and boats will save you!"
Broseph: "Oh, thanks."
Broseph changed his path, now heading for the ocean instead of the city limits. It was probably a good idea too, as he could hear cannon fire from outside the city limits, as did he see smoke and dust rising into the air from there. He knew that he would be trapped if he couldn't regroup with the retreating allied forces.
He made his way to the sea-front, and luckily there were many civilian craft there. Many fishing boats and even some yachts were being loaded with allied refugees. Broseph hopped on a fishing trawler. Soon after he got on, the small boat took off, heading north up the coast to catch up with the allies.
RATATATATATATATA BOOM BOOM BOOM
The advancing Puffalians had tanks, guns and artillery pointed at the seaboard, trying to sink any civilian craft harboring refugees. Many bullets pierced the small fishing trawler, ans some penguins were hit. Other soldiers managed to plug the bullet holes in the hull before too much water could seep in. The small boats all continued their journey to safety valiantly.
It didn't take long for Bro's car to come into Bro Town. They drove into the heart of the small city, and parked their car in a parking lot, before waddling into the streets. Slender guided Bro into a pub, with a very Puffish feel. They sat down at the bar. The bartender was cleaning a pitcher by hand, before he came over and said hi to them.
Bartender: "What would you lads like to drink?"
Slender: "I'll take a large one of Cream Soda."
Bro: "Just water for me."
Bartender: "What's the problem, boy? Can't handle Cream Soda?"
Bro: "No, it's just I have a bad track record..."
Bartender: "Nonsense! C'mon, try something new!"
Bro: "Okay, I'll have the strongest thing you've got."
Slender: "That's the spirit!"
Bartender: "Great! One pint of Blotch coming right up!"
The bartender went to the other side of the bar to prepare the drinks. He came back with a normal pitcher of cream soda for Slender, and a pint-glass of "Blotch" for Bro. The blotch had a strong scent and when Bro took a whiff of it, he almost fainted. Slender was already chugging away while Bro just stared at his drink.
Slender: "What are you waiting for? Drink up!"
Bro: "Fine."
Bro drank half the glass of the intoxicating drink at once. He swallowed, and slammed the glass on the bar. The side-effects started to show immediately.
"WHOO!"
The fishing trawler carrying General Broseph to safety took a left turn along the coast and went into a river system. It traveled down a couple rivers, before reaching the larger city of Merchants as nighttime came to New Delphis. Once he arrived in the city, paramedics were already waiting at the docks to pick up wounded soldiers. Broseph was placed in an ambulance and was taken to the hospital. Once arriving there, a nurse checked up on him.
Nurse: "We'll have to preform surgery; luckily the arm isn't broken too badly. We'll just have to slip the joint back in place."
Broseph: "Ughh..."
Nurse: "You get a good night's sleep. Surgery will be tomorrow."
Broseph: "Agh... okay..."
Broseph fell asleep in no time, assured that he'd be better soon.
Down south, the Puffalian advance was hitting the allies hard. The Axle forces eventually completely withdrew, falling back to lines just outside of Merchants. They planned to create a defensive line that would shield them from any further Puffalian advances. The defensive line stretched all the way from the ocean, to the border with Eastshield. Heavy Cannons and artillery were installed all along the lines, along with land mines and lots of barbed wire to stop tank advancements. Makeshift airfields were constructed behind the defensive lines and planes were brought in to defend the skies. Ships were brought from Sunset City to protect the ocean lines; the defensive structure looked impenetrable.
"I'M KING OF THE WORLD! WOOO!"
Bro had drunken himself past sanity. As he and Slender stumbled out of the pub, the bartender left them off with these remarks:
"Y'know what they say; They waddle in, and stumble back out. Hope to see ya grogs again!"
Bro and Slender: "Bye!"
The two intoxicated penguins made their way through the streets down the sidewalks, constantly losing balance and they even fell in the street a few times. They made their way back to Bro's car, but this time Slender got in the driver's seat.
Bro: "Don't... don't you think..."
Slender: "I'm... I'm okay... I'm okay to drive... Don't worry man."
Bro: "Oh... al.... alright then."
They hopped in and Slender started the engine. He backed up, crashing into the car behind them.
SMASH!
"HAHAHAHA!"
Bro and Slender were, frankly, too under-the-table to care anymore. Slender drove off, onto the highway. The highway to the military base carved through the treacherous Mario Mountains. The roads bent around cliffs, and Slender was in no condition to drive through the roads. Nevertheless, neither of them cared.
Slender sped around many corners, but luckily there were no other cars around. However, his luck soon ran out when a car with blinding headlights rounded the corner at the same time as Bro and Slender. The headlights blared Slender's vision, causing him to careen into the left lane, and the car sped up, smashing right through the guard rails and went flying off the road.
CRASH BANG CRASH SMASH BANG
The car tumbled down the steep cliffs, smashing and crashing until it landed in a valley, where a few village settlements were. Bro and Slender were knocked unconscious, obviously, by the crash. Luckily, the convertible-car landed on its bottom, and the two passengers didn't attain too much damage to their heads. The car, however, was completely totaled.
The next morning, president Lavender was informed about the fall of Gates.
"AWW COME ON! CRAP!"
Culldrom leader Steven Snowen was also still there, and Ed Island's king EDFan12345 had also arrived. Lavender talked to them over breakfast about the current situation.
Lavender: "So you've heard the krauts got Gates."
Steven and EDFan: "Yeah."
Lavender: "We've set up a defensive line to push back the Puffalian defenses. But, I still need your help."
Steven: "I already have my Exclamator-Class Cruisers at your service. What more do you need?"
Lavender: "No more from you. I was talking to EDFan.
EDFan: "Yes?"
Lavender: "If you could get some of your light cruisers to gang up with the Culldrom cruisers, we'll be invincible against any advance.
EDFan: "Okay, I guess."
Lavender: "Thanks."
Steven: "What will we do if we lose New Delphis?"
Lavender: "Then we're screwed, my friend. Screwed."
Hans Traugott was in his personal war-room. Military Adviser Sven and personal adviser Heinz were also there.
Hans: "Men, those Shoppers have set up a strong defensive line north of our positions. What will we do?"
Sven: "Push through it?"
Hans: "No! That's suicide, even with our forces!"
Sven: "Even with the new recruits from Gates?"
Hans: "Yes!"
Heinz: "You could always outflank them."
Hans: "What?"
Heinz: "Go around them."
Heinz pulled out a map and grabbed a couple of markers. He laid it out; it was in bad shape, but still readable. He drew quite a bit on it, before showing it to Hans.
Heinz: "This red line is their defense. That red dotted line is their sea defense."
Hans: "Duh. What is the blue for?"
Heinz: "That's our advance. We shall cut into Eastshield and push behind enemy lines; we can capture an entire army at once!"
Hans: "What do those red dots in Polaris mean?"
Heinz: "Their reinforcements."
Hans: "What does the other blue line mean?"
Heinz: "The one heading South? I was thinking we should capture Delfinopolis; it will divert Antarctican forces."
Hans: "Hmm... it's risky."
Sven: "Nothing ventured, nothing gained."
Hans: "Fair enough. I'll do it. My ideas are superior after all."
Heinz rolled his eyes.
Heinz: "Good idea, Mein Vorsitzende."
Heinz's plan was daring and reckless at best, but the Puffalians had no choice to see if it worked out or not.
Chapter Five: Backstabber
"WHAT ARE YOU IDIOTS DOING!?! WHY DID YOU LEAVE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT TO GET DRUNK AND ALMOST DIE OF ALL THINGS!?!?!?"
General Arthur MacDouglas was grilling Bro and Slender, who were recovered from their crash. They were sitting in his office, still not totally aware of what had happened the other night.
Slender: "In my defense, it was Bro's car."
MacDouglas: "THAT MEANS NOTHING! WHAT WERE YOU TWO CLOWNS THINKING!?"
Bro: "We were drunk."
MacDouglas: "We don't have room for fools like you around here! You idiots are going somewhere else!"
Slender: "What? Where?"
MacDouglas: "GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!"
General MacDouglas kicked Bro and Slender out of his office. He had it with both of them, and didn't want to look after them. He was sending them elsewhere.
In New Delphis, a large mass of Puffalian tanks and infantry assembled west of Gates. Military Adviser Sven was there to see them off, as they were ready to outflank the Axle defensive line. A field commander was there to meet him.
Sven: "Are your men ready?"
Commander: "Ja. Ready on your command."
Sven: "You may proceed."
Commander: "Danke."
The commander radioed into the rest of the readied army.
"We are go for attack. Let's crush the Axle Powers in their wake. Für die Vaterland!"
With that, the large Puffalian column cut west, overrunning New Delphis' border with Eastshield. After passing into USA territory, they turned North, and motored on behind the enemy lines.
At the same time, the USA's president, Spike Hike, was in Club Penguin. He was at the Town Square, telling eager civilians about the new upcoming party, the new Music Jam. Vice-President Polo Field was also advertising via his Chitter account. As Spike went on from the Town, through the Snow Forts, and into the Plaza, an EPF agent approached him.
Agent: "Excuse me mister president, but may I have a word with you?"
Spike: "Of course!"
The agent pulled the president off to the side, while other agents kept the crowd back.
Spike: "Is there something wrong my friend?"
Agent: "Yes. The Puffalians. They've invaded Eastshield. They seem to be heading back into New Delphis, but the path seems clear and pre-planned."
Spike: "Oh dear. Consult me in my igloo later, thanks."
Agent: "Okay."
The agent left Spike Hike to his wishes, as he went back into the crowd to socialize.
In Munijoch, president Joseph Yslenski was managing federal politics. He was meeting at the Council of the Powers, and was speaking to his government officials on the war effort. He was giving a speech.
Joseph: "Though our military has floundered already in the face of Puffalian tyranny, we shall not be deterred from working towards the pinnacles of civil rights and democracy every Munian holds so dear to themselves. Our allies are assisting us surely, as the enemy comes closer and closer to our doorstep with every evil move they make. Our partners undoubtedly have our backs, and I bet they will come to our aid if anything ever goes-"
SLAM
Suddenly, the door leading to the Council of the Powers slammed open. Out of the door, came an armed penguin wearing a white headband with a yellow star.
BANG!
He fired at the electrical breaker in the room, making everything go dark. Red emergency lights lit up, but by the time everyone had regained themselves, the penguin was gone.
Joseph: "What was that?"
Diplomat: "I don't know sir, but it looks like you're in danger."
Joseph: "I see."
It didn't take long for the presidential Vanguard Force to find out about the attack. They were dispatched in full to protect the president and his wife immediately.
News of the attack on the Munian government spread like wildfire throughout Antarctica. Lavender watched a television broadcast in his office.
News Reporter: "Ever since the attack on the Council of the Powers, the terrorists have targeted many other key locations in Munijoch. The government has recently declared a state of emergency, and has decided to partially withdraw from the Frosian War conflict for the time being. Back to you, Tom."
Lavender shut off the TV and slouched back into his chair.
Lavender: "Now Munijoch is out of the game... Just my luck."
General Lorn was also in the room with the president; Lorn was able to command his bomber raids on the Frosian Islands, from the comfort of Shops City.
Lorn: "We don't need them. I heard the USA has began to mobilize its forces anyway."
Lavender: "Why?"
Lorn: "The Puffalians invaded Eastshield. They're heading back north towards New Delphis, though."
Lavender: "What? You mean they came out of New Delphis, passed through Eastshield, and are going back into our territory?"
Lorn: "I think so..."
Lavender got out of his desk and ran over to a closet. He sifted through many old documents and blueprints, until he was able to find a map of New Delphis. He laid it out on his desk and General Lorn peered over.
Lavender: "The Huns are trying to outflank us! They're gonna cut us off from our supply lines and take our troops prisoner!"
Lorn: "Well, that isn't good."
Lavender: "Certainly not. Get Broseph on the line. I wanna talk to him."
Lorn: "Will do."
General Lorn got out his cellphone and called Broseph. He gave his phone to Lavender while he waited for Broseph to pick up.
Broseph: "Ugh... Hello?"
Lavender: "Broseph! What's wrong?"
Broseph: "Ahh... nothing... I just went under the knife and I'm exhausted."
Lavender: "Are you okay?"
Broseph: "Yeah. What's the problem?"
Lavender: "The Puffalians have cut into Eastshield and are planning on outflanking your defensive line! You have to mobilize your troops to meet up with them!"
Broseph: "But the USA forces are coming! Can't they take care of it?"
Lavender: "I'm pretty sure they're only interested in protecting their territory."
Broseph: "Oh. Well, in that case, I'll see what I can do."
Lavender: "Don't fail me."
Lavender hung up and he slouched back in his seat, again. With Munijoch's interests in more important places now, and with the USA not willing to do anymore than it had to, it looked like New Delphis was more and more likely to be overrun.
Broseph soon got out of the hospital. His new job was to guard his defensive line from being outflanked by the Puffalian forces. He grabbed a car and drove down the highways, until he was redirected to a makeshift base behind the defensive line. There, he met up with another commander.
Commander: "Ah, Broseph. Good you could make it."
Broseph: "Yeah yeah, spare me the celebration and get me a map."
Commander: "Alright then."
The commander grabbed a map and rolled it out for Broseph.
Broseph: "Good. The Puffalians are planning on pushing right behind our lines, although they'll have to pass along some rivers to do so."
Commander: "Let me guess, you want to send ships in there to protect the rivers?"
Broseph: "Yes."
Commander: "I would, but when there's heavy artillery cannons and tanks involved, I don't think those ships stand a chance."
Broseph: "Well, do you have a better idea?"
Commander: "We should just try to hold our flank. Make our forces ready mobilize and meet the enemy I suppose."
Broseph: "Fine, genius. We'll try that. But if it doesn't work, consider yourself sacked."
Commander: "Whatever."
The commander's plan was less than satisfactory, although it had a better shot at working than any other options. Broseph was not eager to meet a seemingly unstoppable force.
BOOM
In Munijoch's City of Progress, the sound of a blast echoed throughout the city's core. Many paramedics and fire crews rushed to the scene to save injured or endangered citizens. Out of the carnage waddled a black penguin. He casually made his way out from the scene and hailed a taxi.
Penguin: "TAXI!"
A taxi cab pulled over and the penguin got in the back seat.
"To the council building please."
The taxi took off, heading to the Council of the Powers. It wasn't a suspicious, order, though. Munijoch let the public often view events going on in the Council of the Powers, as they could go on guided tours at certain hours. The taxi eventually arrived at the council building, and the penguin got out and paid his fare.
He waddled into the building, where two uniformed penguins were waiting for him.
Uniformed Penguin 1: "Good to see you made it."
Uniformed Penguin 2: "Put on your outfit, kid."
The penguin grabbed a headband out of his inventory and wrapped it around his head. The uniformed penguins then slapped some handcuffs on him.
Uniformed Penguin 1: "Follow us."
The handcuffed penguin was escorted to the council chamber. At that time, a meeting was in session and president Yslenski was speaking. Ever since the WhiteBlood attack, he had armed guards there.
Joseph: "...And although our future is uncertain, we shall inevitably fight on to the end. Our nation must remain resolute and committed to maintaining a stable platform for peace and democracy throughout Antarctica. Where there is democracy, there is light. And if that light fades away, then we are all doomed to a life as the slaves of cruel emperors and dictators. So, as one, we shall-"
Suddenly, the doors to the council room opened up. The two uniformed penguins came in with their handcuffed friend.
Joseph: "Why are you guys here? What is the meaning of this?"
Uniformed Penguin 2: "Sorry president, but here we have a WhiteBlood conspirator. He's agreed to tell us the location of other WhiteBlood cells, considering the current situation we face."
Joseph: "Hmmm... Very well, let him speak."
The uniformed penguins took the "conspirator's" handcuffs off. He waddled up in front of the president.
Penguin: "Sir, the cells are... uhh..."
Joseph: "What?"
Penguin: "The cells are located... um..."
Joseph: "Stop messing, boy! Tell us where these terrorist cells are."
Penguin: "Over your dead body!"
The penguin grabbed into his inventory and took out a Gatling gun and opened fire on the council.
RATATATATATA
He shot at many council members, mowing them down with bullets, tens at a time. The other two uniformed penguins also pulled out guns. They shot at two fire extinguishers.
FWOOOSH
The fire extinguishers exploded and gas came out of them. It quickly filled the entire room with a thick fog. President Yslenski pulled out a gun and started firing back through the smoke, as other diplomats were evacuated amidst the chaos. After his gun ran out of bullets, he threw it into the smoke and dispersed with the other diplomats.
When he and the others got outside, he found Maria Yslenski and embraced her.
Joseph: "Oh, Maria! Are you alright, sweetheart?"
Maria: "Yeah... Just shaken..."
A paramedic approached the two with a stretcher in his flippers.
Paramedic: "Sir, madam, are you in need of assistance?"
Joseph: "No, thank you."
Joseph and Maria were later put into a limo and driven away from the city center. Neither of them had any idea why they were being driven away from the city, but suddenly:
BOOM BOOM BOOM
Three large explosions caught Maria and Joseph's attention, as they turned and looked out the back window of the limousine. From the City Center, they saw pillars of fire and smoke rising from the Council of the Powers, the City HQ and the Military HQ. Sirens began blaring all around, as the limousine sped up and changed its course.
Joseph: "Oh no..."
The limousine raced through traffic and got to the City of Progress International Airport. They pulled through security checks and stopped in front of the president's private jet. Joseph and Maria were escorted on board the jet, which swiftly took off, heading away from the Munian homeland.
After being expelled from Shopper military training, Bro and Slender were put on a plane and sent a private location. They were taking a restyled Super Bomber, with a couple seats and other supplies. Their plane took off from Shops Island and landed in their location a few hours later.
As Bro and Slender waddled through the airport and down to the baggage claim, they saw a sign saying "Bro & Slender". They were taken to a car, from where they drove off.
Bro: "Where are we?"
Slender: "Club Penguin City."
Bro: "Do you know why we're here?"
Slender: "Nope."
The two agents were driven to a port, from where they took a ferry to Club Penguin. They arrived at the Harbor in the RCP servers. The two then transferred over to a normal English server.
Bro: "Huh, I haven't been here forever."
Slender: "Speaking of which, we need somewhere to stay, and not the Puffle Hotel."
Bro: "Don't worry. I still have an igloo here."
Slender: "Okay."
Bro and Slender waddled into the forest and got to Bro's igloo. Bro opened the door. Everything in the small igloo was covered in cobwebs and dust, but it'd have to do.
Slender: "When was the last time you used this place?"
Bro: "During Operation Blackout I think. I'm surprised it hasn't been repossessed yet."
The next morning, the Antarctic Mainland, it was a gloomy day in more ways than one. Puffalian forces had pushed their way behind Shopper lines. Allied forces scrambled to fend off the advancing enemy, while USA forces attacked the Puffalian routes through Eastshield viciously. General Broseph was awoken by the sound of yelling sergeants and troops running all over the place.
Broseph: "What's happening?"
Sergeant: "The Puffalians have broken behind our lines, sir! We're sending our forces to meet them as I speak!"
Broseph: "Okay."
Broseph ran out of sight, dashing through crowds of busy soldiers. He burst out of his barracks and made his way to the communications outpost. A Culldrom Officer was surprised to see him there.
Officer: "General Broseph! What are you doing here?"
Broseph: "Cut the chatter and hand me that radio."
Officer: "But-"
Broseph: "NOW!"
The officer timidly handed Broseph a radio transmitter. He turned it on, and sent out a signal.
Broseph (COMM): "Code Red! I repeat, Code Red! We are under attack and need your reinforcements ASAP!"
On the other line, someone picked up. It was none other than General Roberts.
Roberts (COMM): "Roger that Broseph. We're sending our cruisers your way."
Broseph (COMM): "Quickly!"
From his base, General Roberts ordered his Exclamator-Class Space Cruisers into the skies. They turned on some systems, and went into pre-Hyperspace speed. Pre-Hyperspace was a speed nearly as fast as Hyperspace travel, but still lacking.
At the same time, Ed Island's forces were corralled from Polarian bases and their CRS-Class Light Cruisers took off and entered designated hyperspace routes to New Delphis.
Back in Club Penguin, Bro and Slender were out for a waddle. They were on a different server now, and they went into the Town Square. In this Town Square was the famous Club Penguin Stock Exchange building.
Slender: "Be right back. I'm gonna go make some investments."
Bro: "In what?"
Bro: "Whatever. I'll go do something else."
Bro went away from the Stock Exchange Building and transferred to another server. Slender went inside the Stock Exchange and immediately got involved in the hustle and bustle, which was pretty much just a bunch of frantic penguins waving pieces of paper in the air and yelling.
Once transferred back to a normal server, Bro made his way down to the Hidden Lake. He was hoping to take a dip, but was underwhelmed when he saw someone else there. Aside from Bro, there were also two other penguins, a couple, who were holding flippers as they sat with their feet in the water.
Bro: "Excuse me, but you wouldn't mind if I had a swim, would you?"
The male penguin turned around to answer Bro. And, to Bro's astonishment, it was none other than Joseph Yslenski!
Joseph: "Sure, my friend. It doesn't bother us."
Bro: "Thanks."
Bro took off his clothes, pulled some swim trunks out of his inventory and put them on. He then cannonballed into the aquifer, making a huge splash. As he bloated underwater, Bro thought something special of the man he had just talked to. He then resurfaced.
Bro: "Do I know you?"
Joseph: "Probably, I'm Joseph Yslenski, the president of Munijoch!"
Bro: "Oh, cool."
He turned to Maria.
Bro: "You're Maria Yslenski then, right?"
Maria: "Yes."
Bro: "Nice. What brings you guys here?"
Joseph: "Munijoch is under attack by WhiteBlood rebels. We're stopping over here and we're heading off to Shops Island tomorrow."
Bro: "Shops? I'm a governor there!"
Joseph: "I see. Well, we're going to speak with president Lavender about the future of our nation."
Bro: "Too political for me. Peace!"
Bro turned from the Yslenskis and dived deep down into the lake to enjoy himself. He made his way down into the underwater realms, which were largely guarded by Crabs and Shocktopuses. Although it was scary, it was a truly beautiful sight to behold.
As the Puffalians continued to press their attack, allied forces began to engage them along the advancing lines. Shots were being fired all around, and casualties began to mound on both sides. The bad weather turned worse, as a brutal thunderstorm opened up above the battle, making normal air support impossible, or extremely risky to say the least. General Broseph was now on the scene, operating a sniper rifle from a dug-out foxhole.
RATATATATATATA
Broseph: "Hole in one."
"*bzzt* General Broseph, do you read?"
Broseph (COMM): "Yeah, go ahead. What is it?"
"It's me, *bzk*, General Roberts. Our fleets are coming out of pre-Hyperspace and are reaching your positions. Ed Island's forces should be there any second."
Broseph (COMM): "Over."
Broseph threw his radio away and jumped out of his foxhole, taking the ammo with him but leaving the empty sniper rifle behind. He dashed through no-mans-land with gun and cannon-fire coming upon him from every which direction. His forces were slowly retreating to positions behind a large hill, where they'd have a strategic advantage. Suddenly, engines began to roar above the battle site, as Ed Island's light cruisers popped out of hyperspace.
BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG
The CRS-Class cruisers immediately began to barrage the Puffalians with plasma beams and laser artillery. They unleashed Banshee aircraft, which pummeled the Puffalian advance with bombs and artillery.
FWOOSH
The two Culldrom space cruisers were quick to exit pre-Hyperspace and immediately got caught up in the battle. General Roberts released his A-Wings on the Puffalians. For a while, the Puffalian forces slowly began to retreat, but the weather was getting the best of the Culldroms and Ed Islandians.
CRACK SMACK BOOM CRASH
Fierce lightning from above was crippling communications in the Culldrom, and to a lesser extent, Ed Island's spacecraft. From aboard the Culldrom light cruisers, General Roberts was trying to handle the situation.
Roberts: "What's our status?"
Lieutenant: "Sir, the lightning is damaging our power banks."
Roberts: "I beg pardon?"
Lieutenant: "The lightning is attracted to, and is therefore striking our power batteries. They're depleting our power as we speak."
Roberts: "How is that even possible!?!"
"*bzzkt* General Roberts, are you there? Red alert!"
A call rang in from an Ed Island light cruiser.
Roberts (COMM): "I gotcha. What's up?"
"Is this lightning giving you guys electrical *bzzk* problems or something?"
Roberts (COMM): "Yeah, why?"
"Well we're *bzt* in danger of having our power banks destroyed."
Roberts (COMM): "Crap."
Ed Island's spacecraft notoriously ran on negative matter, which was held normally in a vacuum chamber. If it were to come in contact with matter, per say air, the entire reserve would create a catastrophic chain reaction which could cause an explosion equal to the scale of a Squarium blast. Lightning was attracted to the giant spacecrafts hovering above the battle scene, and if any Ed Island cruisers got hit, their negative matter banks would be subject to Oxygen, which they would react with.
"I'm sorry General, but we're gonna have to *bzzk* pull out before anything bad happens!"
Roberts (COMM): "Fine then. Thanks for letting us down."
The Ed Island forces immediately began to withdraw and they headed back to Polaris, where they would be able to escape the thunderstorm. Unfortunately, they had not been able to turn on their infamous glassing machines, as that would take up too much energy that was being used elsewhere.
As the Ed Island craft retreated, this left the two Culldrom cruisers to themselves to bear the brunt of the battle. Puffalian tanks lined up, firing shells and artillery as the storm intensified.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
On the flight deck of the CSV-Unrelenting Force, the lights in the room continually dimmed, and sometimes went completely out. Puffalian artillery was also now concentrated on the ship, causing some pieces to fall right off and careen to the ground.
Admiral: "General Roberts, we're under heavy fire!"
Roberts: "So?"
Admiral: "Our ships can't take both the lightning and the fire from below. We need to pull back if we want to stay intact."
Roberts: "Alright. I'll break the news."
General Roberts got on his radio and called General Broseph in.
Roberts (COMM): "Hey Broseph, bad news."
Broseph (COMM): "What is it?"
Roberts (COMM): "We have to pull out. We're taking far too much damage, and you know how much these things cost."
Broseph (COMM): "Well isn't that just great. Fine, do what you must."
Roberts (COMM): "We're sorry."
Immediately, the Culldrom cruisers began to recall their A-Wings and the two massive spacecraft went back to pre-Hyperspace and fled the scene while they still could. The Culldrom and Ed Islandian space cruisers had not gone without impact, however. The Puffalian advance was severely crippled in a short amount of time thanks to the spacecraft.
Due to logistical problems caused by the battle with the space cruisers, the Puffalians temporarily halted their advance, as they waited for reinforcements to pour through the treacherous Eastshield trail, which was still under attack from USA forces.
After Bro was done with his swim, he dried off and waddled back to the stock exchange. Slender was nowhere to be seen, so he went inside. He covered his ears, trying to muffle out the screams and cries of desperate traders as he sorted through the crowd trying to find his friend. After looking for over ten minutes, everyone fell silent. They all looked up at a balcony above the trading floor. Out came Slender. He stood below the closing bell.
RING! RING! RING!
Slender ringed the bell, and everyone immediately began to vacate. The trading day was over. Slender jumped down from the balcony onto the trading floor.
Bro: "What was that for?"
Slender: "I got to close the bell because I own Olive Group."
Bro: "Seems legit."
Slender: "Tomorrow we have to go to the Everyday Phoning Facility to meet someone."
Bro: "The EPF?"
Slender: "Shhh. There might be unwitting bystanders."
Bro: "Please. We all know practically everyone is an agent these days."
Along the New Delphian front, the Puffalians were battering allied defenses hard. However, the Puffalians were also gathering heavy losses thanks to the USA bombarding their supply lines running through Eastshield. Brutal battles were being fought all around the front. General Broseph was busy on the eastern front, commanding troop movements to counter the Puffalian advance. He was also on the phone with General Lorn, who was trying to get permission to perform bombing raids on the Puffalian lines.
Broseph: "What do you mean they won't let us use their airfields?"
Lorn: "Sorry, but the USA doesn't want to get any more involved than they have to."
Broseph: "Well, what other options do we have?"
Lorn: "I can always go and ask the Polarians. They're already housing Culldrome's and Ed Island's space fleets already."
Broseph: "No. I don't trust them."
Lorn: "Munijoch?"
Broseph: "There's too much turmoil there right now."
Lorn: "But what if we were to intervene? We could restore peace there and make it a secure area to bomb from."
Broseph: "Well, Lavender told me something about that of some sort. He said that with all this WhiteBlood stuff, the SIA is sending some agents there to do some counter-terrorism things. I'll talk to him about it."
Lorn: "Alright. Bye then."
Broseph: "Bye."
Broseph hung up his end of the line. He got back to work on his war plans; bombing raids would surely halt the Puffalians in their tracks, or so he thought.
The next day in Club Penguin, Bro and Slender went to the EPF headquarters to meet up with someone. When they got there, they were greeted by Gary the Gadget Guy.
Gary: "Hello agents! How are you?"
Bro: "Good I guess."
Slender: "Why do you want us here again?"
Gary: "Take a seat."
Gary lead the Bro and Slender to the giant boardroom table in the center of the headquarters. Bro and Slender sat on one side, while Gary sat on the other.
Gary: "You two are aware of the recent turmoil unfolding in Munijoch, correct?"
Bro: "You know it."
Slender: "Stupid commies."
Gary: "Exactly. Your president has pulled you two aside from your previous duties to assist in this, although he didn't seem very happy about it."
Slender: "Must be me. Lavender hates me, although I don't know why."
Gary: "Oh well, he said that you two would make fine agents to serve along with us."
Bro: "Duh."
Gary: "So, your job is to go to Munijoch and help snuff out the insurgents there. Once that's done, the Shoppers will take over responsibilities there."
Slender: "Sounds easy enough."
Gary: "Some of our agents will also be assisting you. I'd like to welcome you to one our greatest agents, straight from our branch in Puffle'and."
Suddenly, some epic music began to play. The gaping cover in the middle of the table opened up, and steam arose from it.
A platform rose from the table, and out came a sleek-looking agent holding a gun in one flipper and a Knicicle in the other.
Bro: "Who are you?"
Agent: "The name's Blond. Jimmy Blond."
Jimmy Blond spoke with a Puffish accent, and had a figure that made both Bro and Slender jealous.
Gary: "Agents, Mr. Blond will be accompanying you on your mission to Munijoch. I'm sure you can get it done."
Slender: "You betcha. When are we gonna be shipped out?"
Gary: "Soon. You should be in Munijoch by nighttime."
Bro: "What? I haven't even eaten breakfast yet..."
Gary: "Then go to the Coffee Shop. Agent Blond can come get to you."
Bro: "Kay bye."
Bro got out of his seat and left the meeting room, and headed off to the coffee shop to get a bite to eat.
Gary: "Anyway, Slender, I hope you can do this without getting in any trouble, you seem to have a record of being reckless."
Slender: "What? I'm not reckless!"
Gary: "Very well, just don't mess anything up, okay?"
Slender: "I won't. I'm not Rookie or anything."
Gary: "That's true."
Gary handed Slender a classified file, with the EPF's logo stamped on it. Inside was a bunch of papers about the WhiteBlood organization, and where they had influence. Slender was told not to open it until he had arrived in Munijoch.
In Shops Island, president Joseph Yslenski and his Maria landed in Shops City. Lavender was there to meet them. Lavender, however, wasn't happy at all. Once Joseph got off the plane, Lavender came out onto the runway and grabbed him by the collar.
Joseph: "Woah! What's going on?"
Lavender: "Listen here you idiot! OUR FORCES ARE OVERSTRETCHED AS IT IS! YOUR FORCES KEEP SURRENDERING ON US, AND NOW YOUR SURRENDER MONKEYS ALLOW YOURSELVES TO BE OVERRUN BY COMMUNISTS!??! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?!?"
Joseph: "There's nothing I could do about it!"
Lavender slapped Joseph across the face. Joseph retaliated by picking Lavender up and throwing him across the tarmac. Maria ran in between them to intervene.
Maria: "Stop! Can't you two handle this in a civilized way?"
At the same time, many secret service agents from both Munijoch and Shops Island ran out to see if their leaders were hurt. Luckily Maria stepped in; a Shopper-Munian war could have possibly broken out if she didn't.
Joseph and Lavender were driven into the heart of Shops City, and they arrived at Lavender's triangular office. Joseph and Maria took a seat on a couch while Lavender got into his office chair.
Joseph: "Are you calmed down yet?"
Lavender: "Yeah, sorry. The situation should be under control in no time. Our elite agents and some from the EPF are already underway to Munijoch."
Joseph: "Alright. I guess I'll ride out the storm here until then."
Lavender: "Fine by me. Just try not to surrender so much."
For the next few hours, Bro spent his time in the coffee shop, drinking hot chocolate and trying to get some shuteye. Agent Blond soon came to grab him, and the two went into the wilderness to meet Slender. There was a helicopter.
Slender: "Get on board you guys."
Bro and agent Blond boarded, with Slender hopping in also.
Bro: "What are we doing now?"
Slender: "We're flying from here to King George's Island, where we'll then get on a plane headed for Munijoch."
Bro: "Okay."
The helicopter took off and headed north towards King George's Island. Bro fell back to sleep during the flight. The helicopter touched down about an hour later, and the three transferred to a larger cargo-carrying aircraft. It was loaded with a few other elite agents, but was mostly vacant. It took off and began its journey to Munijoch.
At a military air base in Puffalia, many jets were arriving, with important penguins aboard. Hans Traugott was there to meet them all. Hans greeted a Nexonan nationalist who got off his plane, and Victor Malkov who was the leader of the WhiteBlood uprising in Munijoch. The three of them looked to the sky, as they saw a massive Snowing 747 come in for landing. It touched down on the runway, and painted on the tail was the old flag of Yow. It taxied over to where the other planes were, and out came former king of Yow, Feey1 Pie. Although he was not allowed to leave the island, the government of Maverick did not care much either way. Feey had also grown rich as a plantation owner. A ramp truck pulled up to his plane, and he waddled down the steps.
Feey1: "Ciao, señor Tradl!"
Hans: "It's Traugott, dumbkomff. Hello."
Hans, Feey, Victor and the Nexonan leader entered a limousine which drove them to the Puffalian government building. In contrast to December, Puffalia was in a better state than ever. The streets were clean and food was plentiful. The citizens of Puffalia were benefiting at the expense of the Frosian Islands and New Delphis.
When their limo pulled up to the government building, everyone was escorted inside. They were brought to a round table, where Ahmed Mello, Wu Jiao, and Heinz were also sitting.
Feey: "Nice chateau you guys have here!"
Heinz: "Es ist ein Schloss. (It's a castle.)"
Hans: "Now, we all know why we're here right?"
Everyone: "Why?"
Hans facepalmed.
Hans: "Well, all of us (except for you, Malkov) have a common hatred of a certain place. A place that has deprived us of our liberties."
Mello: "Shops Island?"
Hans: "Yes. They have ruined our lives for every single one of us. As you know, I am already fighting a war against Shops and Zhou is assisting me. However, we will certainly win if you all pitch in!"
Feey1: "Revenge on that cursed Lavender? I'm in!"
Malkov: "Shops never did anything to me yet... but I'm in."
Nexonan Leader: "Count me in!"
Hans: "Great. I doubt our alliance will fail; Shops is already on the run. If we all pitch in, we can bring a downfall to a tyranny. We'll be heroes!"
Everyone: "Yay!"
And with that, a new alliance had been formed. All of Shops' worst enemies teaming up to go after their opponent. A new axis, more malevolent than any other before, was born.
Chapter Six: System Defense
Over the skies, the giant cargo aircraft carrying Bro, Slender, Jimmy Blond and some other agents, was soaring towards Munijoch. On board, Bro was still sleeping, but he was awoken by Slender.
Slender: "Hey Bro, wake up!"
Bro: "What now?"
Slender: "Follow me. Agent Blond and I are gonna give you a makeover."
Bro: "Fine."
Bro got up and waddled through the plane, up towards the cockpit. He went into a room where agent Blond was sitting. Bro took off his clothes and put on some new ones. He was also given a gun and some golden nunchucks. Bro looked in the mirror.
Slender: "Well, what do you think?"
Bro: "I look pretty swag."
Slender: "Good."
Bro: "How long until we're in Munijoch?"
Blond: "Later. Now, if you excuse me..."
Agent Blond left the room to do some things. Bro stayed there to remark at his outfit; he was certainly proud of himself.
"Oh, crap."
Lavender was reading the newspaper in his office. Joseph Yslenski was also there, but he was reading a book.
Joseph: "What is it?"
Lavender: "Apparently all my old enemies are coming back to bite me in the butt."
Joseph: "I beg pardon?"
Lavender tossed the article over to Joseph, who skimmed through it and read it.
Joseph: "Feey1... Nexonans... Ahmed Mello... Wu Jiao... seems legit."
Lavender: "And there's Victor Malkov."
Joseph: "Wait, what!?"
Lavender: "Yep. Apparently he's responsible for leading the uprising in your country."
Joseph: "Crap. What am I gonna do!?"
Maria: "You could send some troops back to Munijoch."
Lavender: "Don't even think about it. You're not weaseling out of the New Delphis battle. Our forces are still getting pushed back there; the Puffalians have almost reached Merchants."
Joseph: "Well Sherlock, what's your suggestion?"
Lavender: "The SIA and the EPF have the situation under control."
Joseph: "They better."
Lavender: "Anyway, it seems as if all my old enemies are allying against me."
Maria: "What about Swiss Ninja?"
Lavender: "I don't worry about him. But Feey1 is a dangerous radical. I have no idea what he'll pull."
Joseph: "Well, I'm pretty sure we'll pull through."
Lavender: "I don't have any doubts, my friend."
General Broseph was still in New Delphis, skimming over Puffalian attack lines. The allies ran the risk of having their entire forces being cut off. Another general was talking to Broseph; they were talking about the situation and how to deal with it.
General: "Sir, how should we deal with this?"
Broseph: "Hmm... We could pull back to Merchants."
General: "The Puffalians would have an advantage then. It's such a small target."
Broseph: "True. What about a naval evacuation?"
General: "I like that idea, but I bet that the U-Boats would sink all of our ships."
Broseph: "Well, what if we pull back behind Juno River?"
General: "Juno River?"
Broseph: "Yeah. The river just north of Merchants that slices all the way through New Delphis and into Eastshield. It's deep and we could prevent them from crossing."
General: "Do we have any better options?"
Broseph: "No, not at the moment, my friend. I suggest you get to work on moving our forces behind Juno River."
General: "Yes sir."
Juno River was a large and deep river that ran north of Merchants. It sliced New Delphis in half, and was a very good place to put defenses. The allies quickly got to work evacuating civilians from Merchants and moving troops from the defensive line, to behind Juno River; the Shoppers were convinced that they could keep the Puffalians from crossing it, effectively starving their war machine dry.
Aboard the EPF airplane, agent Blond and Slender were having a chat. It quickly turned from a casual conversation to one about guns.
Blond: "Say, Slender, what's your favorite gun?"
Slender: "An M-134, why?"
Blond: "Can you show me it?"
Slender: "Sure."
Slender grabbed into his inventory and pulled out the heavy piece. He handed it to agent Blond. Slender was unaware that Jimmy Blond was sufficient in his knowledge on firearms.
Blond: "Hmm... this looks like a lady's gun."
Slender: "You know guns, do you now?"
Blond: "I know women."
"Hey dudes, what's hanging?"
Bro barged into Slender and Blond's conversation, and moved in on them.
Slender: "Oh, hello."
Blond: "You do know it's impolite to intrude."
Bro: "Of course, but whatever. I think we're coming close to Munijoch, I can see-"
BOOM
All of a sudden, a giant explosion rocked the cabin of the airplane. It listed severely to the right. Agent Blond peered out the window and saw that the right wing had been blown off. Something had hit the aircraft.
Slender: "What is it Jimmy?"
Blond: "Just a wing missing."
Bro: "WHAT?!?"
Captain (COMM): "Get in safety positions and brace for impact, agents! We're going down! Mayday!"
All of the agents struggled to get back to their seats and get strapped in. While doing so, the plane plunged down toward Earth. It spun in a corkscrew fashion, making many of the agents vomit.
Blond: "Follow me, boys."
Slender: "I hardly think this is the time to be moving around!"
Blond: "Unless you want to die, I suggest you follow my lead."
Bro and Slender did as they were told. They unstrapped their seatbelts, and were immediately catapulted onto the ceiling due to gravitational pulls.
Blond: "Come on!"
Bro and Slender crawled on the ceiling behind agent Blond. He lead them to the back of the airplane, as it kept twirling in the air and plunging to its doom. Blond pressed a button and the rear cargo hatch, causing a rapid decompression. Some agents were sucked right out of the aircraft, and the suction made the situation much worse than before.
Bro: "ARE YOU INSANE!?!"
Blond: "Jump, you fools!"
Slender: "You're crazy!"
Agent Blond, sick of Bro and Slender's whining, threw both of them out of the back hatch of the aircraft.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!"
Bro and Slender were in free-fall, and were rapidly falling towards the ground. Above them, they saw agent Blond also jumping. He had a parachute on. He plunged head-first towards the ground, soaring past Bro and Slender. He then opened up his parachute, and caught the two other agents as they came towards him. Bro and Slender were speechless. All three of them floated to the ground. Right before they touched down, their airplane crash-landed in front of their eyes, killing all the other agents that were on board.
Slender: "Bummer."
Bro: "Minor setback I guess."
Suddenly, the three agents promptly landed on the ground. The parachute flopped down on top of them, but agent Blond picked it up and put it back in his inventory for another day.
Blond: "Minor setback indeed."
Slender: "Where are we?"
Blond: "Near the City of Progress. The city center is in the distance."
Bro: "No time to waste, then. Let's go!"
Bro, Slender, and agent Blond began to waddle towards the capital. They had landed in the middle of a field, and it was already the mid-evening. It would be pitch-black outside in no time.
In New Delphis, citizens of Merchants were being evacuated by the thousands. They were being rushed behind the Juno River lines to avoid the advancing enemy. Meanwhile, allied troops were pulling back behind the river and setting up solid defenses, hoping to stop the Puffalian blitzkrieg. The USA's forces also stepped in and defended their part of the Juno River, as to prevent another outflanking of the allies. Meanwhile, General Broseph was already safely behind the Juno River, inspecting new defensive measures.
Broseph: "How are the gun emplacements coming along?"
Soldier: "Very well, sir. They're almost loaded and ready to go."
Broseph: "Are the bridges ready to blow?"
Soldier: "Yes sir."
The bridges along the Juno River were still being used to evacuate civilians. Along the river, the largest artillery cannons ever constructed were being put into place. The rivers were also being mined, as to prevent a naval crossing of the river. Such defenses seemed utterly impenetrable.
As evening transitioned to night, Bro, Slender and agent Blond arrived in the City of Progress. It was futuristic; a truly amazing city. However, it was eerily quiet. While waddling through the streets, trying to find a place to rest for the night, Bro spotted a sign on a streetlight post. It read:
- "All citizens are advised to stay indoors and keep themselves safe and secure to prevent them from being subject to the WhiteBlood menace. ~The Munian Government"
Bro: "Well, that explains a lot."
After more waddling, Slender's EPF Phone rang. He grabbed it and answered the call.
Slender: "Hello? Right now? It's almost midnight! Oh, fine. We'll be there."
Slender hung up. He turned to Bro and agent Blond.
Bro: "What was that about?"
Slender: "We have to get to the City of Progress' EPF branch. Apparently it's an urgent situation."
Bro: "But it's dark out and I'm tired!"
Blond: "Get used to it, kids. Let's go."
Slender pressed a button on his EPF Phone and the three agents were teleported.
FWOOSH!
The three teleported to Munijoch's EPF headquarters. It was small and vacant, but it served its purpose. On the large screen in front of them, the Director appeared, shaded in as usual.
Slender: "Hello sir. What is going on?"
Director: "Agents, I am aware that you are the only ones alive after that plane crash?"
Slender: "Yes."
Director: "Did you not, in any way, consider saving the lives of the other agents?"
Blond: "In all due respect Aun-"
Director: "Say one more syllable and I'll have you executed."
Blond: "Oh, yes, sorry. As I was saying: In all due respect director, I think our lives are more valuable than all the others."
Director: "You should prove that to make the statement valid, agent Blond. Speaking of which, have you men received your mission?"
Bro: "Yes."
Director: "And the transcripts?"
Bro: "Mhm."
Director: "And, you did not open them as instructed I assume?"
Slender: "Of course not."
Director: "Excellent. You can stay here for the night; start your mission as soon as possible tomorrow."
Bro: "But there aren't any beds."
Director: "Let me adjust that."
The Director pressed a button from her seat, and out of the walls came three single-mattress beds. A toilet also popped out.
Director: "Are those proper accommodations?"
Bro: "I guess."
Director: "Good. That is all, agents. And remember: be resourceful, be remarkable, be ready."
The Director's broadcast phased out. The three agents then settled down and went off to sleep. They would open the document in the morning, which entailed their duties for securing Munijoch.
In Puffalia, the Axis leaders were sitting in an eloquent dining hall, eating the dinners of their preference. Hans, Heinz and Sven were eating bratwurst, Wu Jiao was eating rice, Ahmed Mello and Victor Malkov were eating Mullet, and Feey1 was eating a boiled rubber tire. During the middle of the dinner, Hans promptly got out of his chair and got the other leaders' attention.
Hans: "Your attention please."
Wu Jiao: "Yes?"
Hans: "You all know we are up against a powerful enemy. From experience, I think we have all learned we cannot win by just fighting in person."
Mello: "What do you mean?"
Hans: "We need to deliver a knockout blow to them. Something that will stop their ability to wage war on us."
Victor: "Well, Hans, what if we were to hack them?"
Hans: "Pardon?"
Victor: "We could hack into their mainframes. They'd lose all their ability to communicate, let alone operate."
Hans: "Hmm... I suppose it is a risk worth taking. But, do any of you know how to do it?"
Victor: "I can. I have experience."
Feey1: "I CAN! I CAN! I'm awesome at computer stuff!"
Hans: "Fine. Victor and Feey1, you two can work together."
Feey1: "Yay!"
Wu Jiao: "Our government can also help. We could probably hack the more complicated systems."
Hans: "Good. Get to work as soon as possible, my friends. The quicker we destroy their mainframes, the quicker we will win this war. Well, not like we were ever going to lose or something."
BOOM
In Munijoch, Bro, Slender and Blond were awoken from their sleep by the sound of a bomb blast. Before they were fully awake, the door to their headquarters was broken down, and a bunch of WhiteBlood extremists rushed in. They took the three agents prisoner immediately, and they were taken to a local prison which was being held by WhiteBlood. There, they were taken into a large stone room, where they locked the door. Soon after, a WhiteBlood commander waddled in, with an AK-47 rifle in his flippers, and sat the three agents down.
Commander: "Hello agents. It's unfortunate that we have to meet like this. In what way would you fashion your execution?"
Bro: "WHAT!?!"
Blond: "What? Are you not going to interrogate us? No small talk, no waterboarding?"
Slender turned to Blond and said: "That's the problem with these people these days. None of them bother do do a proper interrogation."
Agent Blond chuckled. "It's a lost art", he said.
Commander: "You want an interrogation? Fine. Tell me why you are here."
Blond: "Why are you here?"
Commander: "This is our land! You are simply intruding!"
Bro: "Munijoch is a place for democracy and freedom!"
Commander: "I don't care! The punishment for messing with us is death!"
Slender: "WELL WHAT'S THE PENALTY FOR TREASON?"
Suddenly, an armed general waddled into the room. He came in and shot the commander.
BANG BANG
After he had shot the commander, he threw the gun to agent Blond, whom it belonged to.
Blond: "Thanks."
General: "Puffish agent kills commander. This will be all over the-"
BANG
Blond shot the general, avoiding an inevitable flipper-to-flipper fight. More WhiteBlood soldiers rushed in, but Jimmy Blond shot them down.
Bro: "That was easy."
Blond: "Come on!"
With the door open, the three agents busted out of the room and ran down the hallway. They ran up a flight of stairs, killing two soldiers at the top. Blond slid down the hallway, until he came to another hallway, in which there were WhiteBlood soldiers. Blond wasted no time dealing with them. The three of them burst through the hallways and arrived in a large library-like archive room. They ran right through it, knocking down rows of bookshelves. Blond looked out the window, and jumped. Bro and Slender were about to, but they were yanked from behind. WhiteBlood had gotten them.
Blond: "Oh well."
Blond hijacked a tank, and waited inside of it. Through the periscope, he saw Bro and Slender being dragged out and thrown into a car. The car immediately sped off.
Blond: "This will be fun."
He fired up the tank. The engine roared, and Blond motioned it forward, thrusting it into high gear. The tank was East Pengolian, but much more modern and sleek than the ones used in the Great Yowien War.
As the car sped off, Blond went in hot pursuit using the tank. Blond bursted through a stone wall, sending debris flying everywhere. He was now immediately trailing the car, but the car went even faster. The vehicle turned a bend, making it out of sight of Blond. But, the car ran right into a traffic jam and was stuck. Blond's tank pulled through the corner, still going as fast as possible.
General: "Through the alley!"
The car backed up, and turned into a narrow alley barely wide enough for the car itself. The general thought he had lost Blond, but he was wrong. Jimmy Blond drove the tank right into the alley, destroying the sides of the buildings on either side, throwing dust, material and debris everywhere. The car burst out the other end of the alley, and the tank followed. Blond pushed a couple military vehicles into the river while doing so, and the chase continued.
The chase continued for another ten minutes or so, until the general transferred Bro and Slender to a train. The train took off down the rails immediately. However, this wasn't enough to stop Blond. Agent Blond made his way towards the railroad tracks in a different direction, where he could intercept the train. As the train barreled down the tracks, Blond jumped out of the tank right before the two massive vehicles collided.
BOOM
The train derailed, and Blond jumped out of the way just in time. Luckily, Bro and Slender survived the crash and escaped, meeting up with Blond again.
Bro: "That was amazing!"
Slender: "Yeah! That was awesome!"
Blond: "Don't sweat it, boys. I'm used to it."
President Lavender and Culldrom Supreme Leader Steven Snowen were spending their time in Frostize, trying to garner support for the war. The two leaders were enjoying the sights of Frostize, as it was a nice change from their gloomy lands. They were on their way to the meeting hall of the Archipelago Union. To get there, they were riding an elegant gondola.
Snowen: "This is the life."
Lavender: "You know it. Too bad Shops doesn't have many rivers."
Snowen: "Sucks for you."
The leaders eventually reached their destination, as their gondola pulled up to the dock outside of the AU hall. They were escorted out of the boat and were taken inside the large hall, where representatives from all the AU countries were. Chancellor Frödel Pengvintine was looking over the proceeding. The rest of the council looked on.
Pengvintine: "Hello Mr. Lavender and Mr. Snowen. I understand that you are here about your war?"
Lavender: "Yes, chancellor. We come here today to ask for a formal AU declaration of war on Puffalia and its axis."
Lavender's request was brash and unexpected. Representatives from each of the countries began brewing and whispering under their breaths. Representatives from Castilla and Puffle'and were extremely hesitant. Chancellor Pengvintine looked around the room, gathering the common opinions from everyone's expressions.
Pengvintine: "I'm sorry, but the AU is not in the position for a war right now. The last one was quite devastating."
Snowen: "We understand sir. But, I'm afraid you don't understand the current circumstances!"
Pengvintine: "We do understand your position. However, your Axle Powers have shown yourselves to be formidable; a truly great power."
Snoss Representative: "WE HATE YOU GUYS!"
Ruscan Representative: "SO DO WE, KIND OF!"
Pengvintine: "ORDER IN THE COUNCIL! Sirs, we are terribly sorry, but the AU is not in the position to fight another war. Our interests are not in defending the USA and Polaris."
Lavender: "So be it."
Lavender stormed out of the room in a fit of anger, and Snowen followed after him. As they got out of the massive hall, they stopped to talk.
Snowen: "What are we going to do now?"
Lavender: "They obviously don't care. We'll just have to fight this war ourselves."
The AU nations, for the most part, were unwilling to help. Especially Castilla and Snowzerland, who had both been rattled by the GSWVI. The only willing nation seemed to be Frankterre, even though they didn't seem ready to actually go to war. Therefore, the Axle Powers were left to stand alone against the Puffalian menace.
Back in Munijoch, a military helicopter had came to pick up Bro, Slender and Jimmy Blond. The three agents were transported to another Munian EPF headquarters, this time located in Port de Finipines. They were soon settled in to their new location. It was much larger, high-tech and more luxurious than the headquarters in the City of Progress.
Bro: "This place is much nicer than the last one."
Slender: "You betcha."
Slender waddled throughout the room, until a tile in the floor gave way. It pressed down, and Slender lost his balance and fell. The tile turned on a system, which made part of the wall give way, revealing a much larger room.
Bro: "Woah, sweet!"
Bro and Slender ventured into the room, while agent Blond simply did not care. The room was massive. The walls were lined with every type of weapon imaginable, there was even a small nuclear device there. Guns, grenades, artillery and bazookas lined the walls, while there were tables covered with mines and RPGs. As they ventured further through, a large device on the very back wall caught their attention. It glowed a dark red, something odd was about it.
Bro: "What is it?"
Slender: "I don't know."
Slender flipped a green button on the machine, and sounds began to be made. The red glow faded away and a mahogany screen turned on, reading the following:
- "Program started. Initiating scan..."
The machine went into a scanning mode. For a few minutes, all that could be heard was the humming of the device at work. Then, the screen turned alive again.
- "No threats detected. Opening standard interface."
The machine's screen changed again. This time, the design on the screen was much more complex, and familiar, too. It was a System Defender machine!
Bro: "System Defender? Since when are these in Munijoch?"
Agent Blond came in to see what Bro and Slender had discovered. When he saw it, he remarked: "Ah, a System Defender machine. This is a mainstream piece of equipment for every large EPF facility in Antarctica. It seems like it hasn't been running for a long time."
Slender: "Well, that was underwhelming."
Slender waddled off and started checking out all the cool weaponry again. Bro tagged along, while Jimmy Blond went back into the main room and sent transcripts to Gary back in Club Penguin.
Over the Antarctic skies, General Lorn was flying a Stealth Bomber over New Delphis, along with many other bombers, heading to Juno River to bombard Puffalian advances. The battle had finally broken out along the river, as the Puffalians struggled to try and cross the river. Lorn was doing checks on his company's status and his own payload.
Lorn: "Napalms?"
Co-Pilot: "Check."
Lorn: "Cluster bombs?"
Co-Pilot: "Check."
Lorn: "Cluster Napalms?"
Co-Pilot: "Check."
Lorn: "Squarium Bombs?"
Co-Pilot: "Check."
Lorn: "Alright. Let's get our bombings on!"
Lorn's Stealth Bomber, followed by the other bombers, dived below the clouds and the epic battle unfolding along the Juno River came in sight. Lorn picked up the radio and called General Broseph.
Lorn (COMM): "We're here, buddy!"
Broseph (COMM): "Finally! I knew you'd make it."
As Lorn's bomber approached closer to the Puffalian lines, Puffalian artillery shells bombarded the bombers. Many Heavy Bombers were being shot down, while gunners in the aircraft fought back. Some bombers dropped their payloads prematurely, trying to wipe out the artillery cannons. However, some bombs were dropped on the allied lines too.
Lorn (COMM): "I'm going to break away and do my own thing. Keep on hitting 'em, boys!"
Other Bomber Pilot (COMM): "Roger that, general. Good luck!"
General Lorn separated his bomber from the rest of the fleet, as he ascended back into the clouds to avoid artillery fire.
Lorn: "Accelerate to Mach 2."
Co-Pilot: "Accelerating to Mach 2."
The co-pilot pressed some buttons, and the Stealth Bomber's engines roared into full speed, and it went supersonic. The bomber headed south, deep into Puffalian-occupied territory.
Lorn: "Okay, it's time to descend, lower the engines."
Co-Pilot: "In the middle of enemy territory? Are you on Doom Weed or something?"
Lorn: "JUST DO IT!"
Co-Pilot: "Fine."
Under General Lorn's orders, the co-pilot lowered the engines back down to regular speed and the Stealth Bomber made a steep descent. As it fell beneath the clouds, a large congregation of Puffalian military equipment was in sight. They were the reinforcements needed to capture the rest of New Delphis and thensome.
Co-Pilot: "We're gonna get killed!"
Lorn: "No we're not."
General Lorn flew the Stealth Bomber directly over the large Puffalian lines of equipment. He then flipped open a box with a red button on it.
Co-Pilot: "What are you doing?..."
Lorn: "Calm down."
He pressed the button. The bomb bay in the underbelly of the aircraft immediately opened up, and out came a large Squarium bomb. It dropped from the fuselage, headed straight for the Puffalian equipment.
Lorn: "We're out of here."
Lorn grabbed both the yoke and the throttle. He revved the engines up to top speed and pulled the yoke, sending the Stealth Bomber into a nearly vertical ascent. It was just in time, too.
KABOOM
The Squarium bomb had hit the Puffalian fleet directly, vaporizing it. The cloud of fire quickly penetrated up and through the clouds, but was not fast enough to catch General Lorn's vertically-ascending bomber. However, g-levels on the cockpit were becoming unbearable.
Co-Pilot: "ARE YOU INSANE!?!?"
General Lorn kept ascending, before eventually steadying out. They could still see plumes of smoke behind them, left over from the Squarium blast. At that moment, General Broseph called in on the radio.
Broseph (COMM): "Hey buddy, I just heard an explosion."
Lorn (COMM): "Thank me later."
Broseph (COMM): "What?"
Lorn (COMM): "Nevermind."
Meanwhile, in the undergrounds of Club Penguin Island, someone was brewing.
"Oh, all these evil guys are allying against Shops and the Axle Powers! Why can't I get in on the fun?"
The someone turned out to be none other than Future-Bro, leader of the Brohailian Army. Also there was Bro's evil puffle Pheonix II.
Pheonix: "Then why don't you just call up their leader?"
Future-Bro: "But that would... wait a minute... Pheonix, you're a genius!"
Future-Bro ran out of the room and barged into his office. He picked up the phone, and looked through his personal phone-book, which had lists of the most evil penguins in Antarctica. He dialed in Hans Traugott's number.
In Puffalia, Hans Traugott was not happy with the unexpected phone call.
Hans: "What is it? How dare this stranger disturb my bubble baths?"
Heinz: "Mein Vorsitzende, I suggest you answer the phone."
Hans: "Okay. Give me the phone."
Hans was given the phone, and he spoke immediately: "Look idiot, I don't know who you are but who are you to interrupt my-"
Future-Bro: "Hi! Can I join your Axis?"
Hans: "Who are you?"
Future-Bro: "Who am I? I'M THE BEST X-ANTIBODY EVER! THAT'S WHO!!!!"
Hans: "I don't care. What can you offer us?"
Future-Bro: "We have a good army and we're centered in Club Penguin."
Hans: "Fine. Talk to me later."
Hans hung up the phone, and said: "Idiot. Now, time to go back to my bubble bath."
Hans waddled away angrily. He went away and back into his bathroom to finish his bubble bath. Future-Bro, however, was happy that he was now a part of the evil Axis.
In the EPF headquarters, Bro, Slender and Jimmy Blond were getting bored. Bro was fast asleep while Slender and Blond unenthusiastically talked about guns. But, that was about to change quickly.
- "RED ALERT. RED ALERT. ENEMY VIRAL ATTACK INCOMING. PREPARE DEFENSES."
Bro: "What was that!?"
Slender: "The System Defender!"
The three agents got up and ran to the back of the weapons room. Bro immediately began feeding code into the System Defender machine. The main screen transitioned to an interface.
Slender got on the communications system and spoke: "Who are you? What do you want?"
Voice 1 (COMM): "Death."
Voice 2 (COMM): "Communism."
Voice 3 (COMM): "Revenge."
All of a sudden, the system radar saw hordes of bots coming. Bro set up three red cannons and one orange cannon to combat them. Jimmy Blond radioed in his technical partner from Puffle'and's EPF branch, R.
Blond (COMM): "R, do you read?"
R (COMM): "Certainly, agent Blond, what's the problem?"
Blond (COMM): "There's a cyber attack on the EPF mainframe, coming towards our location. Get Gary on the line!"
R (COMM): "Will do agent."
Bro (COMM): "Who are you guys? Identify yourselves!"
Voice 1 (COMM): "Your worst enemy."
As the bots came in more and more, and Bro combated them, Gary eventually got online.
Gary (COMM): "What's going on, agents?"
Slender (COMM): "No time, G!"
Blond (COMM): "G, trace these attacks!"
Gary (COMM): "It seems as if they're coming from Puffalia, and Club Penguin Island..."
Bro (COMM): "Hurry! Find out who it is!"
Gary began hacking into the enemy system, and was able to destroy their cloaks to find out who they were.
Voice 3 (COMM): "Crap!"
Voice 1 (COMM): "Crud."
Voice 2 (COMM): "Uh oh."
Bro (COMM): "Feey1!"
Slender (COMM): "Future-Bro!"
Blond (COMM): "Malkov."
Feey1 (COMM): "Now that you found us out, it's time for destruction!"
Feey1 pressed some buttons and unleashed a wave of boss bots onto the EPF mainframe. The mainframe took lots of damage, but Bro's defenses were able to hold.
Blond (COMM): "R, disconnect them!"
R (COMM): "I'll try. See if you guys can hold them back."
Future-Bro (COMM): "See if you can take THIS!"
Future-Bro unleashed is entire stock of bots, but Bro was able to hold them off with ease.
Victor Malkov (COMM): "Darn it Future-Bro!"
Feey1 (COMM): "You idiot! You just-*bzzzzzzzzk*"
R (COMM): "Done. They're disconnected."
Slender (COMM): "Thanks."
Gary (COMM): "Good job agents. Be more aware next time and maybe you can catch this before it happens again."
Gary and R logged out. Bro began shutting down the mainframe system.
Bro: "That was easy."
Blond: "Too easy. They'll attack again."
Slender: "How do you know?"
Blond: "Trust me. I've dealt with these things before."
The effects of General Lorn's Squarium attack on the Puffalian awaiting fleet was felt immediately. Puffalian aggression along Juno River eventually snuffed out. This was the Allies' chance to make a comeback. General Broseph rallied his troops for an important talk.
Broseph: "Men, our heroes in the skies have given us a blessing that we cannot miss. I believe it is time to fight back and push the Puffalians out of Antarctica. It is time for us to liberate the rest of New Delphis!"
"HURRAH!"
General Broseph's rally cry was immensely popular. Immediately, reinforcements came flowing in, and the mines along Juno River were disabled. Soon enough, troops were flooding across the river, as well were tanks and artillery. The allies slowly but surely began to blitzkrieg themselves south, capturing Puffalians and precious landmass. By nighttime, allied forces had reached Merchants, while other army groups were capturing areas around the city. Citizens within Merchants began uprising against the Puffalian occupation, as Shopper and Culldrom paratroopers dropped down from above. By the next morning, the city was seized, and the allies had steamrolled the Puffalians all the way back to Gates, where the New Delphian front had opened up.
"The operation failed."
Hans: "What do you mean the operation failed?"
Heinz: "Feey1 and Victor Malkov were unable to takeover the systems."
Hans: "Then do it again! And this time send in more bots, got it?"
Heinz: "Umm..."
Hans: "We must take down those forsaken allies before they're the death of us. For Benny's sake!"
Heinz: "..."
Hans: "Do it NOW!"
"NOW!"
"NOW!"
Heinz had enough of Hans' ranting and he exited the room to go tell Feey1 and Victor Malkov about Hans' orders.
- "RED ALERT. RED ALERT. RED ALERT. HEAVY ENEMY VIRAL ATTACK UNDERWAY. INITIATE ALL AVAILABLE MAINFRAME DEFENSES."
"Not again!"
Bro, Slender and Jimmy Blond were caught off guard by an incoming enemy viral attack. Bro rushed to the controls and saw that bots were already flooding into the mainframe; countless numbers of every kind. He set up as many cannons as he could to protect the system's core. At the same time, agent Blond got Gary and R on the line.
Gary (COMM): "Agents! What's going on!"
Slender (COMM): "No time to talk, G! We're under attack!"
R (COMM): "I'll try to shut down their commun-*bzzzk*"
Gary (COMM): "R, what's going on-*bzzzk*"
Bro: "What happened?"
Blond: "We lost them. I'll try to-"
Feey1 (COMM): "Hello, Elite Penguin Failures!"
Bro (COMM): "So wow. Such original. Much creative."
Feey1 (COMM): "Shut up, Bro! I hope you realize I've already taken down the USA's, Munijoch's, and Puffle'and's EPF mainframes already!"
Slender (COMM): "That means we were just a distraction!"
Feey1 (COMM): "That's right! You won't stop me this time!"
Blond: "Hold on! I'll try to refresh the system and disconnect him!"
Feey1 (COMM): "You won't stop me this time! Say goodbye, Axle Powers, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"
All of a sudden, huge waves of bots flew in to the mainframe. It was too overwhelming for the cannons, and they got to the mainframe core. The core crumbled and collapsed, making the system defender machine shut down with a message.
- "ERROR. SYSTEM OVERLOAD AND COLLAPSE. TERMINATING PROGRAM."
The deed was done; the EPF mainframe was compromised and destroyed. Feey1 and the Puffalians also went on to completely destroy the SIA's internal computer systems. The allies now had no useful forms of communications, except for Ed Island (whose electronics were too advanced) and the Culldrome Isles (whose electronics were too antique). Without communications and software, the allied war effort was good-for-nothing, and they knew it. This Axis victory would cost the allies dearly.
Chapter Seven: Downfall
With their mainframes shut down, both the EPF and the SIA went into utter chaos and panic. At the SIA Headquarters in Southern Shops, agents tried to reboot the server, only to make the situation worse with every try. In the EPF, their agents were able to construct a small but ineffective backup server, which was only capable of maintaining the most important things; none of which were military.
In the EPF headquarters in Munijoch, Bro, Slender and Jimmy Blond were trying to salvage what they could. Agent Blond tried to reboot their end of the server, but nothing happened.
Bro: "Is it working?"
Blond: "No."
Slender: "Can you salvage it?"
Blond: "I doubt it."
Bro: "Do you think WhiteBlood's computers were shut down, too? Feey1 said that he took down all of Munijoch's stuff after all."
Blond: "No. He meant the good part of Munijoch. I'm sure the WhiteBlood technology is still intact."
BOOM
Slender: "What was that?"
Blond: "WhiteBlood. They found us."
Bro: "How?"
Blond: "Don't ask me! They probably tracked our signal or something when our network crashed. Follow me."
The three agents went into the weapons room. Agent Blond told Bro and Slender to grab everything they could and to throw it into their inventories. So, the three of them rummaged through guns, grenades and other weapons, putting them in their inventories for later use.
BOOM
Suddenly, another explosion was heard. The WhiteBlood extremists had broken into the EPF base.
"Your jig is up, EPF Agents! Put your flippers up and come out towards us slowly!"
Slender: "Screw this."
Slender grabbed a grenade. He pulled the pin and threw it at the System Defender machine.
BOOM
The machine blew up, and so did the wall behind it. The three agents escaped through the collapsed wall, as Bro and agent Blond fired their guns through the weapons room, trying to hit WhiteBloods. They ran away from the building, as a depth charge that Bro set up exploded within the structure. The agents ran out into the streets, making their way from the enemy.
Slender: "Where do we go from now?"
Bro: "This place is a major port for ships coming from the Finipines. They're a Castillan colony. We can probably get on board the ship and we'll seek asylum before heading back to Shops."
Blond: "Good enough plan. Let's make our run for it."
Bro, Slender and Agent Blond dashed through the streets, rushing towards the port. They broke through the port's gates and made their way to the loading docks, where giant gantry cranes loomed over the horizon, loading huge container ships.
Bro: "That one over there has a Finipino flag on it."
Slender: "How will we get onto it?"
Blond: "This is just another day at the office. Follow me, boys."
The three agents ran underneath one of the gantry cranes, and hopped onto a large cargo container. As the crane locked onto the container, the three agents were hoisted into the air. The container swung around in the air, and the three penguins held on the best they could. When the container was rested down onto the ship, they hopped off, jumping through the numerous rows of containers, heading towards the bridge. When they eventually got there, the captain and his shipmates immediately put their flippers up.
Captain: "Please! Don't hurt us! We'll do anything!"
Bro: "We're not here to hurt you. We're agents of the EPF and the SIA. We need asylum, as we're fleeing this place."
Captain: "Why? I thought Shops and the USA were friends with Munijoch?"
Bro: "Yes, but WhiteBlood has almost completely taken over this place. We need you to take us to your port of call in the Finipines. We'll pay you forward afterwards."
Captain: "Hmmm... Sure. We'll provide you accommodations. A friend of Castilla is a friend of ours, after all!"
Bro: "Thanks a lot. We appreciate it."
The Finipino ship crew was delighted to assist their allies. The three agents were given a decent cabin below the bridge to sleep in for the night; the voyage to the Finipines would only take a few days.
On the New Delphian front, the allies had felt the effects of the electronic shut down almost immediately. They had resorted to trench warfare with the Puffalians. But, they had no air support and were working in total radio silence. General Lorn's air force squadrons were grounded in Polaris, while General Broseph's forces could do no more than stand in defiance of the inevitable odds stacked against them. Broseph was laying in a trench, tending to wounded soldiers when a messenger came over to him.
Messenger: "Sir, we have reports of incoming attacks in approximately two-"
BOOM
Broseph: "Two hours? Those blasts were your incoming attacks."
Messenger: "Crap."
Broseph: "You can stay in these trenches. But I'm afraid we might not be able to hold out much longer."
From above the trench, the sound of a roaring engine was heard. It grew increasingly louder as it neared the trench. Broseph used a periscope to peer above the trench. He saw a Puffalian bomber coming right for them.
Broseph: "INCOMING BOMBER! DUCK AND COVER!"
Everyone in the trench stopped what they were doing and took cover. The bomber flew above the allied lines and unleashed havoc.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
The bombs exploded, killing many of the allied soldiers in the trench. Many others were splattered and covered in dirt and debris. Broseph made his way through the burning ruins, trying to find other generals. Suddenly, Puffalian troops crossed no-man's land and jumped into the allied trench. They opened fire on the allied soldiers. Broseph pulled out his two pistols and fired back at them.
Broseph, after fighting the Puffalian troops the best he could, jumped out the back of the trench and made a beeline away from the chaos, and towards a safe command center. When he arrived there, he asked to call General Lorn.
Broseph: "Where's the phone? I need to call someone."
Operator: "I'm sorry general, but all our communications are knocked out."
Broseph: "Crap. The krauts hacked us worse than I thought."
Operator: "You look tired. Would you care if we fixed you up?"
Broseph: "That sounds nice."
The operator called some nurses, who got Broseph and laid him down in a bed, where he fell asleep. It was hard though, as he could still hear the ringing of explosions off in the distance, coupled with the unending rounds of gunfire.
Bro, Slender, and Jimmy Blond had arrived in the Finipino port of Maybila. They got off the ship, as the sun's rays penetrated the docks, making the situation uncomfortable for the agents. The Finipines were very different from anything Bro had seen before; it was much more tropical.
Bro: "I don't like this place. Where are we going next?"
Blond: "If you can get us onto a Shopper ship, that would be great."
Bro: "Does Shops even trade with the Finipines?"
Slender: "Of course! They trade with everyone."
The three agents made their way down the pier, until they came across a ship with Moon Islandian markings on it.
Bro: "Close enough."
Bro, Slender and Agent Blond hopped on a cargo container and were again lifted into the belly of the Moon Islandian ship, just as they had done in Munijoch. Slender was quick to persuade the captain to give the agents asylum, stating that they were on an important mission. Later that day, the Moon Islandian ship left port and sailed towards Shops Island.
As General Broseph recuperated, he was transported further north, all the way to Big House. The Puffalians had completely stopped the allied advances, and were now advancing back through their formerly occupied territory. It took merely hours for the Puffalians to push the allies all the way past Juno River. Throughout the next few days, the allied forces were pushed all the way up the New Delphian coast, all the way to Rivers. It took a few days to capture Leopold, but eventually it fell, too. It seemed as if the allies were no longer able to stomach a fight. In southern New Delphis, Hans Traugott landed in Gates, which was now firmly in Axis hands.
Hans: "Excellent. Excellent! I knew we would win this war, but never so easily!"
Hans was driven through the streets of Gates. However, he was not receiving the fanfare he expected. As he was driven through the city center, crowds booed, hollered and hissed at their new master. Most protesters were silenced by Puffalian troops, but the occupation was still visibly uncomfortable. Hans soon arrived at the city's grand hall, which was under reconstruction. He went into the giant hall chambers, where other Puffalian diplomats were there to meet him. They all stood up and saluted their leader as he entered the room.
Adviser: "Mein Vorsitzende, what is your bidding?"
Hans: "I want New Delphis to fall by next week. We can then start our assault on our next target."
Adviser: "And that is?"
Hans: "You'll see. They'll all see..."
Hans gave out an evil cackle of laughter, subsequently coughing up a storm. He continued to laugh, however, and his advisers joined in.
MWAHAHAHAHAHA
With Munijoch's heroic agents long gone, the nation seemed on the brink of capitulation and on the brink of a return to WhiteBlood rule. But, there were some who would have none of it. Out of the shadows came president Yslenski. He was toting his sub-machine gun, ready for a fight. His eyes were deformed, glowing red as he was in the fifth stage of his "Fallen Gladiator" state; not many penguins were able to live a fight with Joseph in this status. As Joseph tiptoed down the shadowy hallways of a wrecked building in Rio De Vatica. As he waddled down the halls, the lights flickering above him, he came to the end of the hallway, where there was an intricate oak double-door, seemingly intact compared to the rest of the building. Joseph loaded his gun and slowly opened the doors.
"Ah, mister Yslenski! Good to see you!"
Joseph: "YOU!"
In the room behind the doors was Joseph's old enemy, and none other than WhiteBlood leader Victor Malkov. He was sitting at the end of a solid oak table, with a blue lightsaber beside him.
Joseph: "A lightsaber? Are you a Sith now?"
Victor: "No my friend, I just have connections!"
Joseph: "They can't help you now. FOR MUNIJOCH!"
Joseph fired his gun at Malkov, but the shots were deflected by Victor's lightsaber. Victor jumped out of his chair and flew into the air, coming right close to Joseph. Joseph kept firing, but had his gun sliced in two by his opponent. Victor now started to make wild swings at Joseph, while Joseph bent backwards, ducked, jumped, and everything in between to avoid the lightsaber blade. As Victor pushed Joseph back towards the doors, Joseph saw a ceremonial Electro Staff. He lunged at it and picked it up, only for it to turn on. He immediately engaged Victor in a duel now that he had a weapon to match a lightsaber.
Joseph: "Feeling lucky, buddy?"
Victor: "Very!"
The two kept exchanging blows to each other. Unlike most lightsaber battles, this one was fast paced and both of them were moving around quickly. They jockeyed into the main hallway, which they laid waste to as their battle got more and more heated. Victor was able to make a slice at Joseph's belly, although it was not fatal.
Joseph: "AGH!"
Joseph was able to keep in the fight despite his injury. Now, he was angrier than he had ever been before. He let out the entirety of his rage on Victor. Joseph kicked Victor in the face, sending the latter flying out a stain-glass window, to the ground below.
THUMP
"RAAAAHHH!!!"
Victor landed on the ground, and Joseph also jumped out towards the ground in pursuit. Joseph had his Electro Staff in a position to stab Victor in the heart, but Victor was agile and was able to grab his lightsaber to deflect Joseph's thrust. Victor jumped up; both of them were back on their feet again and the battle was only getting more intense. Their fight moved onto a half-destroyed bridge, as Joseph started to gain the upper hand. Victor was pushed onto the edge of the bridge, where Joseph kicked him again, sending Victor into a river below. However, Victor was saved by a boat underneath. Joseph also jumped down, and was able to stab Victor in the heart with his Electro Staff.
AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Huge surges of electricity lit up Victor like a Christmas Tree. Joseph thrusted the staff even deeper in, until Victor's eyes raveled up into their sockets and smoke started to fume out of his clothes. Victor was as good as dead. Joseph picked up Victor's corpse and threw it overboard, and the body immediately sank to the bottom of the river.
On the Moon Islandian ship headed for Moon Island, the weather turned for the worse. Thunder clouds loomed overhead, and the crackling of thunder was soon abound. Soon, torrential rains opened up from the heavens and the seas turned into a cesspool of crashing waves. The ship rocked from bow-to-stern, port-to-starboard, and all over again. Aboard the ship, the agents were trying to not take notice of it.
Bro: "Ughhh... I feel seasick..."
Blond: "If you feel seasick don't puke here."
Bro: "Okay bye."
Bro ran out of the room and rushed onto the deck, where he unleashed his payload, to say the least.
Slender: "What's wrong with him?"
BOOM
Out of nowhere, a giant explosion rocked the ship even more. A shockwave rang through the hall, hurting everyone's ears. Bro ran out from the deck and back into the cabin.
Bro: "What was that?"
Blond: "I don't know. Let's go."
Jimmy Blond rushed Bro and Slender out of the room and they went onto the deck. As they looked down the length of the ship, they saw a fire erupting.
Blond: "Torpedoes. We have to get out of here."
Puffalian U-Boats still hunted the Antarctic waters, and were still preying on Axle Powers'-affiliated merchant vessels. Their ship had been hit, and was going down fast. Agent Blond rushed himself and his friends to the lifeboats, where they were lowered into the sea. Their cargo ship soon split in two and sunk to the bottom of the ocean.
Bro: "Great. This is the last thing we need right now."
Amid the rising doubts that the allies could ever turn the tides of the war, president Lavender was en route to Polaris City, on board a Culldrome jet. He was going to talk to president Nathaniel B. Kratz about Polaris helping the allies. When he touched down, he was brought to the Polaris Harborfront Center. Lavender went up to the 116th floor, where president Kratz's office was.
Kratz: "Good day to you Mr. Lavender. Be seated."
President Kratz beckoned Lavender into his office, and the Shopper President took a seat on an ornate leather sofa.
Kratz: "I understand that you've come to ask for my help in this raging war."
Lavender: "Yes."
Kratz: "Our Congress and the Executive Administrative Council are worried. The stability of New Delphis is indispensable to our economy--we cannot allow the investments of our people to be plundered by these assailants. Our military forces are formidable, they are an eager fighting force."
Lavender: "What's your point, Kratz?"
Kratz: "I'd be willing to engage our forces in this gruesome war. The Council passed a resolution the evening prior that would permit for the mobilization of troops into New Delphis and along the border."
Lavender: "Great!"
Lavender got up to shake Kratz's flipper, but was motioned to sit back down before he could.
Kratz: "I'd be willing to join your meager skirmish, but, what's in it for my nation?"
Lavender: "Money."
Kratz: "That's what you promised Snowiny a while back."
Lavender: "Okay, you can have more military autonomy too once this is all over."
Kratz: "Perhaps not. There is something else I have in mind."
Lavender: "Victory. That I can promise."
Kratz: "Alright. Your offer suffices for the time being. Note this, however: if we are unprovoked, you receive none of our support."
Lavender: "Whatever."
President Kratz and Lavender got up and shook each others' flippers. The Axle Powers now had another powerful ally on their side.
With his air force grounded, General Lorn had nothing to do. At the time, he was in rural Barrett, Polaris, and he had just heard about Polaris joining the allies. So, he appealed to a military base nearby to see if there was anything he and his Hawk Squadron could do.
Lorn: "Hello? Anyone here?"
A Polarian general came up to greet him.
Polarian: "Hello. Are you a Shopper?"
Lorn: "Yes. I'm the commander of the Shopper Air Force."
Polarian: "Let me see your identification."
General Lorn pulled out his ID card and handed it to the Polarian general.
Polarian: "All right. State your purpose, sir."
Lorn: "My squadron, or pretty much the entire air force, needs something to do."
Polarian: "Hmm... Well... we can't give you any aircraft to pilot. But, there is another project we could use help in."
Lorn: "And that is?"
Polarian: "The government is constructing a major defensive line on the southern Polarian border to keep the Puffalians out. We can use all the help we can get. It's called the Escargot Line."
Lorn: "Well, my pilots aren't exactly the best at building fortifications, but we can provide muscle for you."
Polarian: "Excellent. Thank you. You can go anywhere along the southern border and you'll probably find one of our officers."
Lorn: "Thanks, will do."
General Lorn left the military base, to alert his air force that they had a new task. The Escargot Line was a peculiar proposal, but it was a better thing to devote manpower to than nothing at all.
As time passed, the Puffalians blitzkrieg became evermore daunting and treacherous. They had steamrolled the entirety of both the Leopold and Mercannias districts of New Delphis, and were now ready to gobble up the last district; Delfino. The Puffalians were quick to besiege and conquer Golden Shore, meeting almost no resistance in the process. The allied armies had fallen back to Sunset City and were ready to defend the city to the end. However, many Shopper and Munian troops were already being moved back behind Polaris' borders as to deter any more of their suffering. Most of the forces in Sunset City were Culldrom and Ed Islandian troops, considering neither of their mainframes were hacked. But, neither country was willing to put their space fleet on the line after what happened last time. Regardless, the city was well fortified. General Broseph was in charge of defense, as he perched himself out of a window in one of the city's tallest skyscrapers, equipped with a rocket launcher, and a clear view of the ocean.
Broseph: "Rocket launcher, plus good view, plus me, equals success!"
With Broseph was General Roberts, leader of the Culldrom armed forces.
Roberts: "This will be easy."
Out of the distance, into the bay, the two generals saw a massive armada of Puffalian ships approaching. As battalions closed in on the other side of the city, there were also forces invading from the sea.
Broseph: "Ready... Aim... FIRE!"
FWOOSH
Broseph fired his rocket launcher which hit a Puffalian warship smack in the middle of the hull. The ship soon sunk to the bottom of the bay. But, Broseph's attack did not go unnoticed. Puffalian ships started firing on the skyscraper Broseph and Roberts were in. The structure shook heavily.
Roberts: "I have a bad feeling about this... I think we should get outta here."
Broseph: "Nonsense! This is the best sniper perch in the history of ever! It'd be ridiculous to-"
BOOM
Suddenly, a Puffalian missile launched from a ship and exploded into the lower floors of the skyscraper. The building shook wildly, before it started collapsing down to the ground. It crunched its way down, with smoke and dust billowing from the bottom floors up. The top stories of the building then started to shear off, and it broke off and listed to one side. Broseph and Roberts were thrown to the other side of the room as their section of the giant skyscraper was in free-fall mode.
CRASH
The section of the skyscraper that Broseph and Roberts was in smashed into the ground, sending debris flying in every which direction. Luckily, Broseph and Roberts survived but both were severely injured. The Puffalians laid waste to the entire bay area of the city, trashing every skyscraper, and killing almost every allied soldier in the process, as most allied soldiers had situated themselves near skyscrapers. Dust and smoke rose into the air in thick and toxic plumes, these towers of peril were able to be seen for hundreds of miles around.
"Hello! Is anyone home?"
Near the southern border between Polaris and New Delphis, General Lorn and other members of the Shopper Air Force arrived at a military-looking building. Lorn sent out a yell, and he was answered. A military officer of the Polarian army came out.
Polarian: "Ahh, General Lorn. We've been expecting you. Right this way."
The officer escorted General Lorn and his cronies into the large building, where they were given safety equipment and loaded into a bus. After a five minute ride, they arrived at a scene swarming with construction equipment all around. Towering cranes vaulted into the skies, as giant steel wire forms rose in front of them, serving as the skeleton for an impregnable wall of concrete and steel. On trains, slabs of the structure came and were hoisted into place, along with numerous land mines, anti-tank obstructions, not to mention the massive gun emplacements put on top of the towering structure.
Lorn: "Wow..."
Polarian: "You betcha. This is the main wall of a large defensive line. It's absolutely impenetrable!"
Lorn: "Unless of course, you were to be outmaneuvered."
Polarian: "Maybe, but that won't happen. Follow me."
The Polarian officer led Lorn and the other air force members into an office trailer. As they piled in, the Polarian pulled out a blueprint. It showed where the main fortifications were. In front of it was two miles of pure lands mines, gun and sniper turrets, and obstructions to prevent tanks from pushing through. Never in the history of Antarctica had such a defensive structure been built before.
Lorn: "Hmmm... Impressive."
Polarian: "Thank you. Now, would you like to know your duties?"
Lorn: "Of course."
All of the air force members and General Lorn were given their respective jobs, and they went right to work, assisting in building the Escargot Line.
After their ship was sunk, Bro, Slender and Jimmy Blond were picked up by patrolling UAN naval vessels, along with the crew, and were taken to Dancing Penguin City. The crew went to the shipping terminals to speak to their bosses, while the trio of agents went to a hotel near the port. The hotel was unique; it was ten stories tall, and only had rooms placed along the outside of the building. The rest of the hotel was opened up completely, with a sun-shield shining through the roof. The floor of the open space was luxurious. Exotic plants were all around, there were bars, a coffee shop, a restaurant, and a lazy river lining the floor. Slender and agent Blond went to their room on the top floor, while Bro went to the snack bar to get something to eat.
Bro: "Yes, I'll have some popcorn please."
Waiter: "Very well, sir."
The waiter left Bro's table to ring in his order. Meanwhile, some penguins approached Bro. They were in black hoodies and had block toques on.
Bro: "What do you want?"
Penguin: "You're coming with us!"
Bro: "Like heck I-"
Bro was silenced and grabbed by two of the black-cloaked penguins. These penguins turned out to be Puffalian agents. Bro pulled out his radio and called for help.
Bro (COMM): "HELP! HELP! I'M BEING KIDNAPPED!"
From their room, Slender and Blond heard Bro's transmission loud and clear. They burst out of their room, guns loaded, and barged out into the open corridor on the tenth floor. It was open, with a clear view of the area Bro was. They spotted him being dragged out, and shots were fired.
BANG BANG BANG
Slender and Blond split up, still firing at the Puffalian agents. The Puffalians also began to shot back, and one of them shot Bro in the torso, and he collapsed immediately afterwards. The two agents kept firing upon the Puffalians until all the agents were dead. They then paid the front desk a hefty bribe and took Bro to the hospital.
From his office, president Lavender was watching a TV broadcast. Sunset City had surrendered. The news became widespread almost immediately. As Lavender watched his broadcast, his wife Violet came in.
Lavender: "Simply unbelievable."
Violet: "Chin up, honey. There's still hope."
Lavender: "Yes, I suppose. But now we have nowhere to fight back..."
Meanwhile, at the Escargot line, construction was complete. General Lorn was now busy in getting all Culldrom and Ed Islandian troops safely into Polarian territory, now that New Delphis had fallen. Through his sights, he saw two gurneys covered in cloth being rushed through the traffic; they looked important. Lorn rushed over to them to see what they were.
Lorn: "Who's under this fabric?"
Nurse: "It's nothing important, sir."
Lorn: "Let me see."
Nurse: "But-"
Lorn: "LET ME SEE!"
General Lorn ripped the sheets off of the two gurneys and he saw General Broseph and General Roberts laying in them.
Lorn: "Oh dear."
Nurse: "Yes, now if you excuse me, we must get these men to hospital!"
The nurse rushed off with Broseph and Roberts, sending them to a hospital to recover. At the same time, however, as allied troops rushed past the Escargot Line, the Puffalians were in close pursuit.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
Lorn: "What was that!?"
General Lorn ran out from the troop-moving-zone, up to one of the guard towers where a Polarian general was. The Polarians in the lines began to counter-fire on the Puffalians.
Lorn: "What's going on?"
Polarian General: "The Puffalians are attacking."
Lorn: "Do you think we can handle it?"
Polarian General: "Of course. We have superior firepower."
BOOM BOOM
The Puffalians continued to hammer the Escargot line, but with little effect. The Polarians fired back ruthlessly, eventually keeping the Puffalian forces at bay, and causing them to ceasefire.
After Bro had recovered from his injuries in the hospital, he, Slender, and Jimmy Blond were taken to the Dancing Penguin City Hall. There to meet them was president Lavender.
Lavender: "Hello, boys! It seems you ran into some trouble?"
Blond: "We achieved our objective."
Lavender: "Oh, did you? I was told that President Yslenski did the dirty work for you three."
Slender: "So Lavender, how's your wife going?"
Lavender: "Shut up, you know she'll never be yours."
Bro: "Hey Lavender, when was the last time we met again?"
Lavender: "At my inauguration I believe."
Bro: "Of course. Well, our job is done. Anything you suggest we do now?"
Slender: "Go have some fun, obviously!"
Lavender: "Whatever. You're both just boys with some big toys. Go enjoy yourselves."
Blond: "Count me out. I need to head back to Puffle'and."
Lavender: "Have a nice trip then."
Blond: "Bye."
Jimmy Blond left the room, later going off to catch a flight back to Puffle'and. Bro and Slender went back to their hotel to spend the night; they would go enjoy themselves the next day.
Hans Traugott had finished his tour of his conquered New Delphis. He was now back at his palace in Puffalia, but was not yet aware of the Puffalian defeat at the Escargot Line. Heinz waddled into Hans' office to brief the Puffalian leader on the current situation.
Heinz: "Our attack on the Polarian lines failed. It seems impregnable."
Hans: "What do you mean we failed? Find a better plan, then! For fish's sake, we're better than this! If I wanted to lose I would have allied with the Ligurians! Go draw up a better plan NOW!"
Hans got up from his chair and started banging on his desk.
"NOW!"
"NOW!"
"NOW!"
Heinz: "Yes sir."
Heinz left the office and rushed his way down the ornate staircases of the building, which linked Hans' offices and personal quarters to the main floors. Heinz went deep into the basement of the palace, and stepped into a room where there were a bunch of generals. It was the palace's war room. It had a map of Antarctica on the wall, with all of Puffalia's conquered areas highlighted in red. All of the generals, including others such as Feey1 and Victor Malkov, were huddled around a table with a map of the USA on it.
Sven: "Yes? What is it?"
Heinz: "Our Vorsitzende is expecting results. He wants you to find a better plan, Herr Olaf."
Sven: "Well, tell him that we're in the midst of making the best invasion plan ever! Now go."
Heinz: "What? Invading the USA?"
Sven: "If you want to think about it that way, yes."
Heinz: "Okay then."
Heinz left the war room, although he was still unconvinced of Sven's actual intentions, since an invasion of the USA at this point seemed sketchy and risky at best. But, he went with it and told Hans about the generals' plans in-the-making.
Now that their missions were complete for the time being, Bro and Slender headed south to Wizzint. Wizzint was a city that was quickly growing in popularity, especially with the eyes of the world now on Shops Island during the war. Bro and Slender booked themselves into one of the most expensive and luxurious hotels there; they had separate rooms. They spent a few days there to recuperate from their experiences in Munijoch.
In his office, Hans and Sven were overlooking plans for the invasion that Heinz had intruded on.
Hans: "Do you have the map?"
Sven: "Ja. Here it is."
Sven pulled out a map and laid it down on Hans' desk.
Sven: "Behold, our next target, Polaris!"
Hans: "Very well; I admire your courage my friend. Such a task like this seems difficult. What's your plan?"
Sven: "You see these numbers? They're each part of the plan. Let me explain it for you:"
1: Launch an aerial and naval attack on the Escargot line, which provokes the Allies.
2: The Allies will respond by sending overwhelming troop numbers to the line to defend it.
3: We will push through the Great Forest of Eastshield and cut the allies off from the rest of Polaris. The Allies think that the Great Forest is impenetrable to tanks, therefore there should be little resistance through that route.
4: Polarian networks will be hacked and shut down, we can then conquer all of Polaris.
"So, what do you think?"
Hans: "It seems that you spent quite some time plotting this."
Sven: "I have."
Hans: "Well, this plan is excellent. You have my permission to start the invasion as soon as possible."
Sven: "Danke sir. I will rally our troops immediately."
The next day, Puffalian bombers took off from Sunset City and headed towards the Escargot Line. Along the coast, Puffalian warships readied themselves for a bombardment of the lines. At 430 hours that morning, the silence was broken and guns were fired.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
As warships pounded the Escargot Line, bombers overhead caused mass confusion as their bombs targeted strategic areas long the line. As the explosives rained down upon the fortifications, General Lorn was awoken by the sounds of explosives all over the place.
Lorn: "What's going on!?"
Commander: "Sir, the Puffalians are attacking!"
Lorn: "Just my luck. Get General Broseph on the line."
Commander: "As you wish."
The commander ran out and came back with a phone in hand. On the other line was General Broseph, who was recovering quickly in a hospital in Vanceton.
Lorn (PHONE): "Hello?"
Broseph (PHONE): "Hi. What's the matter?"
Lorn (PHONE): "The krauts are attacking our lines!"
Broseph (PHONE): "We all saw it coming, buddy. I'll be there as soon as I can."
Lorn (PHONE): "Are you fit enough to do it?"
Broseph (PHONE): "Of course. I'll be with you soon."
Broseph closed his connection, leaving General Lorn hanging. For the time being, he could do nothing except watch the raid ongoing in horror.
As the raid took place, all the allied leaders (Lavender, Steven Snowen, Joseph Yslenski, EDFan12345, Spike Hike, Nathaniel B. Kratz) were quickly informed on what was happening. All of them unanimously agreed to send the entirety of their forces to the Escargot line to counter the Puffalian attack; something the Allies were confident that they were capable of doing. By the end of the day, all Allied forces had gathered in the Escargot Line, and the Puffalian attacks began to weaken.
Fighting raged through the night. As casualties mounted and all attention was drawn towards the Escargot line, Sven prepared his forces ready to cut through the Great Forest. Their plans were to seize Snowville by nighttime. From safely in New Delphis, his tanks warmed up as dawn slipped above Earth, bringing light to everything. As engines roared, the next stage of the Puffalian Blitzkrieg was underway.
Sven (COMM): "We are underway, General. We should be through the Great Forest and well into Barrett by noon. Do you copy?"
General (COMM): "I hear you General Olaf. Over."
By noon, Sven's tank columns had surely reached the border with Polaris and stopped there to wait for the infantry to catch up.
RING RING RING
"Ugg... Hello?"
From his bed, Bro got up to answer his icePhone. On the line was Gary the Gadget Guy.
Gary: "Agent, this is urgent!"
Bro: "Yes?"
Gary: "We've detected waves of bots ready to attack the Polarian computer mainframes."
Bro: "Well that's bad."
Gary: "That's not even the worst news! The Puffalians have already invaded Polaris and are ready to cut our forces off!"
Bro: "Crap. I'll get to a mainframe as soon as possible."
Gary: "Where are you?"
Bro: "Wizzint."
Gary: "There are no EPF headquarters in Moon Island as of now, unfortunately... I will teleport you and Slender to my headquarters."
Bro: "Thanks."
Gary got out his EPF Phone and established a connection with Bro's icePhone and Slender's phone elsewhere. Both of them were teleported out of Wizzint and found themselves in Club Penguin Island's EPF Command Room within seconds.
FWOOSH
Slender: "What's this all about?"
Gary: "No time to talk, agents. Get onto the System Defender and intercept those bots!"
Bro rushed over to the System Defender Machine and connected into the Polarian mainframe. However, he seemed too late, the mainframe was already severely damaged and bots were flowing in en masse. Bro desperately spread out some guns to counter the bots' influx.
Feey1 (COMM): "Well well well, look who's finally arrived!"
Bro (COMM): "You won't win this time, Feey1!"
Victor Malkov (COMM): "Oh really?"
Slender (COMM): "Victor Malkov? I thought president Yslenski killed you!"
Victor (COMM): "Shut up, fool!"
Feey1 (COMM): "Prepare to be eliminated again, Shopper Imbecilic Atrocities!"
Victor (COMM): "Yes! So long Elite Penguin Fools!"
Suddenly, Victor and Feey1 unleashed a devastating "centipede of doom" of boss bots into the mainframe, pushing through Bro's bug-destroying-gun emplacements and making it to the fragile mainframe with ease. It sparked and shuttered, before blowing up. The screen of the System Defender machine then went black, but not before a message popped up onto the screen.
Meanwhile, the Puffalian attacks on the Escargot Line began to ease. At the same time, General Broseph had arrived at the scene, now ready for a fight.
Broseph: "Ha! Those kraut cowards ran away they second they saw me coming!"
Lorn: "Yeah, you keep saying that. We have worse things on our backs now."
Broseph: "Like?"
Lorn: "Let's see... The Puffalians have invaded Barrett, Polaris' computer mainframes are down,
Broseph: "...Oh."
Lorn: "Yeah."
Broseph: "Let's send our forces out to intercept them!"
Lorn: "Our Shopper and Munian forces have their networks knocked out, remember?"
Broseph: "Well then send in the Culldrom and Ed Islandian spacecraft to intercept them!"
Lorn: "Neither of them are willing to sacrifice their spacecraft again."
Broseph: "Crap. Well, we'll just send a task force to intercept their advance."
Lorn: "Do whatever you want. I have a feeling we've already lost, though."
The Puffalians had reached Snowville District's borders by sunset. General Olaf transmitted his bi-hourly status report to Puffalian command in the homeland.
"It is sunset now. We have moved into Snowville District and should close the gap in a few hours. Over."
By midnight, sure enough, the Puffalians had closed the gap and had reached Snoville; they had cut off the allied armies from everything else.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
The allied armies were interrupted from their sleeps the next morning by the sounds of bombs dropping from the skies. General Broseph and Lorn woke up with a start, as a messenger rushed into their tent to give them the update.
Messenger: "Sirs, the Puffalians have reached the coast! We're cut off from all incoming resources."
Lorn: "This is bad..."
Broseph: "Where's the task force I sent out to puncture their advancement lines?"
Messenger: "General Roberts sent a heavy battalion to try and cut through the advance but he failed, sir. The Puffalians are now splitting up and closing in on us."
Broseph: "Do we have any other options?"
Messenger: "I don't know. I'm no military strategist."
Broseph: "Okay. You are dismissed."
Messenger: "Yes sir."
The Messenger left the room. In the distances, the landscape was set ablaze by firebombs and napalms dropped by the Puffalians. With their hopes slipping away by the second, Broseph turned to his friend for advice.
Broseph: "Do you have any suggestions?"
Lorn: "I can't think of any alternative other than surrender."
Broseph: "We can't do that! We'll look like buffoons!"
Lorn: "Well, we could try to evacuate."
Broseph: "What do you mean?"
Lorn: "We could evacuate our troops via ships and get them to the Juno Islands for safety."
Broseph: "Hmmm... seems risky. But I like your thinking. It's a deal."
Out on the ocean, Captain Swaggins and his fleet was stationed in a Munian port. They were doing nothing at the time, but their peace was broken by an incoming transmission. Although most Shopper and Munian communications were knocked out by the Puffalians, old-fashioned comm techniques such as Morse Code machines and handheld radios were still operational.
Swaggins: "What does the message say?"
Commander: "It says..."Captain Swaggins, we need your fleet on the shores near the Escargot Line ASAP! We're launching a full-scale evacuation! The Puffalians outflanked us and we're being pushed further towards the sea." What do you think?"
Swaggins: "It's a trap!"
Commander: "What? It can't be!"
Swaggins: "Why don't you think it's a trap!? Broseph would never give up like that!"
Commander: "I'm pretty sure he has his reasons, sir."
Swaggins: "I'm not landing our ships on the beach when we risk sabotage. We'll wait our fleet out further from the shore; the armies can find their own way to get to our ships."
Captain Swaggins was being cautious, although his predictions of an incoming trap were wrong. The naval fleet was sent out to moor over a mile off the shores of Polaris; a decision which would turn out to be fatal.
The next morning, many more Puffalian tanks and infantry had gathered in Snowville. General Olaf was faced with a decision: To head South and help eliminate the Allied armies, or to press Northwest towards Polaris City; the ultimate prize. To him, the answer was obvious.
Hans (PHONE): "Well, what is your choice?"
Sven (PHONE): "I'm going to Polaris City, naturally."
Hans (PHONE): "Fine by me. Don't mess anything up."
And with that, Sven gathered his divisions of tanks. They fired up and raced northwest, slicing through the thin opposition there was. By 10 AM he had reached the Penguville District, and it only took him another hour and a half to reach Penguville, where the tanks stopped rolling to wait for marching infantry to catch up. The tanks patrolled the city streets, violently blowing away anyone that opposed their new overlords. Sven wanted to flush out any and all opposition before striking west towards Polaris City.
"Let's go, boys! The beach isn't too much farther!"
General Broseph was leading his Squadrons to the beach on the opposite side of Kirkland, a tiny unincorporated port town where Shopper landing craft landed. Along with the Shopper armies were also the Culldrom, Ed Islandian, Polarian, and Munian armies. Moored out about a mile in the background were all of Captain Swaggins' ships, along with some smaller Culldrom and Munian ships. As allied soldiers rushed into the landing craft, Puffalian aircraft swooped overhead and dropped cluster bombs time and time again, throwing the entire scene into disarray. From the ships, Captain Swaggins saw the explosions.
Swaggins: "Puffalians! Quick, get the cannons ready!"
Commander: "But they're-"
Swaggins: "DON'T QUESTION MY LOGIC! MAN THE GUNS! OPEN FIRE ON THE ENEMY!"
Commander: "Whatever you say."
Under Captain Swaggins' orders, the cannons on the Shoppers warships and dreadnoughts went off with a bang, raining shells down upon the beach, turning some confusing disarray into total and utter chaos.
BOOM BANG BOOM
The side effects of Captain Swaggins' poor decision was felt immediately on the beach. General Broseph's landing craft was blasted to pieces by the Shopper warships; Broseph had jumped out of his craft just in time. He picked up his radio and contacted General Lorn and Roberts.
Broseph (COMM): "FRIENDLY FIRE! FRIENDLY FIRE! WE NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE, STAT!"
Lorn (COMM): "Got it."
The evacuation process began to speed up as allied troops, over a million of them, frantically tried to escape the blazing beach and reach their ships safely. Many soldiers were killed by friendly fire, while more were simply marooned to their fate on the beaches as the craft set off. By day's end, almost all the landing craft were destroyed by either friendly fire or Puffalian cluster bombs. As the number of allied landing craft diminished quickly, the Polarian high command was quick to send out an order for all civilian shallow-water craft to go assist the evacuation. The operation ended up being devastating for the allies, with them losing many ships, soldiers, and almost their entire fleet of landing craft.
In the Polaris Harborfront Center, president Nathaniel B. Kratz was getting more apprehensive by the minute. The Puffalians were on the outskirts of Polaris City and small battles were already starting to be fought.
Nathaniel: "What am I to do? I have no reinforcements and I'm bound for defeat."
Adviser: "Sir, we could transport you and the government to Puerto Elanor. We'll be safe there for now."
Nathaniel: "If we must. I'm afraid that our citizens must endure for now, but our republic shall spring back to its glory days again, eventually..."
Adviser: "That's the spirit!"
It took mere hours afterwards to send President Kratz and the entire Polarian government into exile in their territory of Puerto Elanor, well away from the Puffalian threat.
With the government gone, civilian resistance was the only thing to stop the Puffalians, but resistance was futile. The Harborfront Center fell within an hour of the government withdrawal. The Polarians cut the elevator cables on the Mountain Bay Tower to prevent Hans Traugott and the Puffalians from accessing the top of the tower. But this didn't stop the Puffalians from raising the triangle-and-swords on top. As Puffalian flags flew all around the city, the Polarian citizens could do nothing but watch in stunned horror. The final deed was done; Polaris had fallen.
The next morning, some Polarian diplomats met with some Puffalian generals to discuss the final terms of surrender. The Puffalians would take the mainland, but the Polarians would continue the fight, although heavily tuned-down, to keep the Juno Islands and their other territories in check. The Federal Republic of Polaris was dissolved and replaced with a Superiorist regime under Puffalian control, now known as the Meilor Government.
The Polarian republic and system went into exile, still ruling under their other territories. This new system was named the Free Polarian Forces.
General Broseph, Lorn, and Roberts watched the latest news report about the ordeal. They could do nothing but sit there, watching an evil empire overthrow one of Antarctica's most powerful nations as if nothing had ever happened.
Lorn: "Unbelievable."
Roberts: "Indeed. What a shame."
President Nathaniel B. Kratz soon waddled into the room where the generals were, and they consoled each other for the defeat. Soon after, Captain Swaggins was wheeled into the room. However, his presence was not appreciated.
SMASH!
General Broseph got up and violently threw Swaggins' fish bowl up against a wall, smashing it.
Broseph: "WHAT THE FLYING FISH IS WRONG WITH YOU!?!?!? DO YOU NOT KNOW WHEN TO PULL UP INTO PORT? YOU KILLED THOUSANDS OF TROOPS YOU MORON! WHAT THE HECK WERE YOU THINKING!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?"
General Lorn calmed Broseph down. The generals and president Kratz left the room and went out into a conference hall, where Mr. Kratz gave a speech about the current situation.
"Fellow Polarians, this is our darkest hour. Our republic has fought valiantly against the forces of tyranny and evil, but I see that our efforts did not suffice. We have picked a fight with a deadly menace who is deaf to the voices of justice; blind to the images of law. However, we will never flag or fail. Our new and free government shall continue what we have always fought for; justice and freedoms for all. We shall not be deterred from our motives by this faceless coward, still giving orders to his vast armies from a seat made of pure wickedness. The Puffalians shall have their comeuppance, no matter how long it may take. With our new government seat here in Puerto Elanor, we shall continue to command Puerto Elanor, the Juno Islands, Sanders Islands, and Amery Island in a campaign of freedom and awareness; we will provide aid to our friends and refuge to those fleeing from the Puffalian monster. War is a terrible plague that has swept our world too many times over. This is our war. We will fight, and our republic will not refuse a challenge from a faceless coward. We will beat them at their own game. Democracy has always prevailed in the past, and I have no doubts that it shall happen again. Thank you all."
Chapter Eight: Jungle Boogie
It was now early April.
Following the fall of Polaris, all of the Axle Powers leaders had an emergency conference in Bridgeport, Ed Island. All of the four leaders were sitting in a round-table discussion. There were many journalists huddled in the room, trying to get the shot they wanted.
Lavender: "So. Polaris has fallen. Got any ideas?"
Snowen: "As long as your networks are down, I doubt we can do anything."
Joseph: "Munijoch can't do anything with our networks down. But, we have one advantage."
Lavender: "Yes?"
Joseph: "I remember when I returned to Munijoch a week or so back, I ran into Victor Malkov. He engaged me in a duel, but luckily I won. I sent an electrical pulse through his heart and threw him into a river."
EDFan12345: "Then you didn't do a very good job. He's still alive, serf."
Joseph: "What? How?"
Lavender: "Guys, this is irrelevant. All we need to know is our next plan of action."
Snowen: "Sigh..."
Lavender: "What is it?"
Snowen: "I might as well tell you now. I've been keeping the media under wraps for a few days now on a certain issue. The Confederacy has started playing games again and I'm afraid Culldrome can't afford to fight two wars at the same time."
EDFan12345: "And?"
Snowen: "I'm going to have to honorably drop out of the war. Our own security is paramount to us right now."
Lavender: "Hmm. I understand. You are dismissed; consider all Culldrom operations in this war suspended until further notice."
Snowen: "Thank you Lavender."
President Snowen got up from his seat and waddled out of the room, although he was attacked by cameramen and journalists who wanted to get their beaks in on the latest scoop. Snowen flew back to Culldrome the next day to go to war again.
Joseph: "On that notice, Munijoch is in dire conditions, my friends. It will take time to reconstruct and finally take out WhiteBlood and whoever is behind it."
EDFan12345: "Please, we all know Victor Malkov is in charge."
Joseph: "No. He is simply a powerful puppet. But, as I was saying..."
Lavender: "Are you leaving us?"
Joseph: "Yes. I suppose. Our security and values are more important than-"
Lavender: "Fine. You can leave too. Consider your forces suspended from the present conflict until you can put your full focus on our efforts."
Joseph Yslenski also left the room, and he too was mauled by reporters wanting to get their scoop about Munijoch's current situation. Left at the round table were only president Lavender and king EDFan. Most of the reporters had stormed out to capture Steven Snowen's and Joseph Yslenski's news.
Lavender: "So, EDFan, I hope you're not leaving me any time soon?"
EDFan12345: "Not for the time being. It's either this or having to listen to Snowiny talk. Frankly, I much prefer this."
Lavender: "I don't blame you. Will you still be able to help us?"
EDFan12345: "How? With our space cruisers?"
Lavender: "Put them in reserve; Don't let them get too damaged again. As long as you can provide troops we'll be alright."
EDFan12345: "Okay then."
With Culldrome and Munijoch bowed out of the war for the time being, only Shops and Ed Island were there to stand up to the Puffalian menace.
After their brief stint in defending Polarian servers, Bro and Slender returned to Wizzint for a few days to gamble away their sorrows at the multiple casinos and luxurious resorts the city had to offer. However, they were eventually called to Camp Randy, a military base, south of Wizzint. When they arrived, a general and many other troops were there.
General: "Alright soldiers, now that you have completed your training, you are being shipped off to combat in the Frosian Islands."
The Frosian Islands was still buzzing with active Shopper military bases that were never taken over by the Puffalians, who were busier with the mainland Antarctic campaign.
General: "Puffalian reinforcements will probably arrive in the Frosian Islands any day now, so it's your job to protect our bases and liberate as much territory as you can. Good luck, soldiers."
Bro, Slender, and the other soldiers were soon put in an airplane and took off, heading northeast for the Frosian Islands.
In Malesia, another day was hastening to an end as penguins and puffles all over the country went about their business, getting home to their families. As day turned to night, one town on the east coast of Broneo Island was shook awake.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
From the skies above, bombs and missiles rained down on the town seemingly out of nowhere.
Puffalian, Zhouese, and East Pengolian fighters had taken to the skies above Malesia. They had started a firebombing campaign in this small town. At a military base nearby which was struck, a head Malesian general was amongst the chaos and called in for reinforcements on all frequencies.
Malesian General: "RED ALERT! RED ALERT! This is base Sandak! We are under attack from the air, by unknown forces! Bombs are being dropped as I speak. Help us!"
The transmission reached the airplane that Bro, Slender, and the other soldiers were in. The general of this battalion heard the transmission and told the captain to change his coordinates. He then went into the cabin to address his troops.
General: "Men, we have received reports of Axis hostility over Malesia. We are rerouting our flight and battle plans; we shall fight against the Axis in Malesia for the time being."
The general then went back in the cockpit as an air of confusion and discontent brewed in the cabin.
Slender: "What does he mean we're not fighting in the Frosian Islands?"
Bro: "We'll probably be run out of the country in a matter of days knowing our lu-"
BOOM
Out of nowhere, the military plane experienced a large explosion and banked severely to the right. A Zhouese fighter jet had launched a missile at the Shopper craft. The plane went into a total free-fall as the right wing fell off. Oxygen masks dropped from the ceiling and everyone put theirs on and braced for impact. It was eerily silent for such a panicked situation, considering all the troops were prepared for things like this. As the plane spun towards the Earth, Slender smashed his window, causing a rapid decompression.
Bro: "WHAT THE HECK MAN!? ARE YOU CRAZY?"
Slender: "No, just smart!"
Slender leaped out the window and yanked Bro out with him, who got shards of glass stuck in his feathers. They were in total free-fall without a parachute. But luckily, there was a lake out in the distance. Both penguins used their bodies to guide themselves there, and they came down slowly in a vertical sense, but very quickly. They came in and skimmed the lake surface before losing momentum and capitulating, being swept beneath the waves.
SPLASH!
They resurfaced, clothes ripped to pieces and bruised all around, just in time to see their plane tailspin and explode off in the distance.
Bro: "We really need to stop jumping out of planes. It's becoming a bad habit."
Slender: "Wimp."
With Polaris shaken from its perch, Hans Traugott arrived in the Puffalian city of Triskale. The city had made a total 180 since Christmas time; the streets were spotless and citizens were euphoric. Puffalia's conquest had raised Puffalian morale to an all-time high. Hans went to the city square to give a speech. He was greeted by deafening cheers and claps.
Hans: "Calm down, loyal citizens."
As the clapping subsided, Hans cleared his throat and looked at the crowd and cameras.
Hans: "Ladies and Gentlemen, Puffalia has achieved a marvelous feat. We have stopped the tyrannical Polarian empire from corrupting any more of Antarctica with its liberal and capitalist ideals. We shall continue our fight to crush the evils of capitalism in every corner of Antarctica, no matter what the cost may be. Nobody will stop us! Our enemies will fall one by one like dominoes. Our conquest for prosperity and power will not cease until our enemies have finished breathing our last breath. We are an empire of one thousand years – this is only the beginning, my friends! Nobody can stand in our path! PUFFALIA SHALL RULE THE WORLD!"
A wild outcry of approval was heard for the crowds. The message was eventually seen throughout Antarctica, where it mainly got negative reception.
Bro and Slender swam to dry land only to realize that they were stranded in unfamiliar territory with enemies swarming overhead and no reinforcements in sight.
Bro: "Great. We're lost."
Slender: "Never fear! I know all about Malesia!"
Bro: "No you don't."
Slender: "Yes, I do! I study Malesia for a pastime."
Bro: "Okay then. Where are we and how far is the next city?"
Slender: "We're only a few miles away from the southern shore, but there's a town called Luxon Attu a little bit east. We can go there."
Bro: "What are we waiting for?"
Slender: "It's thick jungle separating us from that city. Here, take this."
Slender went into his inventory and pulled out two machetes. He took one for himself and gave one to Bro. Then they set off, slicing their way through the thick jungle.
The Axis Forces were now landing troops on Broneo Island and had secured a good part of it. General Lorn and Broseph had received word of it and had assembled a naval fleet to go to the Strait of Malesia, which separated Broneo Island from Malé Island. They had assembled ten aircraft carriers, fifty dreadnoughts and over a hundred warships to go guard the channel and prevent Axis forces from crossing. Captain Swaggins was also there with them, as he was the one with naval expertise.
Swaggins: "Why are you here again?"
Broseph: "To make sure you don't open fire on your allies again, bonehead."
Swaggins: "Whatever."
The next day, the naval force arrived in the Malesian strait and stayed put. General Lorn prepped his aircraft for dogfights and cannons were set up to intercept enemy movements.
After an hour of preening through the jungle with their giant swords, Bro and Slender came into view of Luxon Attu. But, unfortunately, there was almost nothing there. Only a few huts and a dam. They saw a penguin working in a hut right near the river; he had a motorboat there. Bro and Slender approached him.
Slender: "Hello stranger. We come in peace."
Stranger: "Yes?"
Bro: "Can we take your boat?"
Stranger: "What? No!"
Bro: "I don't have time for this."
SHLINCK!
Without second thought, Bro killed the stranger with his machete.
Slender: "Well, that escalated quickly."
Bro: "Get in the boat."
The two penguins hopped in the motor boat and took off down the river.
Within a few hours, they had reached the larger town of Simang. However, it wasn't much better. It was stricken with poverty and everything was sub-par.
Slender: "There's nothing here either."
Bro: "Maybe we should explore a bit?"
Slender: "I suppose."
The two moored their boat and hopped out, going on a little adventure around town. They passed a lot of worn down buildings and a few locals, before eventually seeing something off in the bushes.
Bro: "What's that over there?"
Slender: "I don't know. Let's check it out."
They got out their machetes and started slicing through the brush until they cleared away the last branches and saw an old fighter plane.
It was an old Japalandese plane used in the Khanzem War; a IwoJima Hiro.
Slender: "I wonder if this thing can still fly."
Bro: "Let's see."
Bro hopped up into the pilot's seat.
Bro: "Eww."
He grabbed and threw out the skeleton of an old Japalandese pilot. He and Slender then took their seats. When Bro pressed a few buttons, the plane roared to life.
Slender: "Do you know how to fly a plane?"
Bro: "I'm learning now."
And with that, Bro pressed a few more buttons. The plane started rolling through the jungle, the front propeller chopping the foliage in front of it to bits. It got onto a street where it picked up momentum. The plane eventually lifted off after bouncing down the small street, colliding with things in the process. The takeoff was shaky at best, but Bro had managed to get the plane in the air.
Aboard the aircraft carrier, General Lorn was in the lower levels of the aircraft bay, polishing and arming his Stealth Fighter. General Broseph was there with him.
Broseph: "Our servers are still wonky, Bridger. You'll have to fly manually."
Lorn: "Fine by me. Wish me luck."
Lorn climbed into the cockpit and closed the cab in. The plane's engines hummed to life, as the deck his plane sat on rose up onto the flight deck. General Lorn prepped the plane for takeoff as the ground crew attached it to the catapult.
Lorn (COMM): "General Lorn here. Ready to proceed with takeoff."
Ground Crew (COMM): "Roger that, general. Preparing takeoff."
The engines on the stealth fighter roared to life. The catapult was set and Lorn's fighter was sent flying across the deck. It picked up momentum and took off once it reached the end of the runway. After that, he activated the supersonic engines and blasted off into the skies.
Bro and Slender were flying in their Hiro aircraft for hours. The fuel level was running dangerously low, and they were over open water.
Slender: "If you descend, we'll be more fuel efficient."
Bro: "But there would be more drag."
Slender: "Well, if we run out of fuel we won't fall from so high up."
Bro: "Whatever."
Bro pulled at the yoke and the fighter plane began a rapid descent. It penetrated beneath the clouds, only to be greeted by a scene of total chaos.
Planes were all over the place; fighters from Shops Island, Ed Island, Puffalia, East Pengolia, and Zhou. They fired bullets and missiles at each other, creating an awful mess. Guns were firing everywhere from Shopper vessels. Bro tried to swoop down below the conflict, but ended up being trailed by a Stealth Fighter.
Slender: "There's someone following us!"
In the cockpit of the Stealth Fighter was General Lorn.
Lorn: "Huh, looks like the Japz are back for more."
General Lorn fired a missile at the Hiro fighter, which blew off the rear section of the aircraft and the left wing.
BOOM
Bro: "Ahh! We're hit!"
Bro tried moving the yoke around, but it had almost no effect. The flaming fighter went spiraling down to Earth, bound to crash and sink into the ocean. He managed to catch a gust of wind, which changed the trajectory of his plane. Bro guided it into the path of a Shopper aircraft carrier. As it came roaring in towards the deck, all available batteries opened fire on the damaged plane, as ground crews ran out of the way, some jumping into the ocean. The aircraft came onto the deck with a deafening screech. The propeller ripped to shards on impact, and the plane did three somersaults before coming to a rest.
CRASH!
The rest of the plane was entirely engulfed in flames moments after Bro and Slender jumped out. The deck of the aircraft carrier was wrecked. An angry General Broseph came storming out from the bridge, fully encircled in fury.
Broseph: "WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED!?? WHO ARE YOU TWO LITTLE PUNKS? WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?!?"
Bro replied, while wiping soot off his shirt: "I'm Bro, your ex-President, you moron!"
Slender: "Antonio Mason."
Broseph: "Whatever. Are you here to help us?"
Slender: "Our plane was full of troops bound to help you guys, but it was shot down and we got our way here. We're supposed to be troops."
Broseph: "Hmm... considering your credentials I think we could have a little more to do with you."
Broseph took Bro and Slender up to the bridge where some other commanders were. There was a digital map of the wall, with up-to-date information on the invasion.
Broseph: "Status update, commander."
A young fleet commander turned around to face General Broseph and saluted.
"General, we're between a rock and a hard place. This aircraft carrier is badly damaged, we've already lost four others, and there are over ten that are severely damaged. There are also countless dreadnoughts and warships lost."
Broseph: "Don't withdraw. We need to hold our position; the krauts aren't getting anywhere yet."
Commander: "We have hundreds of other warships at port in Triangapore. Almost all of the rest of our aircraft carrier fleet is there, too. They have stated that they're ready to deploy tomorrow afternoon."
Broseph: "Can they do it now?"
Commander: "No, unfortunately."
Broseph: "Put all available fighters in the air. We can't lose this position."
Commander: "But we'll have no cover in Triangapore!"
Broseph: "We'll work around that; we have plenty of anti-aircraft cannons."
Commander: "As you wish, general."
All available fighters, including those in reserve, were sent to combat the Axis fighters. Meanwhile, the damaged aircraft carriers of the Shopper fleet made their way to the harbor of Triangapore City. The Port of Triangapore had been transformed from an international trading hub into a sophisticated military base. The docks were lined with fighter jets and giant cranes were being used to load ships. There were at least 700 ships in that harbor alone; more than twice as many than there were out on the sea. The whole Triangapore area looked very much like Margate City. The incoming fleet parked just outside the harbor; they'd have to wait until the next day to get in the port for repairs.
As the sun set on another day, president Lavender was on his presidential balcony, staring out into the sunset of Shops City. He was trying to make his situation less precarious as the days rolled by, now that some of his key allies were gone. Flags all around Shops Island had been ordered to fly at half mast for the week's passing after the fall of Polaris.
"Sir, are you busy?"
Lavender turned around to see LMGT, director of the SIA there.
Lavender: "Not anymore. What is it?"
LMGT: "We've been developing a new set of weapons for the best week or so now, and it would be nice if you came to see them."
Lavender: "Sure. Anything to get my mind off of this war."
At the break of dawn the next morning, a Zhouese aircraft carrier crept through the waters north of Malesia's Malé island. On it were many stolen Shopper fighters and bombers. Zhouese pilots boarded them, and took off heading south to Triangapore.
They soon came up on Triangapore, still partially under the cover of darkness as the sun rose from its slumber. Their target: The Shopper navy. The Shoppers expected nothing of the incoming craft, but then they struck.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
Immediately, over ten aircraft carriers were struck by bombs. The fighter jets fired missiles which took out over ten ships at a time. Fire blazed everywhere and everything. Zhouese pilots shot up the gas reserves and the barracks, only to awake the naval crews.
BOOM
Bro: "What was that?"
Slender: "We better get out there!"
Bro and Slender ran for their lives as their barracks burned around them. They came outside to see Shopper planes sabotaging the harbor, sinking hundreds of ships and damaging hundreds more. Airplanes lined up on air strips were mowed down by missile fire. As the Shopper planes crash landed in a kamikaze style, more Zhouese planes were seen coming in the distance. They fired more missiles, sinking even more ships.
Slender: "Quick, get to the cannons!"
They ran up onto a dreadnought that had not yet been hit, and got into cannon seats. They began firing up into the air at the enemy craft.
RATATATATATATATA
Soon, however, the Zhouese retreated. They had left the harbor in ruins, and had destroyed most of the Shopper naval fleet in a matter of minutes. Thick black smoke clouded the air and fireballs burning up throughout. All but three of Shops' aircraft carriers had been sunk in the attack, along with almost all dreadnoughts and countless warships. Bro and Slender jumped off their dreadnought before any more damage could be done, only to be confronted by General Broseph.
Broseph: "WHAT JUST HAPPENED!?!?!"
Slender: "Zhou, last time I checked."
Broseph: "Those stupid rice-hatters! They'll pay for this!"
General Broseph stormed off in a blaze of fury. Bro and Slender could do nothing except watch the area around them burn.
News of the dastardly attack made headline news across the continent within hours. Penguins across Antarctica were stunned to see that an entire fleet of ships, the strongest in Antarctica, was wiped out in a matter of minutes. Lavender was in his presidential limousine racing down the highway, while he was watching the broadcast. LMGT was also there.
News Reporter: "Reports state that at least 650 ships of the 800 strong fleet were completely destroyed or sunk. Out of the 35 aircraft carriers present, all but three were sunk. Military casualties are estimated to be climbing through the thousands, and civilian casualties are in the hundreds. Investigators are sayi-"
Lavender shut off the news feed.
Lavender: "This is bad."
LMGT: "With thousands of troops dead? What else would it be?"
Lavender: "No. The Malesian king is gonna have my butt after this; Triangapore's harbor is wrecked and there are hundreds of civilians dead. Not to mention the media floods."
LMGT: "I have a feeling this is the beginning of the end, sir. They've overrun Polaris, taken down our networks, and destroyed our navy without using nukes. We're beat."
Lavender: "Don't be daft. We've held out against the Zhouese before, we'll do it again. Never give up, am I right?"
LMGT: "Right."
Driver: "Gentlemen, another half hour to our destination."
LMGT: "Yes, thank you."
LMGT turned to Lavender again.
LMGT: "Shall we turn the news back on?"
Lavender: "Don't rub salt in my wounds."
LMGT: "I'll take that as a yes."
LMGT turned the news back on. This time it was a different reporter and a different story.
Reporter: "And we're back with some breaking news! Eyewitness accounts are reporting that Puffalian and Zhouese troops have begun landing in the northern part of the Malesian Malé island. The Puffalians already have de facto control of Broneo island. They are expecting to make a race for the capital, Kuala LOLPOUR."
Lavender: "Well, isn't that great."
LMGT: "Still enthusiastic I see."
Lavender: "No, I still have faith. Our armies are still intact anyway."
LMGT: "Yes, minus a few thousand soldiers and it's like nothing ever happened."
Lavender: "I can never understand how you've kept this job for so long."
Meanwhile, General Broseph and Lorn were surveying the wreckage. As they waddled along the harbor edge, ships lay silenced beneath the sea while others continued to burn in a thick black blaze.
Lorn: "Absolutely horrendous."
Broseph: "We're going to get whoever did this."
Lorn: "And do what? Serve their head on a silver platter?"
Broseph: "Precisely."
Suddenly, Broseph's radio tuned in with an "incoming message" signal.
Broseph (COMM): "Yes?"
Lavender (COMM): "Boys, I have some bad news for you?"
Broseph (COMM): "Triangapore Harbor was attacked? I already heard."
Lavender (COMM): "Did you hear that the Krauts and Zhouese are invading from the north?"
Broseph (COMM): "What?"
Lavender (COMM): "Didn't think so. You and your buddy General Lorn need to go to Kuala LOLPOUR right now. Set up a defense perimeter around the city at all costs; Protect the king and PM or else the international media will be looking to me for answers. Also, make sure they don't get the harbor in Kodos."
Broseph (COMM): "You know better than this; these people will overwhelm us and starve us out. Do you have a better plan?"
Lavender (COMM): "You're the military expert. I suggest that you bring in all available troops. If you still fail, blow up everything they could use."
Broseph (COMM): "So be it."
Lavender (COMM): "Don't fail me again, general. Over and out."
Lavender closed his connection. Broseph turned to General Lorn and said: "Well, looks like we have a new task."
Lorn: "So I see."
Broseph: "Anyway, do you know what the body count is as of now?"
Lorn: "Estimated at around 20,000. Numbers are still climbing."
Broseph: "Hmph. I see why Lavender is worried."
"Hey! Broseph, other guy!"
In the distance, Bro and Slender came running up to General Broseph and General Lorn.
Broseph: "Can't you cretins leave us to be?"
Slender: "Where's the fun in that?"
Bro: "So, you're going to the capital?"
Lorn: "How did you-"
Bro: "Don't ask. We should come with you."
Broseph: "Why?"
Slender: "You'll never know."
Broseph: "Fine. Just stay out of my way. We should get a flight out of here in about ten minutes."
Ten minutes later, the four penguins boarded a Malesian cargo aircraft and were taken to Kuala LOLPOUR. When they arrived, defensive measures were already being taken; The city limits were being sandbagged and artillery cannons were being put in position.
Broseph: "You two go to the king's palace and make sure the king and prime minister are safe. They'll be in the Royal Component. General Lorn and I will make sure they city is fortified."
Slender: "If I were you, I'd make a naval blockade around the port of Kodos first so the enemy can't-"
Broseph: "I know that! Just go do what you're told!"
Bro: "Whatever."
Bro and Slender got in a car and were taken to the royal Malesian palace. Broseph and Lorn went off to go help set up defensive measures around the capital.
After he got off the line with General Broseph, Lavender and LMGT arrived at a secret military base in the heart of Southern Shops. Lavender was taken inside to a hangar where he saw a giant fighter plane there. But, it was unlike any he had seen before.
Lavender: "What the?"
Out of the shadows behind the plane came a familiar face.
LMGT: "Mito! There you are!"
Mito: "Sorry, I was busy. Hello sir."
Mito and Lavender shook flippers.
Lavender: "Impressive plane you have here. What is it?"
Mito: "It's an Interceptor. It's heavily armed and has a top speed of Mach 6; even faster than missiles!"
Lavender: "Interesting. Are these ready for combat?"
LMGT: "Not until our servers are back up. These planes are already in mass-production. Mito, care to show him our other contraption?"
Mito excused herself and went into a back room. She came back out with a model of a ship.
Lavender: "A model. Is this the new pinnacle of SIA engineering?"
LMGT: "You wish. The real version is too dangerous for you to touch."
Lavender: "Please. What's so dangerous about it?"
Mito: "Every square inch of this ship's hull is rigged with pressure sensors that react to anything except water. The second something touches the ship, a Squarium bomb inside the ship detonates. We can destroy whole fleets with this thing."
Lavender: "I like the sound of that. Does it have a name?"
Mito: "They're called "Deadships". Because there's nobody on board, naturally."
Lavender: "Very well. Have these models assembled as soon as possible. Is there anything else you'd like to show me?"
LMGT: "We're designing some other equipment for the army, but they're not ready to be seen yet."
Once Bro and Slender arrived at the royal Malesian palace, they were taken to see the king who was there, surrounded by generals.
General: "Your majesty, here are the agents from Shops Island."
Yang: "Ah yes, Bro and Slender, nice to meet you."
Bro: "I've never met a sultan before."
Yang: "Yes, very funny. How will you be protecting me, again?"
Slender: "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it."
BOOM
Bro: "Speaking of which, TAKE COVER!"
Everyone in the room took cover as Zhouese missiles struck the palace grounds. The palace rumbled with a mighty roar, and ornate glass and stone works from the ceiling shook free, crashing to the ground.
KABOOM
More missiles struck, and this time some missiles penetrated the indoors of the palace, turning the room everyone was in into a chaotic fireball. Many of the generals were burned alive.
Yang: "Are you sure we're safe here!?!"
Slender: "Don't worry! We'll get out of here!"
From the ceiling, another explosion caused an giant glass chandelier to break free from its footings and crash towards the ground.
CRASH!
Shards of glass went flying in every direction, some of which got lodged into Bro and the Malesian King.
Yang: "AAHHH!!!"
Bro: "This is too dangerous. Let's get out of here!"
Slender: "Agreed."
Bro, the king, and Slender got out of their hiding spot and ran through the smoldering wrecks of the palace, albeit hard for the old monarch to do so. They ran outside of the palace, where they were met by a giant taskforce of Puffalian soldiers with loaded guns. All three immediately put their flippers up.
Slender: "What do you krauts want?"
General: "Your blood, crapitalist pigs. You should really be more respectful to your superiors."
Bro: "Should I know who you are?"
General: "I am General Sven Olaf, commander of the Puffalian Armed Forces."
Yang: "You'll never take me alive!"
Sven: "Quite right, old man."
Sven pulled out a sub-machine gun from his inventory and shot the old king straight in the chest.
RATATATATATATATA
Sven also shot at Bro and Slender's feet.
BANG BANG
Bro and Slender: "AHHGH!"
Sven: "Men, take these agents into custody. I will personally interrogate them later."
Soldiers: "Yes sir!"
The soldiers flipper-cuffed Bro and Slender, who still had bleeding hot lead in their feet, and dragged them away.
On the outskirts of Kuala LOLPOUR, in the port town of Kodos, General Broseph and Lorn were helping to set up artillery defenses around the port of Kodos. The Zhouese and Puffalians were already firing missiles at the port, and enemy fleets were clashing out in the bay, but Shopper defenses were only being completed then and there.
Broseph: "Are we done, men?"
Shopper Soldier: "Yes sir."
Broseph: "Excellent. Open fire on the enemy, boys!"
With that, a roaring cry of artillery cannons echoed throughout the port as the Shoppers retaliated.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
The Puffalians and Zhouese retaliated fiercely to Broseph's attack. The situation had turned into a full-on bloody battle.
President Lavender was soon back in Shops City. When he arrived back, he was reading the news. The headline read the following:
Lavender: "Not again."
Violet: "What is it?"
Lavender: "Munijoch's chief general, Isaac Juggernaut, overthrew the government or something and declared himself president."
Violet: "They're on our side, honey. I'm sure it'll be fine."
Lavender: "I hope so. Those Munians need to learn a thing or two about stability."
"Keep firing! Let them eat their own guts!"
General Broseph was busy shouting commands at his troops, as the battle intensified. Both forces risked bombers from above, as troops were slaughtered all around them. The sky had turned black in a cough of smoke and debris. Fire raged in giant infernos, as soldiers continued to charge to their deaths.
Lorn: "Uhh.. Broseph?"
Broseph: "Yeah?"
Lorn: "Krauts from above!"
General Broseph and General Lorn looked up and saw Puffalian paratroopers jumping out of a plane behind the Shopper lines.
Broseph: "Open fire, men!"
Shopper soldiers fired their machine guns at the Puffalian paratroopers, tearing their parachutes to shreds as they fell down to the bearings of Earth.
Broseph: "THAT'S IT GUYS! SEND THEM TO THEIR DEATH-"
"Hallo."
Broseph turned around to see a striking figure behind him.
Broseph: "Who the heck are you?"
"Ich bin Sven Olaf. Preparen zu die."
Broseph: "As if!"
Broseph grabbed a pipe from the wreckage behind him and struck at General Olaf. In response, Sven grabbed an oak plank with a nail through it. They struck hard blows at each other, engaging in a fierce duel.
Broseph: "Die, commie!"
The two exchanged countless blows as they climbed onto a pile of smoldering rubble. Broseph gave a hard blow and obliterated Sven's plank. In response, he picked up a crowbar from the trash and was back in the game. Broseph and Sven continued to banter back and forth, before eventually they were underneath a giant gantry crane.
Sven: "Auf wiedersehen!"
Sven grabbed on to the hook of the crane and pulled the locking pin, sending the hook system into a quick ascent to the top.
Broseph: "No you don't!"
Broseph grabbed onto the bottom of the hook and hung on for dear life as the two enemies were catapulted to the top of the gantry. Sven pulled out his pistol and began firing shots at Broseph dangling below. However, he hid under the giant solid steel hook, so all of Sven's bullets could do nothing but ricochet off in the distance. When the hook slammed to the top of the crane's boom, Sven jumped off and ran down the gantry, still firing away. Broseph, still evading bullets, climbed up onto the gantry and pursued his enemy. Sven ran right to the end of the boom, which hung over a sinking Shopper warship. Broseph caught up to him and pulled his gun out now.
Broseph: "You have nowhere to run! Drop your weapon; surrender!"
Sven: "I'll never surr-"
KABOOM
Out of nowhere, an artillery shell hit the giant gantry crane's boom, and knocked off the section the two enemies were standing on. It plunged to the ground as both jumped away from the boom. They landed in a pile of wreckage; both their firearms were lost. Broseph recovered from the fall first and saw a chainsaw in front of him. He grabbed at it just as Sven recovered. However, the Puffalian general was too late. Broseph turned the chainsaw on and backed Sven into a pile of rubble. Broseph aimed himself at Sven, like an eagle ready to kill its prey in cold blood. Right as he slashed in upon his enemy, a wild shot rang out.
BANG!
A bullet flew through the air and passed through Broseph's arm before lodging itself in Sven's chest. Both combatants breathed one final breath and collapsed to the ground in wrenching pain.
"Owww...."
Dazed and confused, Bro awoke from a long bout of unconsciousness. The last thing he had remembered was being in Malesia; being arrested and taken away to some far unknown land. He thought to himself: "where could I be now?" "Why is everything upside down?". But then he realized where he was. He looked around and saw a bucket of ice water beneath him. He saw Slender there too, and many Puffalian soldiers. A soldier came up to him and slapped him hard across the beak before attaching duct tape to his and Slender's beaks. They were then submerged into the bucket of unbelievably cold water, kicking for air and gasping if they could. The brutal torture went on for hours until they were both knocked out.
When Bro woke back up again a few hours later, he realized that there were no soldiers in the room. So, he reached up to his feet and undid the noose that hung him from the ceiling. And with that, he came down with a crash! Smashing into the bucket of ice water, it spilled everywhere as Bro tumbled on terra firma. He then got up and dusted himself off.
Bro: "Yo Slender! Wake up!"
There was no response.
Bro: "Wake up dude!"
There was still no response. So, Bro got Slender's bucket of ice water and held it up to his head, performing his own waterboarding exercise on his buddy. Slender woke up with a start, gasping for breath.
Slender: "AH! WHAT THE HECK!?"
Bro: "Good to see you're awake."
Bro untied the ropes holding Slender in place and brought him down.
Slender: "Where are we?"
Bro: "Dunno. Let's explore."
The intrepid duo got out of the torture room with haste, and found themselves in an empty corridor. It had a dead feeling, as if it had been abandoned long ago. They crept through the hallways, crossing no soldier's path. Bro and Slender soon found themselves outside, with the blinding rays on the sun flashing down upon them. They looked up atop the building to see, surprisingly, a Shopper flag hoisted high and proud there.
Bro: "Shops? But we-"
"Put your flippers up, strangers and turn around!"
The sound of a machine gun loading behind them shocked Bro and Slender. They turned around to see a Shopper soldier, a very odd looking one, pointing his gun at the two. Bro and Slender put their flippers up.
Slender: "What is this madness? We're Shopper citizens and SIA agents!"
Soldier: "You could be lying. Men, search them!"
Two other soldiers came up from behind and did full pat-downs on Bro and Slender. Inside their clothing they found Bro's wallet which had his credit card in it.
Soldier: "Bro, eh? No middle or last name?"
Bro: "Yes, that's me. And no, my middle and last name is none of your business."
Soldier: "You're good to go. But I don't trust your buddy here."
Bro: "He's a friend. His name is Antonio Mason."
Soldier: "I don't trust you. Come with us to our base, and we can see who he really is."
Bro went with the soldiers and got in a troop transport vehicle which drove off into the forest towards another Shopper base. Slender was stuffed in a small puffle-sized cage and taken with them. When they got to base, Slender got on a computer to prove his identity. Meanwhile, Bro struck up a conversation with another soldier.
Bro: "Where are we?"
Soldier: "Frosian Islands."
Bro: "Did we take it back or something? Why am I here?"
Soldier: "It's a long story, kid."
Bro: "Tell me."
Soldier: "Alright. So, when the Krauts first invaded, they never bothered to clear out all the Shopper military bases. So, we've been operating and fighting the Puffalians directly ever since they invaded in the first place. We take each others' camps, and we had just liberated the heck out of the one we found you in!"
Bro: "Wow. Are you Antarctican? Your uniform looks like one from the USA and you certainly talk like one of them."
Soldier: "Nope. I'm a Frosian Warrior. A lot of us here are."
Bro: "Cool. My friend and I have nothing better to do, really, than join your squadron I guess."
Soldier: "I'm sure our commander wouldn't mind. We'll take all the manpower we can get."
"Broseph... Wake up!"
Lighthearted words were being fed to General Broseph by his best friend, General Lorn. Broseph was still recovering from his injury and would be out from substantial battle for some time.
Broseph: "Ahh... Bridger... Did we win?"
Lorn: "No, sadly. We lost after you got knocked out; we were ill-prepared anyway. Our forces have retreated and are back in Moon Island and Freezestonia."
Broseph: "What... what about Olaf? What about him? Is he... ours? Dead?"
Lorn: "We had to leave him. A bunch of soldiers came running at us while we were trying to recover you and we had to get out of there before we could take the Hun with us."
Broseph: "Drats. Who knows what's next..."
Lorn: "Things have ought to start going our way soon, my friend."
Broseph: "That's what they all say. This war is nothing but battle after battle after battle which we lose. I can only imagine where the Krauts will strike next..."
Chapter Nine: Turning the Tide
In the Military Industrial Complex of Shops City, the tech command room was bustling like madness. Agents and technicians were flooding the room, making connections everywhere and causing havoc. At the center of it all was John Llywelyn, one of the SIA's tech heads. John was overseeing the reboot of all Shopper servers after being shut down for over a month and a half.
John: "Hey, you! What is the progress of the server reboot so far?"
Agent: "J, the server should be fixed soon."
John: "Whatever. I have to go take a phone call."
John exited the room and went into his personal office a couple stories up. He sat down at his desk and waited for a phone call. When it came, it was president Lavender calling.
John: "Yes? Make it quick."
Lavender: "Hey, my favorite J! When will the systems be back up?"
John: "The agents said it'll be up soon... not that I can trust them or anything."
Lavender: "Oh well. Keep me informed."
John: "Will do."
Hans Traugott was at his desk in his government building. He looked up from his paperwork to hear a knock on the door.
Hans: "Come in."
The door opened and in came some Puffalian soldiers and a very battered General Olaf. A soldier kicked the general in the back and he fell to the floor face-first. Hans stood up and loomed over his friend.
Hans: "Good job, soldiers. Now leave us."
Soldier: "As you wish."
The soldiers left the room and closed the door behind them. Hans grabbed Sven by the collar and threw him up against a wall, knocking over a precious painting.
Hans: "WHAT DID YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING!? YOU TOOK FAR TOO LONG TO CONQUER MALESIA!"
Sven: "But sir, ughh... the battles are over... we... won..."
Hans: "I DON'T CARE! WE LOST FAR TOO MANY MEN ON THOSE ISLANDS!"
Hans let go and threw Sven to the floor.
Hans: "Your idiocy will not be tolerated! Because of you, my Freezelandian campaign is in jeopardy!"
Sven: "Sir... I think we... can still... fight on both fronts..."
Hans: "I want you to prove it. You're going to Polaris to invade Freezeland, I will send someone else to invade our other target."
Sven: "Yes sir."
Sven stumbled out of Hans' office. He later flew to Polaris City to start building up an invasion force to take Freezeland. Meanwhile, Hans sent another general to prepare for an invasion of their next target.
"Boys, your secret agent gizmos and stuff won't help you up here. Take this camo and put it on."
A Frosian Warrior was undressing Bro and Slender, and refitting them with more suitable wear. They were being outfitted to look like Frosian Warriors. As they were almost completely dressed, the troop commander came over.
Commander: "Just to let you know, we're preparing for a raid on another Puffalian camp alongside the Fifth Frosian Division. We'll be setting out in just under an hour."
Warrior: "We'll be ready, sir. These boys look competent enough to fight with us."
Commander: "Good. We need all the help we can get; the Krauts are starting to fight back more than ever."
The commander left the three penguins to their own business. It took no time before Bro and Slender were both lavished in more fitting gear. The Frosian Warrior gave them a mirror to look in to.
Warrior: "What do you think?"
Bro: "I look sexy."
Slender: "I wanted an Air Force uniform!"
Warrior: "Sorry kid, we don't cater too much around here. Come with me you two, we need to meet up with the rest of the squadron."
The Frosian Warrior took Bro and Slender to see the rest of the troops in the squadron, who gave the new recruits a hardy welcome into the force.
In Polaris City, General Olaf got off of his plane and was met at the Puffalian-occupied air force base by Feey1.
Feey1: "Hey Frankie! Long time no see!"
Sven: "Was?! I'm not Frankterran, you imbecile!"
Feey1: "Whatever. They're all the same thing."
Sven rolled his eyes.
Sven: "Anyway, how many troops do we have ready for invasion?"
Feey1: "The numbers here say around 250,000."
Sven: "Excellent. We should be able to steamroll Freezeland without a problem."
Back at the Military Industrial Complex, John had been working all night with his agents. They were finally on the verge of a breakthrough, when LMGT and a new agent waddled in.
John: "Hello sir."
LMGT: "Yo-gurt. Are the servers almost up?"
John: "Just barely. We're flushing out any last bugs or bots the enemy could have left inside the system, then we'll be able to restart everything."
LMGT: "Great. We need our complex weapons operating again if we want to win this war. Our missiles can't even fire with the stone-age technology we're using right now!"
John: "Everything will be back to normal any time soon. Say, who's this fellow you have with you?"
LMGT: "You two haven't met before? This is Clank, he works in the building sector with Dr. von Brown most of the time."
Clank: "Nice to meet you J. I've heard a lot about you. I usually help build stuff instead of all this computer gadgetry."
John: "Then what use are you to me?"
Clank: "I know robotics, so I'm pretty sure I can help with flushing out the bugs."
John: "It's taken me all night to flush them out, what can an amateur like you do in a matter of minutes?"
Clank: "Behold."
Clank got behind the seat of the SIA mainframe and typed in an algorithm which immediately disabled the bugs and flushed them out. The system then shut down to refresh itself before rebooting and returning to normal. John was speechless.
John: "How did you-"
Clank: "Robot building helps, old man."
LMGT: "Well, what's done is done. Good job, you two. I assume the systems should be up again within a few hours?"
John: "Certainly."
LMGT: "Fine then. I'll leave you two to do what you must. I have a delivery of donuts to devour! See ya!"
LMGT left the room to go stuff his face with donuts. John and Clank continued working side-by-side to do a final server reboot.
As night fell upon the Frosian Islands, Bro and Slender were in the mess hall with the rest of their squadron, eating up on the few rations that there were. Everybody's meal was abruptly interrupted when the troop commander came in with an important message.
Commander: "Great news everyone, Shops City HQ has just messaged to us; they're on the line right now! Our servers have been rebooted and they're sending help!"
The commander went back to the command center while all the troops continued eating, except Bro and Slender. They got up and knocked on the command center's door. The commander came out to answer them.
Commander: "Yes boys? What is it?"
Bro: "We're elite agents of the SIA first, soldiers second. Can we check out what's going on?"
Commander: "Fine. Come in."
Bro and Slender came into the room, where there was a big screen with lots of data on it. All systems across the SIA had finally been rebooted. On the screen was John, giving them instructions on how to set things and systems up.
Bro: "J! How's it hanging?"
John (COMM): "I have no time for your juvenile antics right now, boys. Leave me be."
Slender: "Can you at least tell us what's going on?"
John (COMM): "All our servers and systems are back in working order. That means all your downed equipment such as the helicopters, stealth fighters, bombers, and more can be used again. We're also sending your squadrons some new machines and a replenishment of supplies."
Bro: "What about Munijoch? Their systems are down too, are they not?"
John (COMM): "We're sending the cleansing algorithm we used to both the USA and Munijoch, so they can restore their systems. The Culldrome Isles and Ed Island were not affected. After this, we should be able to win the war swiftly and effortlessly."
Bro: "That sounds awesome. Keep in touch."
John (COMM): "Don't count on it."
John ended his transmission and the big screen shut off. Supplies were coming their way and the SIA headquarters couldn't help out anymore.
Commander: "He didn't even say goodbye!"
Slender: "Whatever. See ya."
Bro and Slender exited the room and went back to the mess hall to finish their meal. The hall was full of charisma for the first time in a long time, with the soldiers excited to use some of their favorite equipment again. All the troops ate quickly like pigs, trying to finish fast so they could commence their next attack.
Morning had risen upon the southern part of Antarctica. In the peaceful Sealien state of Do'rland, citizens were rising from their sleep as the sun pierced the clouds. But, this serenity was soon broken by the dreaded sounds of cannon fire; war had reached the Seal Islands.
BANG BOOM BANG
Citizens were dazed and confused. Some called emergency services, while others watched in horror. Puffalian ships came in giant armadas out of the sea and landed troops on the shores and rocky cliffs, as paratroopers came from the sky, reaping the winds and opening the gates of chaos as they fell to earth. The Sealien army had almost no barracks in Do'rland and the state was left virtually defenseless. Tanks and troops spread everywhere as the locals could do nothing but watch on.
In De Groot, the president of the Seal Islands, Christina van Guilera, was shocked by the news of the invasion and acted quickly. She dispatched as many troops as possible to Do'rland. Later that day, she gave a speech to the Sealien public.
"Citizens of the Seal Islands, today we have fallen under attack by the evil empire of Puffalia and its treacherous allies. They have taken almost all of the island, and reports of bombings are coming in throughout Suome, Pengvia, Pengmark, and Frosthuania. However, we shall fight back. We, the Democratic Republic of the Archipelago of the Seal Islands has already declared war on the Puffalian empire, and we will not cease our resistance until they are out of our country, and out of every other country! We shall seek the help of our allies, and we will win this war! We have fended off the Batavians just less than a year ago, and we shall fend off these aggressors who come with superior might! The Seal Islands will live forever strong and free, free from tyranny, free for all!"
After her speech, president van Guilera was harassed by reporters, asking her what exactly she had in mind.
Reporter 1: "Miss president! What are your plans to counter the threat of the krauts?"
Christina: "The power of the Seal Islands and the help of our allies will guarantee a victory. I know it to be true."
Reporter 2: "But what about the fact that every other country to come against them has fallen? What do you say to that?"
Christina: "Our allies now once again have the superior technology to counter the Puffalian threat. We also have an army powerful enough to give them a run for their money."
After answering a few more questions, the president got in her limousine and went back to her office to contact some allied leaders. Meanwhile, the Seal Islands couldn't do much more other than wait while the Puffalians pinched in on them.
Some SIA agents were at the Chill57181 International Airport, waiting for a very important guest to arrive. A plane touched down on the tarmac, draping the new flag of Munijoch. Out of the plane stepped Isaac Juggernaut, the new president of Munijoch. Agents escorted him to the center of Shops City where president Lavender and Culldrom president Steven Snowen were about to hold a press conference.
In the building where the conference was being held, president Juggernaut arrived backstage just as Lavender and Steven were finishing up their grooming.
Isaac: "Hello Lavender, Steven!"
Lavender and Steven turned around from their mirrors to see the military warchief standing over them. He looked like a monster in their eyes.
Lavender: "Oh. Uh... hi!"
Steven: "You must be the new president of Munijoch?"
Isaac: "You know it! When's this press conference?"
Director: "In five. You have a few minutes to pucker up if you want, sir."
Isaac: "Pah! No true general would put on makeup for the cameras!"
Lavender: "Hm. Not that we would know."
Five minutes later, the three political leaders were on the stage, smiling for the cameras. As they were introduced, a wave of applause went up. When the audience calmed down, an announcer spoke his words.
Announcer: "Hello everyone! Today, we are gathered here to see what the leaders of these three countries have to say about the state of Antarctica as we see it now. Each leader will give a speech outlining the current situation at hand. Starting off our discussion is president of Shops Island, Lavender!"
Lavender, somewhat nervous, stepped up to the podium and set his script down and began to recite his speech.
"Hello everyone, everyone who is gathered here today! As I have come to meet with presidents Snowen and Juggernaut, the next phase in our continuing war against the Puffalians is emerging. The enemy has struck deep into both the USA and is apparently about to undertake an assault on Freezeland. They have captured our East Ocean Territory and have invaded the Seal Islands as of earlier today. However, it is not all bad news. In the past few days, the ingenuity of the SIA has rebooted our systems, once again making all our countries formidable military powers! We are ready to counter the Puffalian threat once more, and they will not outdo us again. We pledge to help the Seal Islands in their time of need, we pledge to prevent the fall of another country to Hans Traugott's evil empire. The Puffalian empire shall die out soon if it's the last thing we ever accomplish! We cannot flounder any more as these tyrannical powers amass more land and enslave millions and millions of penguins and puffles to lives of anguish and brutality. Our Axle alliance can, and will, stop Puffalia at any cost it takes! Thank you everyone."
Lavender stepped down from the podium and handed it off to president Snowen, who was also a bit anxious.
"Greetings Shoppers, and anyone else who is watching! I come here today to aid Shops Island and the Seal Islands in their quest for freedom and in their fight against the evil Puffalians, after the Culldrome Isles' long hiatus from the war effort. Over the past month, we have devoted our might to squashing the Confederacy of Independent Culldrome, and we succeeded. If we can succeed against a powerful enemy by ourselves, we can surely take on another powerful enemy with the assistance of our allies. The Culldrome Isles is again fully committed to promoting peace and freedom in Antarctica. We are once again able to assist the rest of the Axle Powers in the fight against our greatest enemy yet. We fight this war for the good of us, for the good of Antarctica, for the good of all! Thank you."
Snowen, starting to sweat and tremble a bit, backed out from the podium and handed it to the final speaker, Munian president Juggernaut, who was much more excited and charismatic than Lavender or Snowen.
"Hello all! Greetings to everyone here today! I am none other than the face of the Munian revolution, Isaac Juggernaut! Thanks to me, I have flushed WhiteBlood out of Munijoch for good! I have swept out the pansy government that we used to know! Your president Lavender told me to make an empire out of Munijoch, and look at us now!"
Lavender: "I didn't mean it like that..."
"With the evil WhiteBlood gone and hopefully dead forever, we can now join the fight against the evil Puffalian Empire with our Axle allies! Munijoch will devote all of its might and population to this war effort; nothing is more paramount than freedom from evil! The only way to see the end of this war is through brutal fighting. We will show the enemy no mercy; we will annihilate anyone who stands in the way of order! With the cowardly president Yslenski banished, Munijoch is free to help keep Antarctica strong and free! Hear-hear everyone, this is the start of a new era! Free from these krauts, free from fear, or evil, or tyranny, or anything else that opposes us! What do you say? We shall reign strong! Our opponents don't stand a chance! We will win this war, and all wars to come after!"
Isaac's speech was outstanding and charismatic. The crowd roared in approval and give president Juggernaut a standing ovation. Lavender and Snowen just sat there, still trying to process what their comrade had just really said.
When dawn broke on the Antarctic mainland, the Puffalian and Yowien nationalist armies were preparing for their assault on Freezeland and large parts of the USA. General Olaf was in Enderby City, inspecting a tank column ready to ram past the border and steamroll through Freezeland.
Sven: "Everyone, I want this invasion to be swift. We will strike deep into the hearts of the enemy. If we take Freezeland, we'll surely take the rest of Antarctica!"
Soldiers: "YES SIR!"
All of the soldiers moved into the positions and their, along with many others columns took off west toward the Freezelandian border. Some battalions headed south and southeast to seize tracts of the USA. When the Puffalians and Yowiens arrived at the Freezelandian border, defenses were strong. Freezeland had expected an attack ever since Polaris had fallen, and were expecting a brutal fight to ensue.
Soldier: "General Olaf, what do we do?"
Sven: "Blow them to smithereens, obviously! Open fire!"
With that, artillery cannons were brought to the front and began to bombard the border with shells. Within two hours, the border was decimated and the tanks rolled again.
King Triskelle of Freezeland heard the news almost immediately. From his palace in Frostborough, a servant informed him of the invasion.
Servant: "Your majesty, Freezeland has been invaded! Puffalia and their allies have destroyed our border and are heading towards Ard Mhaca and Farelle! We must stop them!"
Triskelle: "Hmm, this is troubling, no? Do not fret dear servant, we shall see through this, I know it to be true. Tell everyone far and wide that we are under attack! Our warriors will have no problem fighting off these barbarians, if it's the thing they fall for."
Servant: "As you wish, your majesty."
All of Freezeland was alerted about the incoming invasion, and disaster preparations popped up almost instantaneously; in the blink of an eye. Freezeland had been invaded countless times before, and citizens knew the drill by heart by now. Defensive preparations across the country were put on edge, and Freezelandian forces were put in battle stations. Some troops from the USA also came to assist in the defensive measures.
Under the treetop canopies that scattered around the Frosian Islands, Bro and Slender sulked in their base along with all the other soldiers, waiting for something to happen. Their troop commander had suspended any attacks until the promised rations and reinforcements had come.
Bro: "This sucks."
Slender: "Yeah. I wanna go back home to see my girlfriend."
Bro: "You mean your third pillow?"
Slender: "Shut up! Summer has feelings, you know!"
Bro rolled his eyes and replied: "Whatever you say."
Suddenly, a humming was heard buzzing above the sky. It sounded like an airplane. As the sound moved over the treetops, a bunch of Shopper helicopters and fighters revealed themselves. With the assistance of some heavy-lift helicopters from the USA, the air convoy touched down and brought tanks and artillery with them. Among the collection were some Missile Tanks, Interceptors, many casual fighters, several tanks, and over twenty helicopters. As the heavy-lift helicopters left the scene, two Shopper Super Bombers appeared overhead and dropped many giant packages of food and weapons, as well as releasing some paratroopers to assist them.
Bro: "Jackpot!"
As the new arrivals unpacked, the troop commander came out to speak to the soldiers and new arrivals.
Commander: "Alright men and recruits, we are now fully absolutely totally stacked up for an assault on the Krauts! If you ask me, we're gonna whip their sorry behinds right out of Antarctica! What say you all?"
Soldiers: "HOORAH!"
Commander: "That's the spirit, soldiers! Let's go whoop some butt!"
While military bases throughout the Frosian Islands received their well-needed aid, president Lavender was stuck in a boring logistics meeting concerning the current status of the war.
Speaker: "And with these new deliveries, the Frosian Islands have received over 500,000 tons in proper goods. Meanwhile, Shopper troops are being moved to the Freezelandian and Sealien fronts to combat the Puffalian threat. General Broseph has been deployed in the Seal Islands and is actively..."
Lavender sighed and muttered under his breath: "Geez, this is boring."
Luckily, the president got interrupted by an attractive female assistant who came up to him and said:
"Sir, someone very important is on the phone and must speak to you."
Lavender: "Who, my wife?"
Assistant: "No, someone else. Please come with me."
Lavender: "Alright! Anything to get out of this lousy meeting."
Lavender jumped out of his seat with enthusiasm and followed the hot assistant out of the room, leaving all of the others in the room looking cock-eyed.
Penguin 1: "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
Penguin 2: "Haha yeah."
In the other room, president Lavender was given the phone. He went over to an ornate wooden desk and threw his feet up on it while lounging in a given chair
Lavender: "President speaking."
"Hey Lavender, it's EDFan. I have something important to tell you."
Lavender: "Yeah, what is it?"
EDFan: "So, we found some old buddies of ours, and they need our undivided attention."
Lavender: "And?"
EDFan: "I'll need to pull Ed Island out of the war. We're dealing with Fascist idiots on the Moon. At least that's what I've been told."
Lavender: "What? Can't you just do both at the same time?"
EDFan: "Nope, budgets and debt, et cetera et cetera. See ya."
EDFan hung up his end of the phone and left Lavender puzzled. He threw the phone across the room in frustration, knocking over a giant bookshelf.
Lavender: "Ungrateful cretin."
With Ed Island out of the war, the remaining Axle Powers nations would have to work extra hard to keep up the pace.
"Status update. Now."
Hans Traugott was pacing around his office, which was getting more packed with riches by the day. In contrast to the growing ornateness of his office, Hans was getting more out of shape as the days went on. He had lost his slick clean-shaven look and had grown a beard. His hair had darkened and was showing gray. His eyes got a new glimmer of evil and darkness to them. It even looked like he was growing a mustache, with stubble all over his beak.
Nevertheless, while he was pacing, several of Puffalia's military experts were examining pages and pages of reports. There were also two giant television screens. One of which broadcasted a live feed from General Olaf who was still in Freezeland, and the other showing the main general in charge of the Seal Islands campaign. An eerie air of silence filled the room until General Olaf broke the peace.
Sven: "Our forces are almost at Ard Mhaca, and we've already captured Farelle. Bombers have already been sent out to bomb Frostborough and Fanon City into submission."
Hans: "Excellent. I want Frostborough captured by this time next week. Understood?"
Sven: "As you wish."
Hans: "I also want Pufforuscan nuclear missiles to start pounding Frostborough and Fanon City. I have a feeling we'll meet considerable resistance there."
Expert 1: "But sir, everybody will kill us! The Zhouese president doesn't approve of it either."
Hans: "I don't care what Zhou thinks; we're much more powerful than them anyway! I rule the most powerful empire in history, fools! Tell Zhou to let us do whatever we want or else they'll reap the consequences."
Expert 2: "I have a bad feeling about this."
Hans: "Nonsense! Nothing will go wrong - we don't need the Zhouese telling us what to do! Anyway, how is the Seal Islands campaign?"
General: "Great! Do'rland is captured, along with Pengmark, Pengvia, and Frosthuania. Our troops have landed in Suome and are starting to take some of the smaller islands, although I hear that the Axle Rangers are coming to fight."
Hans: "Pah! We can take them on. Don't worry. I want the Seal Islands conquered by the end of this week as well, do you understand?"
General: "Mein Vorstizende, with all due respect, all the little islands will take a bit longer to occupy."
Hans: "Fine. I want the Seal Islands conquered by June then."
General: "Yes sir."
Expert 3: "Sir, what about the Axle Powers? They're our biggest threat right now."
Hans: "Show them hell. Open up the heavens on them. They'll all soon learn never to mess with us! Hahahaha!!!"
Above the frozen wastelands of Lappi in Suome, General Broseph and other troops of the 9001st Legion descended down a rope from their helicopter onto the barren tundra. After everyone got off, Broseph radioed base with the situation.
"Broseph to home, Shopper-chopper has just dropped us off and we're on our way to meet up with the Suomi home army, along with some Sealiens. Over and out."
Command (COMM): "Roger that. Good luck, 9001st."
Broseph and the 9001st Legion set out on their way. After a few hours of trekking, they met up with the Suomi and Sealien armies in a small Lappi village. Broseph saluted the Suomi commander.
Broseph: "You Suomi's know your way around here, right?"
Commander: "Yes."
Broseph: "Well then, what's your plan of attack?"
Commander: "Ah yes. We Suomi good at winter fighting. We wait for Kraut to come and we hide, and then BAM!, Kraut is dead and he not even of know. What you think?"
Broseph: "Guerrilla warfare - I like it. I'll take your word for it. We can start hiding and ambushing whenever needed."
Commander: "Kraut will not attack in Lappi. Will probably attack near Hailsink."
Broseph: "Whatever. Just get us ready to pounce."
Commander: "Yes, will do."
Broseph: "Thanks. Meanwhile men, we need to arm ourselves and get in proper disguises. I want us all to go out into the wilderness and get some stuff to cover ourselves in."
Soldier: "But sir, it's all tundra up here!"
Broseph: "Oh... right... Whatever, we'll do it down south."
General Lorn was at a Freezelandian air force base among some other Shopper, Culldrom, and Freezelandian pilots. In comparison to the Shopper and Culldrome craft, the Freezelandian planes looked ancient - still sporting propellers and there were even some bi-planes along with them.
Lorn: "Alright men, are you ready to kick some Kraut butt?"
Shopper Pilots: "YEAH!"
Freezelandian Pilots: "Aye!"
Culldrom Pilots: "You betcha!"
After a brief rally cry, General Lorn and his comrades jumped into their planes and taxied down the short runways. General Lorn was flying in a supersonic Stealth Fighter, along with many of the other Shopper pilots. Many of the Culldrom pilots were flying in their best fighter jets as well.
Once they got in the air, the fighters made their way towards Ard Mhaca City, with the Freezelandian planes farther behind in tow. As they approached the city, they saw swarms of something off in the distance.
Lorn: "Are those terns?"
Shopper Pilot: "Probably."
As they got closer to the "terns", it became evident that the figures were not terns. They could not be sure what they were until the objects suddenly opened fire on the formation.
RATATATATATATATA
Over ten planes were instantly knocked out of the sky by the gunfire. The Shoppers and Culldroms returned fire crippling many fighters which turned out to be Puffalian.
Lorn: "Strange, I don't see any Zhouese planes this time..."
Usually, there were a few Zhouese fighters among the Puffalian squadrons, but not this time. It was suspicious.
A few minutes later, off in the distance among the dog-fighting aircraft, something caught Lorn's attention in the corner of his eye. He diverted from the air battle to go check it out. When he got closer, it was obvious what the object was.
"MISSILE!!!"
General Lorn immediately and instinctively opened fire on the missile, blowing it up in a deafening blast.
BOOM
Missiles of the sort had been raining down on Ard Mhaca for the past two days now, and plumes of smoke could be seen rising from the city all the way from the air. After destroying this missile, General Lorn went back to his fighter group and helped fight the Puffalian aircraft. Off in the distance, Puffalian bombers were still wailing away at the Freezelandian city, dropping bombs and incendiary devices all over the place.
Meanwhile, on the Freezelandian terrain, General Olaf was leading a quickly-advancing tank column towards Ard Mhaca. The bomber runs had almost completely weakened Ard Mhaca's defenses. In the skies, the air battle between the allied and Puffalian fighters was still raging on.
However, out of nowhere, a scream:
"INCOMING!"
General Olaf didn't know what that was supposed to mean, until he could hear the roar of jet engines. He turned around, and saw a Culldrom fighter corkscrewing out of control towards the tank column.
Sven: "SCATTER!"
The tanks split off in every which direction, narrowly avoiding the barreling fighter which smashed into the ground with a deafening explosion.
KABOOM
He sighed a sigh of relief and comfort as the smoke cleared from the impact sight.
"Alright men, move along."
The tank column rolled forward again as if nothing had ever happened. It took little time before the tanks crossed the river and had reached Ard Mhaca, and were perched atop a hill with a clear view of the rest of the city.
Ard Mhaca was ancient, even by Puffalian standards. There were only three buildings which one could consider skyscrapers, scattered around in random spots. The city looked as if it was stuck in the past - 200 or so years gone.
Sven: "No time to smell the flowers. This is for the fatherland! OPEN FIRE!"
The troops obeyed their general's order and immediately opened fire upon the ancient city. Off in the distance one could easily see locals fleeing in every direction, desperately trying to escape the clutches of evil they had felt all too well many times before. It only took a handful of minutes before parts of the city raised white flags in defeat, the locals would do whatever it would take to defend their ancient home; they knew in their hearts that the occupation would only be temporary, as it always was. Many Freezelandian locals even spoke German and would hail Swiss Ninja without a care because of numerous Snoss occupations in the previous years.
The peaceful sanctity of the Frosian Islands' forests was churning and about to be disturbed. From Bro and Slender's Shopper base, some helicopters took off laden with weapons and ammunition. Along the ground, more troops and vehicles set out on foot - They were about to attack the largest Puffalian base in the area.
In the skies, Slender was in a helicopter manning one of the giant Gatling-machine guns.
Pilot: "Hey kid, remember to keep a look out for the krauts down there. They're really sneaky."
Slender: "Yeah yeah."
As the helicopters flew above the trees, Slender and other gunners opened fire on suspected Puffalian troops. The pilots also dropped a few napalms to clear out areas for the advancing infantry, and to wipe out larger groups of enemy soldiers.
On the ground, Bro was marching with the other troops. He was talking with a soldier in a uniform he had never seen before.
Bro: "So, what division are you part of?"
Soldier: "Second Homeland Division."
Bro: "What? That's not in the army."
Soldier: "I know it isn't. I'm part of the SIA Special Forces, they were just formed last month."
Bro: "Oh."
Soldier: "Anyway, did you hear about the guy wh-"
PEW PEW PEW
Out of nowhere, a lone sniper killed off three Shopper soldiers. Everyone was dumbstruck. As the infantry unit ground to a halt, a bunch of Puffalian soldiers covered in branches and shrubs jumped down from the trees and surrounded the Shoppers, guns armed.
Puffalian Soldier 1: "Achtung! Put your flippers up and surrender, and nobody gets hurt!"
Everyone put their flippers up and were ready to surrender, but suddenly, out of nowhere, an explosion was heard.
KABOOM
Through the trees far away, a giant explosion occurred. A colossal fireball engulfed the surrounding forest as plumes of smoke rose into the atmosphere. Coming from the blast were two Shopper fighters racing above the speed of sound.
Puffalian Soldier 2: "ACH! OUR BASE!"
The Puffalian soldiers were distracted. In their folly, the Shopper troops pulled their guns out on the enemy.
Shopper Soldier: "Ha! The tables have turned! Put your flippers up, krauts! Your jig is up!"
The Puffalians decided that it wasn't worth a fight and surrendered.
Shopper Soldier: "Boys, take these guys back to base and give them our special treatment."
They were taken back to the Shopper base for "special treatment", which was simply code word for torture. Shortly after the Puffalian troops were taken away, some of the helicopters came back and airlifted the dead Shopper soldier back to base. From his radio, Slender gave Bro a status update.
Slender (COMM): "We blew up the base. We're gonna build a new base there for our purposes and they'll probably send more soldiers in."
Bro (COMM): "Hooray for us! Take that, commies!"
The Shopper troops soon returned to their base to plan the next assault. Some soldiers, including Bro, went to the destroyed Puffalian base to rebuild and turn it into another Shopper compound.
In the Seal Islands, the Puffalian advance had perpetually ground to a halt. Other than the capture of a few more miniscule islands, the Puffalians had largely been bogged down in Suome, facing increasing Allied opposition. More Allied troops were moving in division upon division, most of which from Munijoch. General Broseph was still stationed in Suome among the Suomis, and was being taught in the art of winter warfare. He was hiding behind a snowbank with a Suomi soldier.
Suomi: "Yuo see, yuo want hide in snow and pounce on Ruscan bear when he in sight."
Broseph: "Hey buddy, we're fighting krauts here, not borats."
Suomi: "Well then yuo shoot kraut dog, same same."
Off in the distance, a Puffalian soldier was waddling on patrol, looking for enemy soldiers.
BANG!
The Suomi soldier had shot the Puffalian. However, following behind the Puffalian soldier was more troops.
Suomi: "More krautdogs! Here is gun, take."
General Broseph was given an old-fashioned rifle, the kind that was used by the Suomis as far back as the Khanzem War.
Suomi: "Yuo know how to shoot, yes?"
Broseph: "Maybe."
Broseph loaded the rifle and aimed it through a hole poked in the snowbank.
BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG
Without missing a shot, Broseph had killed all of the Puffalians.
Broseph: "That should do the trick."
It didn't. Out in the distance, the sound of cannon-fire could be heard – Suddenly, some tanks came over the horizon and were crushing trees as they came.
Suomi: "AH! TANKS! Don' worry comrade, I kill them!"
BANG BANG BANG
However, the gunshots did nothing to the tanks and only left a few dents on them – The Puffalian crew was provoked and started firing at Broseph and the Suomi soldier.
Broseph: "Step aside, noob."
Broseph pulled a rocket launcher and three projectiles out of his inventory. He loaded the rocket launcher and stood above the snowbank, ready to fire.
Suomi: "NO! DON'T!"
Too late. Broseph had already fired off the three rockets and they struck their targets head-on.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
Broseph: "What were you saying? I couldn't hear you over my skillz."
BOOM BOOM BOOM
Guns were constantly firing away in Freezeland. After he had captured Ard Mhaca, General Olaf and his army was making a be-line for Frostborough. He had already captured Delilah and Mhic Lionnai and was encroaching on the Frostborough general area. The Freezelandian Army was ready to fight, although the city's population was already largely gone. Once the Puffalian army had gotten within sight of the Frostborough city center, General Olaf halted his advance.
Sven: "Aim the cannons and fire! These jokes can't last much longer."
In minutes the cannons were raining down on the city. Puffalian bombers flew overhead and dropped large masses of bombs on Frostborough, turning the city into a blazing inferno.
Meanwhile, King Triskelle was still in his royal palace, which was being constantly bombarded. Ornate plasters and decorations all around the palace came crashing to the floor. Soot flew throughout the building as servants tried to persuade their king to flee, however, to no avail.
Triskelle: "Flee? Arst thou mad? If we surrender this city to the barbarians, then what honor shall be bestowed upon us? – None, I say! We are heroes, and thou shalt fight as such. We shan't follow the same path as they who hast fallen to the brutes yet!"
Servant: "But your majesty, you'll die if you don't leave! We can always continue the fight elsewhere!"
Triskelle: "I would rather die than live thine life a coward."
Servant: "We can cross the Frostborough River and continue the fight from Fanon City! The Allies can help us with fortifications!"
KABOOM
All of a sudden, a large bomb hit the opposite wing of the palace from where Triskelle was and destroyed half the building.
Servant: "Don't you see, your majesty? You're in grave danger here!"
BOOM
Triskelle: "Thine argument holds some weight, brother. Fine. So be it. If I am not safe in my own palace, then I shall fight the barbarians in person!"
Triskelle got up out of his throne and went to fetch his battle gear. The servants went off to gather some of Freezeland's finest warriors to fight the Puffalians.
General Broseph was still fighting among the Suomis in Suome. They were still using guerrilla tactics against the Puffalians, although numbers of Puffalian troops were slowly trickling down and the fighting was getting easier. In some time between battles, Broseph and the others had time to polish their weapons and generally do as they pleased. During a short period of peace, Broseph got a radio call.
Broseph (COMM): "Yes? Speaking."
Lorn (COMM): "Broseph! So glad you picked up!"
General Lorn had a chilling and shocked expression in his voice.
Broseph (COMM): "What is it?"
Lorn (COMM): "They've invaded Freezestonia!"
Broseph (COMM): "What?"
Lorn (COMM): "The Puffalians! They've invaded Freezestonia! Governor Snowstormer says they've already captured Vorué and are approaching Lartu!"
Broseph (COMM): "Well crap. Lavender's gonna want my head on a platter after this."
Lorn (COMM): "Probably. But at least I have some good news."
Broseph (COMM): "Yes?"
Lorn (COMM): "The number of Puffalian soldiers in the Seal Islands has started decreasing, and their advance has pretty much stopped. Just in time too, they were only a few islands away from De Groot."
Broseph (COMM): "Perhaps I can launch an offensive to take back some territory."
Lorn (COMM): "Please do. Our army needs a morale boost."
Broseph (COMM): "I'll see what strings I can pull. Keep me updated."
General Broseph put his radio away and ducked behind a snowbank just in time before some Puffalian soldiers came wandering over a hill. Broseph and his comrades then unleashed the dogs of fury upon them, as they had done so many times before.
King Triskelle made his way with soldiers in tow to the foot of the hill where General Olaf was overlooking the destruction of Frostborough. As the cannons continued to fire, and bombers continued to wreak havoc in the city center, Triskelle gave out a mighty cry.
Triskelle: "HARK! Stop, ye awful brutes! Away from this land shall ye leave! Out I say, out!"
General Olaf could barely hear what was going on from the top of the hill, but saw king Triskelle and his warriors preparing for battle at the bottom of the hill.
Sven: "What the..."
Triskelle: "ATTACK!"
Triskelle's warriors drew their swords and began to charge up the hill.
Sven: "Men, open fire on them!"
The Puffalian soldiers took out their guns and fired on Triskelle's warriors; they didn't stand a chance.
RATATATATATATATATATATATA
In a matter of seconds most of Triskelle's warriors were wiped out. From behind them came a Freezelandian helicopter, which dropped a rope and lifted Triskelle and the rest of the warriors to safety. As the helicopter took off and evaded cannon fire, Triskelle had one more thing to yell out to General Olaf:
Triskelle: "You have not won yet, Barbarians! And you shan't ever win!"
As the helicopter flew into the distance, General Olaf decided it was time to make their next move.
Sven: "Men, now is the time to strike! Onward!"
The Puffalian troops made their way down the hill and into Frostborough. The bombers had already loosened up the city and there were almost no defenses, not to mention the chaos now that their king was gone. Much of the city was ablaze. Tanks filed through the streets, destroying any opposition.
General Olaf went with some of his favorite soldiers and stormed into Triskelle's royal palace. They killed the royal guards, and Olaf made his way into the grand hall where he sat on the throne.
Sven: "HAHA! I'M THE KING OF FREEZELAND! YIPPEE!"
BOOM
Out of nowhere, a Puffalian missile came smashing into the palace, completely destroying it. General Olaf and his troops were buried under the rubble, but many of the troops were killed. He dug himself up through the wreckage and climbed to the top of the smoldering pile that used to be an ornate structure. He pulled a large Puffalian flag out of his inventory and waved it around, amidst all the fire and brimstone slowly engulfing Frostborough.
A few hours later, the city formally surrendered. All Freezelandian troops and most citizens escaped to west of the River Frostborough, which separated Frostborough from Fanon City. The Freezelandians immediately began to dig in, put up reinforcements, and defend against the Puffalian menace.
Now was the time to strike. Broseph had noted the decreasing number of Puffalian troops in the region; they were being shipped off to Freezeland, Freezestonia, and the Frosian Islands, which were slowly being taken back by Allied forces. Broseph gathered with General Lorn, some other officials, and president Lavender via telescreen to discuss their invasion plans.
Broseph: "So, I suggest we first go into Pengmark and liberate Coopenhagen, considering they're so close to us. Then we can invade Pengvia, then Frosthuania, then everywhere else."
Lorn: "If I were you, I would simply invade Pengvia and then Frosthuania. My air force can blast Coopenhagen into submission; all of Pengmark is very lightly defended."
Broseph: "So be it. After that, go soften up Do'rland, Hailsink, and then come assist us. If we've already liberated those guys, go deal with the krauts in Freezestonia."
Lavender: "But be careful. I don't want civilians killed."
Lorn: "Got it. Our air force is bigger and better than ever with these new interceptors! They'll do a spiffy job!"
General: "Broseph, sir – When will we invade?"
Broseph: "Tomorrow. Five-hundred hours. We will invade Pengvia first and might send some special forces into Frosthuania to hit the ground running. I'm expecting Admiral Swaggins to bring his fleet to my port so we can have a proper invasion fleet."
General: "Alright."
Lavender cut his connection and went back to work in his office. Everyone else quickly dispersed from the gathering and went on to do their own things: General Lorn went to summon his bombers, who took off mere hours later to go soften up the area. As Lorn had predicted, Coopenhagen fell easily, and had surrendered before nightfall. Broseph and his other generals went to prepare an invasion fleet for the next morning. Everything was running like clockwork.
By now, all Freezelandian troops and most civilians had withdrawn from the Puffalian-occupied part of Freezeland and had started building up defenses on the River Frostborough. Engineers from the Seal Islands, Culldrome Isles, and Shops Island came in to help turn the River Frostborough into an impassible barrier. The entirety of the river was doubled in width, and was dug down to over fifty fathoms in depth. The river was laden with mines, as to prevent a channel crossing. On the Fanon City side of the river, large walls were being constructed with cannon emplacements every ten feet apart and constantly manned with troops. Shops Island sent Deadships into the Frostborough harbor to counter the Puffalian naval presence, and the wall of cannons continued to extend all along the coastline, as to prevent an enemy landing. Other strong defenses were set up along district lines as well, to prevent a land invasion from the Puffalians.
"Hurry up, everyone! We want to land in Pengvia before sunrise!"
General Broseph was frantically working on getting his invasion fleet ready for the invasion in two hours. It was three-o'-clock AM and everyone was tired; Broseph had gone to sleep at about eleven the night before. Landing crafts were hooked up to countless warships and dreadnoughts, along with two aircraft carriers. Captain Swaggins was also there, overseeing the preparations.
Swaggins: "Hey Broseph, I got a present for you."
Broseph: "Hmm?"
Swaggins: "Follow me."
Captain Swaggins' escort carried him across the makeshift and dimly-lit military port. They passed the port and went down the shore line for about half a kilometer before stopping in some brush.
Broseph: "What are we doing here? You're an admiral, not a biologist!"
Swaggins: "I know."
Swaggins' escort cleared a path through the trees, and went through the path to come onto a beach. In front of them was a Hovercraft Carrier!
Broseph: "Wow! What is this?"
Swaggins: "A hovercraft carrier. It's an amphibious aircraft carrier, and can carry twice as many fighters."
Broseph: "This is sweet, man!"
General Broseph immediately took advantage of his new hovercraft carrier and sent it into the makeshift port. Landing crafts were moored onto the sides, and 200 more Shopper jets flew in from the Shopper mainland to be put to use on the Hovercraft Carrier.
With all the hustle and bustle, it was five-o'-clock in no time, and the invasion fleet floated out of port and into the Boltic Sea. One dreadnought filled with SIA Special Forces operatives separated from the fleet to land quietly and independently in Frosthuania. An hour later, as the sun rose, they had come within range of Pengvia.
The coastlines of Pengvia were lightly fortified, as the Puffalians had not had sufficient time to fully protect their coastline. Broseph and Swaggins' fleet sailed into the Gulf of Rigo, near the capital of Rigo. This area was more fortified than the rest of the country.
Puffalian Troops lined the coast, in concrete bunkers along beaches lined with barbed wire and obstructions. As dawn rose above Pengvia, the Puffalian soldiers in these bunkers saw a vast armada appearing out of nowhere over the horizon.
Puffalian Solider 1: "ACH! ENEMIES!"
The Shoppers immediately began to open fire on the beaches of Pengvia, ripping the defenses to shreds. The Puffalian troops were lightly armed as well, and were not in the best state to fight.
Puffalian Soldier 2: "RUN!"
By the time the Shoppers began landing on the beaches, some Puffalian troops had already ran away, but most stayed and fought the Shoppers from their bunkers. Shopper casualties mounted, but they were able to overrun the Puffalian defenses and push forward into Rigo and capture the capital.
It was dusk in Fanon City, where General Roberts was hopping to-and-fro down the streets. He was there to help with defending Freezeland and holding off any more Puffalian advances, along with lots of the Culldrom army and over three million troops from Munijoch. It was lightly raining out, and was about 9:30 PM. Roberts liked Freezeland; it was classy and Victorian in a sense, just like the Culldrome Isles. While he was hopping down the street, he stopped at a stall and purchased a newspaper, then went inside a pub to read it.
Roberts: "Let's see how the war is going."
Roberts opened up the newspaper and went to the "war" section of the Fanon City Chronicle, a section of the newspaper opened up just to give updates on the war situation. When he flipped to the page, the headline read:
Roberts: "Heh. The tide is finally turning in our favor."
He read elsewhere in the newspaper about the complete halt of Puffalian advances in Freezeland. The Sever river had just been land-mined and defended all the way to and through the Snowbourne Mountains, where defenses continued as miles of land-mines and trenches. In the USA, the Antarctic Army was keeping the Puffalian advance at bay, and in Frostborough and other Puffalian-held port cities, Shopper deadships were decimating the Puffalian navy. The tide had finally turned completely – absolutely in the allies' favor.
Chapter Ten: The Blitz
President Lavender was stuck in a Common Legislature meeting regarding war bonds and foreign aid to other allied countries. While left and right-wing politicians argued their points over each other, the president was stuck rolling his eyes in boredom.
Liberal Politician: "We must assist our friends overseas, it's the right thing to do!"
Conservative Politician: "No way, idiot! We can't just give handouts like that, it teaches them that they can just whine and get anything they want from us!"
Independent Politician: "I THINK YOU'RE ALL STUPID!"
Lavender: "Ugh..."
Speaker Placid: "Peace, peace, everyone! I'm sure we can find a reasonable compromise-"
BOOM BANG CRASH KABOOM BOOM BOOM
Suddenly, the structure of the Shops Island government building shook, and loud explosions were heard. Fire alarms went off throughout the East Tower of the Shopper Government Buildings, which was where the Common Legislature was located. The council meeting was immediately adjourned as diplomats flooded out of the building escorted by bodyguards. As firefighters and emergency services came, fire billowed from the tower, and everyone was evacuated from the West Tower. Many other buildings in the general area, and around the city, had also caught on fire. As everyone had finally calmed down, the unthinkable happened.
CRASH
Fire had melted and weakened the steel structure of the East Tower, and the building began to collapse onto itself. Everyone, including Lavender, ran for their lives as the building collapsed into its own footprint and sent massive towers of debris flying in every direction. Shops Island was under attack.
Later that day, Lavender was hustled to the Military Industrial Complex, where he met up with Clank, LMGT, and John. They sat down at a conference table, accompanied by guards.
Lavender: "What the heck is going on here? What's with all the chaos?"
LMGT: "It was the Puffalians."
Clank: "They've started a bombing campaign."
Lavender: "From Freezestonia?"
John: "Yes."
Lavender: "Those huns! They'll pay for this!"
LMGT: "Satellite reports say that they have nuclear missiles aimed at us."
Lavender got up from his seat and started pacing around the boardroom, glancing at everyone in the room.
Lavender: "Put our Squarium missiles on high alert. The second they try to strike, unleash hell on them."
LMGT: "What about Zhou? They'll surely retaliate, and they have a huge nuclear arsenal."
Lavender: "We can bomb them into submission. Now if you excuse me, I have a speech to go make."
Lavender waddled out of the room with his guards in tow. He was to make a speech from the Shops City Square regarding the Puffalian attacks.
Less than an hour later, Lavender was ready to present his speech from atop his presidential balcony, overlooking a shellshocked and war-tired populace. Over the past few months, the citizens had been worn down from the loss of friends and family, food and material rations, and relentless militarization. It was now late May - the devastating war had been going on for almost three months now. Everyone's attention turned to their president as he signaled that he was ready to speak.
Lavender: "Thank you everyone for assembling here today. The daunting attacks that have swept Shops City today can only be summed up as a gross atrocity committed by our enemies. According to SIA reports and surveillance, we have concluded that this was none other than a Puffalian bombing run. Intelligence has also concluded that they are in the process of positioning and preparing nuclear missiles for launch - with no reasonable explanation to it other than a preemptive attack on our soil."
Lavender paused for a split second, and the crowd became hysteric. Mass panic cascaded over the crowd like a kayaker over rapids.
Lavender: "As I was saying, all, the Puffalians have made it very clear that they do not only want to dominate the Frosian Islands, where this war started, and the rest of Antarctica. They have made it crystal clear that they want us and our friends dead, the same way we annihilated the late Yow a year ago. But do not be afraid, people! Our nation yet has the capability of countering the enemy's threat. We can repel anything they throw at us. We are slowly winning this war, and we will not let a cowardly attack stop us! We will fight to the end, we will never capitulate! We will never surrender! We will never, never, NEVER GIVE UP!"
The crowd went wild. Lavender had managed to boost their morale and a glimmer of hope flashed over the populace. However, Lavender wasn't done yet - not by a long shot.
Lavender: "Until now, we were playing by the rules of war! But the krauts have taken it one step too far. This wasn't an act of war, this was cold-blooded murder! This was nothing but a senseless attempt to provoke us, to get us to take the first idiotic step! They want us at the bargaining table begging them for peace! No! These saboteurs cannot beat us! Our Shopper democracy shall always reign supreme over their socialism! We will fight their menace and their ideologies wherever we can. We shall fight them on the beaches! In the air! On the seas! Upon high ground! Even in space, if need be! We will never never never give up! Giving up is not in Shopper nature! The Krauts started this war, and by golly we'll be the ones to end it, and they'll be the ones begging for mercy! We will win! This attempt at making us bow down to your evil has failed! Whether we bring justice to you, or we bring you to justice, justice will be served! We will fight! We will not let a senseless attack stop us, not for a moment! We can win this war, and we WILL win this war, just you wait!"
A roar of cheers erupted from the crowd. Everyone in the pulpit was absolutely elated. Lavender went off the balcony, and was flogged by reporters as he went back into his office.
Lavender's speech was broadcasted all across Antarctica. In Culldrome City, Steven Snowen was watching Lavender's speech with General Roberts while eating dinner.
Snowen: "He knows how to stir a crowd."
Roberts: "I say."
Snowen: "He's been calling me for a summit lately, so it's given me an idea."
Roberts: "Yes?"
Snowen: "I was thinking we could have a summit with all the allied leaders, so we can plan the future battle strategy."
Roberts: "Where? Here?"
Snowen: "No. There's still reconstruction going on! President Juggernaut likes the idea, but he says Munijoch is also reconstructing."
Roberts: "What about South Pole City?"
Snowen: "Too busy, too close to the front, and there's a risk of a bombing campaign."
Roberts: "Well, do you have any ideas?"
Snowen: "I think De Groot would be pretty good. The Puffalians have been pretty much pushed out of the Seal Islands now, and the city is pretty far from the action, and has good accommodation."
Roberts: "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
Snowen: "Yep."
Steven Snowen called up all the leaders of the allied forces, and all of them agreed to hold a summit in De Groot as soon as possible. Steven Snowen and Lavender flew there ahead of everyone else to prepare everything. The city briefly introduced martial law as preparations for the international leaders was underway. De Groot soon became one of the safest and most secure cities in Antarctica, to protect the leaders who would be coming; De Groot would be a hotspot for activists and assassins with such high influence in the area. The De Groot Conference was ready to take place.
A few days later, De Groot became a world-class city - even more than before. The streets and storefronts were polished anew, there was not a speck of trash in sight, and all the homeless and poor were rounded up and put into makeshift shelters for the time of the conference.
A venue was set up along the De Groot Canal. Podiums and stands for each of the allied leaders were put up on a massive stage. In the center was the Seal Islands' podium, to the left was Shops Island, right was the Culldrome Isles, and the rest of the podiums spread out from there.
Meanwhile, it wasn't long until the leaders started arriving. Each leader was separately escorted to the conference, where many reporters had gathered. One leader at a time made his procession up the red carpet which was laid out. First to go was Lavender, who was accompanied by his presidential anthem, and then Steven Snowen with his. Isaac Juggernaut went down the procession with a Munian military hymn playing, Spike Hike with the national anthem of the USA, as did Nathaniel B. Kratz of the Free Polarian Forces. King Triskelle then entered, fully dressed in his royal outfit, with Freezeland's royal anthem playing in the background. Last to come in was Christina van Guilera, to the tune of the Sealien Anthem. She was the first to speak, as she approached the podium.
Christina: "Hello everyone - leaders and citizens, for gathering here today."
The public part of the conference was almost purely ceremonial and had almost no value to the actual De Groot conference, which would take place behind closed doors. The leaders spoke at the podiums to tell Antarctica about the war and how they thought of it.
Christina: "As you all know, we are here today to discuss the current situation of the war and the plans for the future. We will hear from three leaders today: USA President Spike Hike, Shopper President Lavender, and Culldrom President Steven Snowen. First to speak will be President Spike Hike - Thank you."
Christina stepped down from the podium and Spike Hike took her place.
Spike Hike: "Hello all. As this devastating war rages on with growing intensity, the want of Antarctica's populace screams for us to end this war. The forces of evil are running rampant throughout our world, and it is the duty of us, the civilized world, to clean up this mess we've made. We shall not flinch in the face of danger, even if it comes at extraordinary costs! The allied forces have the best soldiers Antarctica has ever seen. While the enemy's advance has been largely stopped, we are still struggling against their eternal threat in my homeland, and in neighboring Freezeland. With these talks, us allied leaders will effectively devise a strategy to defeat the enemy and restore peace to Antarctica. I'll let Steven Snowen take the podium now. Waddle on everyone!"
Steven Snowen: "Thank you president Spike. As he said, our countries are collectively facing one of the greatest threats in our histories. Puffalia and its communist allies cannot be trusted, and grow more dangerous as days grow on! Fortunately, the Culldrome Isles, the Seal Islands, and other nations of the Axle Powers have effectively repelled Puffalian forces from the Seal Islands, so we could be here today. We have lost much in this war, and have gained nothing as of yet. However, great sacrifice is the price of freedom. Our methods on the battlefield may be brutal, but let us be sacrificers and not butchers. We sacrifice enemy lives for a better Antarctica, as well as our own. We all wish this dreaded war would end, but as long as evil powers are churning that is impossible! Our job, collectively as a coalition, is to defend Antarctica from this evil! We must lay down the lives of men now to preserve the sanctity of our future generations! Do any of you want to live in a communist-run world? I don't. If we are to win this war we must deliver a knockout blow! We have already turned the tide, and now it's time to finish the job! The Culldrome Isles, and the Axle Powers, are committed to ending this war as swiftly and victoriously as possible. With our people behind us, there's nothing we can't do! President Lavender, if you may."
Lavender: "Alrighty."
Steven Snowen got off the podium and took a deep breath. He and Lavender high-fived as they passed each other. Lavender adjusted his headband, and surmounted the podium.
Lavender: "Friends, allies, countrymen, hear me out! This war has gone on far too long, and it is time for us to deliver our deadly strike! We have the manpower and technology to kill our enemies in cold blood - we must utilize these assets! We'll stab the communists right in the back! It may be gruesome, but it is the only way freedom and democracy may live. A large offensive will be costly, but we must make the ultimate sacrifice from time-to-time to make sure that our freedom is guaranteed. We have fought too many a costly battle already - it is time to give the knockout punch! We must, we can, and we will liberate our fallen friends in Polaris and Freezeland, as well as around the rest of Antarctica! We have stayed stagnant for too long now, we have the power to end this war in our favor! So what are we waiting for, fellow freedom-lovers? Let's do this!"
A huge roar of approval waved over the crowd. Reporters and commoners alike clapped and cheered wildly. The leaders spent the next hour taking questions and inquiries from reporters and other politicians. However, this was only the tip of the iceberg - there was much more to be discussed.
Afterwards, all the allied leaders assembled in a heavily-guarded conference room. There was a chair for everyone and one extra, a giant screen on one end, and a digital map of Antarctica's northern coast on the other. Lavender sat on one end of the table, and Spike Hike on the other. Steven Snowen and Isaac Juggernaut sat next to Lavender - Nathaniel B. Kratz and King Triskelle sat next to Spike Hike, and Christina van Guilera sat alone in the middle opposite the empty seat.
Spike Hike: "Let's begin, shall we?"
Kratz: "Where do we start?"
Lavender: "First we need some logistics. Turn on the telescreen and I can get the numbers for you."
The screen turned on, and John walked up to the screen.
John (COMM): "Yes?"
Lavender: "We just gotta ask you a couple logistical questions, J."
Snowen: "Agent John, how many troops do we have?"
John (COMM): "Total, or by state?"
Snowen: "Both please."
John (COMM): "Let me get a list."
John left the screen for a minute and came back with a checklist. It was a table, with the following parameters on it:
| Country | Number of Active Troops |
|---|---|
| Shops Island | 5.5 Million |
| Culldrome Isles | 1.2 Million |
| Munijoch | 160 Million |
| United States of Antarctica | 225 Million |
| Free Polarian Forces | 550 Thousand |
| Freezeland | 11.4 Million |
| Seal Islands | 8.6 Million |
Snowen: "...Wow."
John (COMM): "Wow indeed. That totals to 412.25 million troops at our disposal."
Kratz: "That's amazing!"
Spike Hike: "Hey, I hate to burst your bubble, but a majority of our troops are stuck defending our borders and overseas territories, as well as some of the free republics."
Lavender: "Well, how many can you spare?"
Spike Hike: "Between four and five million probably."
Lavender: "What about equipment?"
Spike Hike: "Zilch."
Juggernaut: "Munijoch will provide all its military might where it's needed! You can count on me, Lavender!"
Lavender: "Yeah, whatever. Triskelle, how many troops can you provide?"
Triskelle: "I do not beseech ye, but methinks most of my army is defending against the barbarians along our borderlands."
Lavender: "By barbarians, you mean the Puffalians?"
Triskelle: "Ay."
Lavender: "How many can you spare?"
Triskelle: "A ha-million, no more unfortunately."
Lavender: "Fine. Kratz, what about you?"
Kratz: "All of our forces are available."
Lavender: "Great. Christina, what about you?"
Christina: "Hmm, our country needs some desperate repairs..."
Lavender: "Yeah, so?"
Christina: "I'm afraid we can't provide any more than a hundred-thousand troops. Sorry."
Lavender: "Whatever. Us Axle nations can carry the brunt of the work."
Juggernaut: "That's the spirit!"
Snowen: "Say, John, how strong are the Puffalian armed forces?"
John (COMM): "Our spies tell us that their army is roughly fifty-seven million strong."
Spike Hike: "What? How is that even possible?"
John (COMM): "The Puffalians have taken prisoners from every territory they've conquered, and drafted almost the entire adult male population into army service for their army."
Kratz: "How do they keep everyone in check?"
John (COMM): "The threat of death, obviously."
Lavender: "Okay J, I think that's all the logistics we need for now."
John (COMM): "Fair enough. Tally-ho!"
John turned off his connection, and everyone got back into their table formation.
Lavender: "Now that we know who's devoted to the invasion and how many troops we have - around 175 million (a majority of which are Munian) - we need to decide on-"
Snowen: "Wait! Who will supply the equipment?"
Lavender: "Shops will, obviously. We have the largest navy in Antarctica, second largest air force, and second largest army - all in terms of equipment numbers. Shops has enough equipment to supply an military of 120 million, and the industrial capability to build & supply a military of half a billion, although that would take a long time. The rest of you can pitch in with your machinery."
Snowen: "Of course... So, you were saying?"
Lavender: "I was saying we need to decide on where we will launch the invasion from."
Kratz: "We can launch it from Puerto Elanor or the Juno Islands. They have many natural harbors and can fit-"
Lavender: "No. They're too far away from the landing front."
Juggernaut: "Well, where are we landing?"
Lavender: "I'll come to that in a minute. Anyway, I was thinking we can launch from Cheeseland, as well as creating a ring of artificial islands to launch out from."
Christina: "If you need help building islands, I can supply engineers for that. Us Sealiens are great at building artificial islands."
Lavender: "Alright. Then it's settled. We'll launch our attack fleet from Cheeseland and the artificial islands. Now, to show you where we'll land."
Lavender got up from his seat and went over to the digital map. He tapped it and zoomed in to the northern coast of Freezeland.
Lavender: "I suggest we invade the beaches around Delilah and-"
Juggernaut: "No way! That's far too obvious. We should land farther west, on the very northern tip of Freezeland."
Lavender: "Fine. We'll do that."
Juggernaut: "We should also set up a decoy to put the krauts off guard; create a fake army and make it look like we're gonna invade Delilah."
Snowen: "I like it!"
Lavender: "Me too. Good idea."
Spike Hike: "So, is it settled?"
Lavender: "Yes. We'll put all of our 175 million troops into the invasion, on the northern tip of Freezeland. We should easily be able to establish a beachhead and branch out from there."
Kratz: "When will we invade?"
Lavender: "It's late May now so... let's peg it for June the fifteenth."
Snowen: "That's only half a month away!"
Lavender: "So? We have the resources to pull it off in that amount of time. Any more questions?"
There was a brief silence, and then Lavender spoke again.
Lavender: "No? Good. We know what's gonna go down now: We invade northern Freezeland with all our manpower and push out from there. Got it?"
All: "Yes."
Lavender: "Great."
The allied leaders had just agreed on what would be the largest military operation, and largest invasion in history. They finally had the master plan to wipe out the Puffalian armies dead in their tracks, and a plan to restore peace to Antarctica. The war was about to flip completely.
Almost half of the Frosian Islands had now been liberated by Shopper forces. However, troop numbers in the region were slowly dropping in preparation for the invasion of Freezeland.
Meanwhile, Bro and Slender were out on a hunt-and-kill mission with part of their battalion. Bro had grown close to the group commander - they were now close friends, he had given Bro many tips and gifts, including his first Knicicle.
Bro: "So you said there's supposed to be snipers in these areas?"
Commander: "Yep. They camouflage and hide in the trees with silenced guns. I can't count how many troops I've seen lost to those-"
PEW PEW PEW
Suddenly, the commander himself became victim to one of the Puffalian snipers as a bullet got lodged in his torso. Bro pulled out his pistol and shot into the trees, killing the sniper and causing his corpse to fall from his perch. He then attended to the commander, who was still barely alive.
Bro: "Will you make it?"
Commander: "No... soldier... Come closer..."
Bro leaned in closer as his commander spoke his dying words.
Commander: "The allies are... planning an invasion... and I want... I want you... to be the new commander..."
Bro: "Wait, what?"
Commander: "I trust you... friend... it's the... end... for me... goodbye cruel world..."
The commander's eyes shut one last time as he exhaled, and the life escaped from him. He was dead. Bro sighed, saluted his friend, and continued marching with the battalion. He informed the group on the situation, and that he was now in charge. Slender for one, didn't believe him.
Now that their advance in Freezeland had stopped, and they were being pushed out of the Frosian Islands and the Asiapelago, Hans Traugott needed to do something quickly to keep Puffalian morale high. Hans was meeting with his advisers, whose numbers were slowly trickling down as the war progressed.
Hans: "WE'RE STARTING TO FAIL! WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING, YOU IDIOTS!"
Adviser 1: "How about we focus our troops on the Frosian Islands?"
Hans: "No! That's a terrible idea!"
Adviser 2: "How about we continue the bombing of Shops? Perhaps use Puffarus' nuclear weapons!"
Hans: "OF COURSE! They can't defend against nukes!"
Adviser 3: "Mein Vorsitzende, that's a terrible idea!"
Hans: "What?"
Adviser 3: "Nuking Shops is a terrible idea... - oh... crap."
Hans: "Guards, take him away!"
Two buffed-up guards came into the room and ripped the dissenting adviser out of his seat. They dragged him out of the room, and about a minute later a faint gunshot was heard.
Hans: "We shall wipe Shops Island off the map - I'm a genius! How come I never thought of this before?"
"SIR! THE PUFFALIANS ARE-"
"I already know. I can see the bombers from my window."
An SIA officer had barged into Lavender's office, to alert him of an incoming Puffalian attack. Lavender mistook it for another bombing raid, but the truth was much more grave.
Officer: "No, sir! Come with me! The SIA has to show you something."
Lavender: "Fine."
Lavender was taken from his office and moved to the lower chambers of the Military Industrial Complex. They went into a bunker room with many widgets and such inside. In the bunker was LMGT, John, and Clank.
Lavender: "What's the problem?"
LMGT: "The Puffalians have launched a Pufforuscan nuclear missile and it's heading straight for us!"
Lavender: "Well, what the heck are you waiting for? Blow it to pieces!"
Clank: "But Lavender, remember last time we did tha-"
Lavender: "I don't care about the consequences! Just do it!"
Clank: "Yes sir."
Within seconds, a Squarium missile had been launched from a Prosperity Space Station, which rapidly intercepted the Pufforuscan nuclear device. It created a massive explosion over the impact point, which was over northern Shops Island. A giant black nuclear-fallout cloud spread out from the impact zone, which would permeate there for at least two weeks, just like what had happened in 2013.
Alarms were still flashing like crazy around the control room, and agents were still scurrying around. People had went off to inform the public that there was nothing to be worried about.
John: "What now? We can't stop here - they'll keep bombarding us."
Lavender: "Then we attack them! They've made a huge mistake on this one; we're going to destroy them!"
Clank: "What do you mean?"
Lavender: "We'll rip them to shreds with Squarium nukes. Attack them now!"
John: "But sir - what about Zhou!?"
Lavender: "The Air Force has already sent bomber fleets to take care of them. By the end of the day, Peking, Nampai, Honk Gong and Muçao will all be wiped off the map."
LMGT: "Won't they retaliate?"
Lavender: "They're already beginning to break with the Puffalians, I doubt they'll do too much - we'll bring them to the bargaining table with an offer they can't refuse."
In Peking, Zhouese president Wu Jiao was in total panic. He saw the Shopper bombers out of his window destroying ancient Zhouese architecture without remorse - he had also received reports of widespread damage and panic in Nampai, Honk Gong, and Muçao. He had called in some of his aides to talk to him.
Jiao: "We can't let this happen! We need to do something!"
Aide 1: "Sir, I doubt we can defend against them. Not without heavy casualties."
Jiao: "We can't surrender - what will everyone think of us?"
Aide 2: "They'll keep bombing until they get their way. They might even start launching missiles at us."
Jiao: "But we can hold them back, we have enough weapons, no?"
Aide 2: "We'll exhaust them all eventually. Plus, they can make as many as they please by international law. We can't win."
Aide 3: "Weren't you going to break ties with Puffalia anyway if they did this?"
Jiao: "Yes. I ended our alliance with them earlier today. We're independents against Shops now."
Aide 1: "But we still can't win! We can have peace with honor - I'm sure they'll accep-"
Suddenly, another aide ran into the room with a transcript in his flippers.
Jiao: "How dare you disturb us? What is the meaning of this?"
Aide 4: "Sir, this is important! We've received a transcript from Shops Island and the Allies!"
President Jiao took the transcript out of the aide's flippers and read it. The message said:
- Dear Zhou, and to whomever it may concern:
This is a formal statement from the countries of the Allied Coalition forces: Bargain for peace now, or be destroyed. We have the military power to wipe Zhou off the map. Please rethink your options before retaliating. If you come to a conclusion for peace, we will accept your request with open arms and warm intentions.
Sincerely,
- Lavender, Shops Island
- Steven Snowen, Culldrome Isles
- Isaac Juggernaut, Munijoch
- Spike Hike, United States of Antarctica
- Nathaniel B. Kratz, Free Polarian Forces
- Triskelle, Freezeland
- Christina van Guilera, Seal Islands
- The free Creatures of Antarctica
Jiao: "I don't know... I don't feel that we should trust them."
Aide 2: "Do we have a choice?"
Aide 3: "We should send a diplomat to be safe. If they come back on good terms, then we can rally for peace."
Jiao: "Fair enough. I shall await the results."
President Jiao's aides silently left the room, while he was left there to stare out the window and watch the ancient city burn before his eyes. Zhou could not put up a fight with their powerful enemy any longer; it was time to close the gaping wound.
"Mein Vorsitzende, have you heard the news?"
"No. What now?"
Hans Traugott was being informed on the current situation of the war - Puffalia had just lost a powerful ally.
Adviser: "Zhou decided to cut ties with us after we launched missiles at Shops. They're apparently begging for peace now."
Hans: "What? This is outrageous! Do they have any sense!? They can't side with the evil capitalists! THEY'RE ONE OF US!"
Adviser: "Sir, I don't think they ever really liked us anyway..."
Hans: "Whatever. We can still win this war! WE WILL WIN! They'll be sorry, they'll ALL be sorry they went against us!"
"Hey guys, check this out! Look at the news!"
Bro, Slender and a bunch of other troops huddled around a small portable television which beamed light into the dark tent where they were gathered. There was a breaking newscast blaring over many TV stations.
TV Host 1: "A Zhouese diplomat has just arrived in Moon Island, marking the first diplomatic mission between the two countries in over a year."
TV Host 2: "That's right! The Zhouese diplomat is planning to have talks with Moon Island governor Dps04 and Shopper President Lavender, in hopes of signing a peace treaty to end the war effort against Zhou and cease any preexisting hostilities. Neither Shops nor Zhou have made any statements regarding a possible means of ending the war against Puffalia at this time."
Soldier: "Did you hear that? This war might be coming to a close! We can go home!"
Slender: "Doubt it."
Bro: "Lavender will never make peace with Puffalia - I doubt he'd even sign a treaty of unconditional surrender. He wants them destroyed. Which reminds me... Slender, gather up all the troops in this camp. I need to have a talk with all you guys."
Slender: "Will do."
A few minutes later, everyone in the camp was gathered outside, and Bro was standing on a makeshift podium made of shipping crates and forklift pallets.
Bro: "Everyone, now that the time has come, it's time for me to tell you a big secret."
All the soldiers looked confused. They had no idea of what the allies were planning in the midst of their time in the Frosian Islands.
Bro: "Over the past half month, the allied governments, especially ours, has been planning for a massive invasion of Freezeland, and subsequently the Antarctic mainland to oust the krauts from their strongholds. This invasion will be massive; over 175 million troops from most allied countries will be landing on the beaches of northern Freezeland and liberating the occupied territories of mainland Antarctica. Troops from every theater of the war are being shipped out to Cheeseland, Free Polaris, and Munijoch to prepare for the invasion which will occur in three days from now. So, either today or tomorrow, at least three quarters of us, including Slender and I, will be shipped off to Cheeseland to assist in the invasion. That is all."
Bro jumped off the pile of shipping pallets which he was standing on, and was immediately intercepted by Slender, as all the other troops stood congregated and talked amongst themselves.
Slender: "Can we have a little talk?"
Bro: "I guess."
Slender pulled Bro back to behind a tree.
Slender: "What's going on? You didn't tell me about this!"
Bro: "I myself only found out yesterday, man! Don't worry, we're being shipped out sometime in the next few hours. Just pack up your stuff and be ready to leave."
Slender: "How do we know this is worth it?"
Bro: "It is. This is the largest military operation ever undertaken by anyone in history. It can't backfire."
Slender: "I hope you're right. What happens when we arrive in Cheeseland?"
Bro: "We meet up with our battalions. I think we're each gonna be commanding one, we'll just fight alongside each other."
Slender: "Okay... I'll get ready..."
Bro: "Good. I'll see you at the airstrip."
The next morning, Bro, Slender, and numerous other Shopper soldiers arrived in Cheeseland. The entire colony was in an absolute frenzy, with troops from every corner of Antarctica bustling around preparing for the incoming invasion. Bro and Slender had just gotten off the airplane when someone called out to them.
"Psst. Hey, you guys! Over here!"
Bro and Slender turned around to see a shady character standing up against the front landing gear of their aircraft. As the approached closer they recognized the figure - it was General Broseph!
Bro: "What are you doing here?"
Broseph: "Me? Here in Cheeseland? Oh, you know - the same thing as the other 175 million soldiers here. The place is absolutely packed, I tell ya."
Slender: "Why do you want to talk to us?"
Broseph: "Not here. Come with me."
Broseph took Bro and Slender out from the airstrip and into the heart of Cheesy Island; the capital. They arrived at the doorstep of the main Cheeselandian government building, where the Shopper, Snowinian, and Cheeselandian flag flew high and proud. The three penguins were approached by two guards who smelled of vodka.
Guard: "кто ты и что ты делаешь здесь?"
Broseph: "Look buddy, I don't speak communist. Just let us in! Don't you know who we are?"
Guard: "хорошо."
The guards stepped back as Broseph, Bro and Slender proceeded through the doors. Bro and Slender were surprised to see the government building transformed into a giant war-room. There were generals from all the allied countries, including General Lorn, General Roberts, General Puff, and many miscellaneous generals recruited for the invasion. Broseph showed Bro and Slender to a desk where General Lorn was.
Lorn: "Ah, you two rascals again. I reckon we met in Malesia, didn't we?"
Slender: "Yep."
Broseph: "So, guys. We've been monitoring your progress in the Frosian Islands and we're quite impressed. Slender, you're an excellent fighter. And Bro, you're an excellent leader."
Bro and Slender: "Thanks."
Lorn: "Which is why we're recruiting you two to be generals for the upcoming invasion, and-"
Bro: "We already know. We'll be fighting on the same beach, right?"
Lorn: "Yes, you'll be in charge of that beach. But, we'd like you to know that you're in quite high esteem, we expect much of you two."
Broseph: "Indeed. You guys have two days to gather your troops and be ready to ship out on the morning of the 15th. No ifs, ands, or buts."
Bro: "Gotcha. We'll be on it."
Slender: "See you around."
Bro and Slender both parted ways to gather the troops and supplies for their battalions. The greatest invasion in Antarctic history was mounting, and the countdown clock was quickly ticking away; the Puffalians had no idea of what fury was about to strike.
Chapter Eleven: Overlord
"Land ho, everyone! Get ready, we'll be landing any minute now!"
Bro and his battalion were on a Shopper landing craft, navigating the choppy waters off the coast of Freezeland. Slender's battalion was directly beside them. The fog was thick and the air was cold - it was the morning of the big invasion - 175 million troops making their way to either liberty, or their fates.
Soldier 1: "Man, this fog is thick. I wonder if it'll ever lift."
Soldier 2: "I hope not. The krauts can't target us with this fog. They're firing on us, and our warships are firing back! Go us!"
Bro: "Pipe down, you two - we don't wanna get spotted- oh crap."
As Bro and Slender's landing crafts came closer to shore, they saw an ominous cliff towering above the beach. It was at least fifty feet high, with heavy reinforcements and gun emplacements at the top, and rows of barbed wire, landing craft snags, and land mines on the beach.
BOOM BOOM RATATATATATA BOOM
Now that the allied landing craft were coming up on the beach, the Puffalians began firing on them. Many landing crafts were completely destroyed by land mines, and the sound of gunfire was deafening. Suddenly, Bro's landing craft halted in its tracks, and the pilot threw open the gates. At least ten troops from Bro's battalion were slaughtered the second the gates opened.
Bro: "This is it, boys! CHARGE!"
Soldiers: "HURRAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"
Thousands of troops flooded onto the beach, many of the first stepping on land mines, getting shot, or getting snagged in the barbed wire. It only took seconds before the sea became red-washed with blood, and desecrated remains littered the area, all while the chaos still ensued. Bro and Slender hid behind a snag in the water, as well as many other troops. They could barely hear themselves think over the gunshots and explosions.
Slender: "What do we do now!? They'll kill us if we go across the beach!"
Bro: "They can't kill us all! There's only like, five of them and hundreds of us! At least some of us have ought to survive!"
Slender: "So we're gonna charge?"
Bro: "Yep! FORWARD-HO!"
Bro, Slender, and a couple other troops stormed from behind the snag, out of the water, and across the beach. Most of the troops were shot before they could reach the halfway point. Bro and Slender were about to make it out of the gun range and to the cliff wall, until-
BAM!
A round went right through Bro's shoulder and he collapsed on the ground in agonizing pain, barely adding to the screams coming from all the other wounded soldiers.
Bro: "AAAAAGHH!!!! SLENDER, HELP!"
Slender had already made it to the cliff wall and had just realized that Bro wasn't there. He turned around to see his friend laying in the dirt, clenching his shoulder while squirming to avoid flying bullets and debris. In an act of heroism, Slender jumped out from his safety zone and dragged Bro to the cliff face.
Bro: "Thanks man, you saved me there. How many other troops are safe?"
Slender: "I don't know! Not many, that's for sure. Here, let me bandage you up."
Slender got out his First Aid Kit and poured some rubbing alcohol in Bro's wound, then wrapped it in gauze.
Bro: "OW! ARE YOU INSANE!?"
Slender: "Shh! It's the best I can do!"
"BZZKT. Generals Bro and/or Slender, do you read? BZZZ"
Bro: "What was that?"
Slender pulled out his radio and turned it on.
Slender (COMM): "Slender here, copy."
Command (COMM): "General Mason, have you secured the beach yet?"
Slender (COMM): "No, it's a solid rock face, and we've lost most of our troops already!"
Command (COMM): "How many are in a safe position?"
Slender (COMM): "One or two hundred I'm guessing. The other few thousand are dead!"
Command (COMM): "Roger that. We'll see what we can do."
Slender (COMM): "Thanks."
Slender threw his radio out towards the sea, but it got shredded by Puffalian machine gun-fire in midair.
Slender: "I won't be needing that anymore."
All Bro and Slender could do now was wait. They gathered their troops, and some of them tried to scale the perilous cliff face, only to fall to their deaths.
Further west, General Broseph had landed with his 9001st Legion. They were having difficulty taking the beach, so Broseph and a couple other troops snuck out and went behind the beach, and up atop a hill behind the Puffalian bunkers. The area was dangerous, however, as it was being bombarded by warships in the distance; Broseph even lost his helmet in the chaos. A couple of soldiers threw grenades down upon the Puffalian bunkers, blowing them to bits.
BOOM BOOM BOOM
Suddenly, Puffalian troops came racing out of the bunkers in a frenzy, running uphill - they didn't stand a chance.
RATATATATATATA
Now, all the Puffalian troops laid dead. Broseph still stood atop the hill with his smoking gun - the 9001st Legion had successfully won another battle.
Suddenly, Broseph got a call from his radio.
Broseph (COMM): "Yes?"
Lorn (COMM): "Ay Broseph, how is your beach?"
Broseph (COMM): "A pretty high altitude situation, but we won."
Lorn (COMM): "Jolly good, mate! I'm off to help some unfortunate licks further east."
Broseph (COMM): "What's up?"
Lorn (COMM): "They're stranded behind a cliff and almost their entire army is dead. We're going to help them. Cheerio!"
Broseph (COMM): "Hm. That's unfortunate. See ya."
Broseph closed his connection and put his radio back in his pocket. A bunch of soldiers gathered around him and gave out a victory cry.
"HURRAH!"
Soldier: "Sir, what do we do now?"
Broseph: "We push inward. There should be some more troops meeting with us in a few villages further inland."
"Look! Help is on the way, guys!"
In the distance Bro and Slenders' troops could see a bunch of fighters and helicopters coming in to assist. The helicopters dropped paratroopers, and the fighters blew up the Puffalian bunkers before any more damage could be done. Helicopters hovered above the cliff and dropped rope ladders down, which all the soldiers climbed up to safety. When Bro and Slender got to the top of the towering rock wall, General Lorn was there to meet them.
Lorn: "Ah, so you were the yokes that needed rescuing, innit!"
Bro: "Yeah, thanks for that."
Slender: "You saved our bacon."
Lorn: "No problem. Gosh, it seems like you lost a lot of soldiers."
Bro: "Most of them, yes. It was a slaughterhouse times-five down there!"
Lorn: "Well isn't that a bloody load. Ah well, we need to get you guys to safety, we'll hitch you a ride. Hop on!"
Bro and Slenders' troops hopped aboard with the air force and flew further inwards of the Freezelandian mainland. By noon that day, all the beaches had been successfully captured and around 150 million troops were lucky enough to escape the beaches with their lives. The stage was now set for the allied liberation of the Antarctic mainland.
KNOCK KNOCK
"Ugh... what is it?..."
"Mr. President, we have great news!"
Lavender got out of bed and waddled over to his door and opened it. There was one of his assistants who showed him the latest headline in the local newspaper.
Lavender dropped the newspaper. The look on his face was ecstatic.
Lavender: "YES! WE DID IT! VICTORY IS OURS!"
Assistant: "They're currently bombing Mhic Lionnai into submission - the generals plan to have another large meeting later today to discuss their next plans of action."
Lavender: "This is awesome! Eat that krauts, we've won this war! Booya!"
The reactions of all the other allied leaders was nearly unanimous. The invasion of Freezeland had given a great confidence boost to the citizens of the allied countries, and an aura of confidence and pride was now present among the Allies.
That night, all the surviving generals from the Freezelandian Invasion gathered in the city of Mhic Lionnai, which had been captured just an hour before. All the generals, hundreds of them, were inside a giant hall.
Broseph: "Everyone! I need your attention, fellas!"
All the generals stopped socializing with their friends and colleagues and turned around to see General Broseph, who was standing on a stage.
Broseph: "Now that we've conquered this city and vast swaths of the Freezelandian coast, there's nothing that can hold us back!"
Generals: "HOORAY!"
Broseph: "Next, we're gonna split up and liberate the entire mainland. A quarter of the army will head west to liberate Frostborough, while the rest of the army will head east to liberate Polaris and New Delphis. We'll start the next stage of our offensive tomorrow morning, so don't drink too much cream soda tonight. Thanks for your attention."
Broseph waddled off the stage and went into a back room, as well as a few other high-ranking generals which were pulled from the gathering. The room had a giant table and a map of the northern half of Antarctica on it.
Broseph: "I'll be heading on the western campaign to capture Frostborough, because that's where most of the Puffalian army and navy is right now. Many of you guys will head west and capture the rest of Antarctica.
Lorn: "Broseph, can I come with? I was born around there!"
Broseph: "If you want, but I still need someone to command the air forces in the east."
Lorn: "I'm sure they can handle it. We shot down a lot of the air force in the invasion and in the Seal Islands."
Broseph: "I hope you're right. Now, for the rest of you, there's no more to discuss. Go have a good time and be ready to push out tomorrow morning."
Generals: "Yes sir!"
In Puffalia, the situation was become more and more miserable by the hour. Shops Island and the Culldrome Isles were launching Squarium and Porcyal missiles multiple times on a daily basis. The destructive weapons were leveling the mountainous Puffalian landscape, as well as destroying all the cities, including the capital Triskale. Hans Traugott and his closest aides and advisers had relocated to a bunker underneath the main Puffalian government building until further notice. Hans was flipping out at his advisers over the allied foothold in Freezeland.
"WHY WASN'T THIS PREVENTED, YOU DUMBKOPFS? OUR ARMY IS SPLIT AND THE ALLIES ARE ADVANCING! YOU IDIOTS MIGHT LOSE THIS WAR FOR US, IF WE CANNOT GET BACK ON TRACK! I want the allies off the mainland and out of Cheeseland within a week or else you'll all be executed for betraying the fatherland. Now, GET GENERAL OLAF FOR ME!"
One of Hans' aides want to hook up a video connection between him and General Olaf. The connection was bad, however, as the allies were tampering with Puffalia's communications.
Sven: "Yes, what is it?"
Hans: "WHY DID YOU LET THE ENEMY ON TO THE BEACH? WE MIGHT LOSE THIS WAR IF YOU DON'T DO SOMETHING!"
Sven: "Sir, the allied armies are already coming upon Frostborough - we might be run out before tomorrow. We-"
Hans: "I DON'T CARE! YOU BETTER HOLD THAT POSITION, OR ELSE."
Sven: "The fatherland will win this war, I'm sure of it, mein Vorsitzende."
Hans: "NO! STOP BEING SO LENIENT! I WANT THE ALLIES OFF THE MAINLAND AND OUT OF CHEESELAND BY NEXT WEEK, OR ELSE I'LL HAVE YOUR HEAD ON A PLATTER!"
Sven gulped. He replied half-heartedly and half-worriedly: "Yes sir."
Sven turned off his connection and went to reinforce defenses for Frostborough and sent out some expeditionary forces to meet the incoming allied armies. However, no matter what he could try, he would fail. The Puffalians were sorely outnumbered and in ever-weakening shape. They didn't stand a chance.
A Culldrome Heavy Bomber and two Shopper Super Bombers were flying above the skies of Frostborough. In the cockpit of the Culldrome bomber was General Roberts, and inside one of the Super Bombers was General Lorn. As they zoomed over the skies, terrorized citizens ran for their lives.
Lorn (COMM): "You ready mate?"
Roberts (COMM): "Definitely! Drop!"
The bomb bays opened from below the bombers, but instead of bombs coming out, tiny Parasite Fighters emerged instead! They immediately scattered and scrambled around the city to eliminate strategic targets. As the bombers pulled up and turned away, they could see explosions in the Freezelandian harbor - the parasite fighters were decimating the Puffalian navy.
On the ground, General Broseph and two soldiers from his 9001st Legion were waddling down the streets of Frostborough, which were littered with debris. The Shoppers and Culldroms had wiped out most Puffalian opposition on the ground, and they were beginning to get desperate. Most of the Puffalian soldiers were taken prisoner by the Shoppers.
Soldier: "Sir, how much longer until the krauts will be gone?"
Broseph: "Anytime soon I bet. We've wiped most of them out already, and it won't be long until they surrender."
"INCOMING! GET OUT OF THE WAY!"
BOOM
A giant ornate building next to Broseph and the troops suddenly had an explosion, and began to rapidly collapse. Puffalian soldiers jumped out of the burning and falling building, either severely injuring or killing themselves on impact. However, Broseph saw a figure survive the damage and start running off.
Soldier 1: "Who is it?"
Broseph: "I don't know. Just-"
Soldier 2: "GET HIM!"
The soldier starting running after the escaping figure, hoping to catch him and see what was up.
Broseph: "Whatever."
Broseph and the other soldier also started running after the mysterious figure, who began to accelerate. The figure then jumped on a motorcycle what was leaning up against a telephone pole, and zoomed off.
Broseph and the soldiers jumped in a old convertible from the 1960's that was sitting on the curb, covered in dust. They fired it up and began to pursue the figure. They sped out of the war-ravaged downtown district and onto the highway, where they accelerated to over a hundred miles an hour.
Broseph: "Hold my wheel!"
Broseph got up out of his seat and began firing at the figure on the motorcycle.
RATATATATATATA
The tires on the motorcycle popped, the motorcycle lost balance, and the figure collapsed to the ground, and was subsequently run over. The convertible stopped on a dime and did a U-turn back towards the figure, who had got up and climbed off the highway and into the brush.
Broseph: "Oh no he doesn't!"
Broseph and his soldiers ran right off the highway and flew right over the figure, before landing in a river.
SPLASH
When Broseph and the soldiers recovered from the crash, they swam out of the convertible, but the mysterious figure was gone.
Broseph: "Nuts!"
"General Olaf! Thank goodness I found you! Why are you so scratched up?"
General Olaf had just emerged from a set of bushes, and was scratched up and covered in tire tracks. A Puffalian soldier immediately confronted him.
Sven: "Some Shopper maniacs just chased me down. I think they drowned though."
Soldier: "Almost all our forces are gone, sir. Many have either escaped, killed themselves, or surrendered."
Sven: "How many soldiers do we have left?"
Soldier: "No more than a hundred, sir."
Sven: "Well, I'm certainly not surrendering to the capitalists. They'll parade me around like some stupid Puffle."
Soldier: "What else should we do?"
Sven: "I heard there's still a ship or two intact in the harbor. If we can get there, we can escape back home."
Soldier: "Brilliant idea, sir! We can go right now!"
Sven: "We have no choice, I suppose. Oh well, we'll push them back off the mainland when they finish off Frostborough."
General Olaf and many of the other Puffalian soldiers quietly escaped Frostborough and fled on a small Puffalian frigate, so they could fight another day. Within minutes, allied and Freezelandian flags were flying over Frostborough once more - the next stop was Polaris City.
In Polaris City, the head Puffalian general in charge of the Meilor Polarian area was sitting in his office in the Polaris Harborfront Center, reading the newspaper. He had his feet up on his desk and let the sun's rays caress him throughout.
CRASH
The window behind him smashed as a glass bottle broke through. He dropped his newspaper and swiveled around on his chair to see that someone had thrown a Molotov cocktail into the room.
General: "NONONONONO!"
He ran out of the room as fast as he could, just in time before:
BOOM
The office exploded and a giant mob outside cheered. The general was running down the hallways and stopped an assistant.
General: "What the heck is going on!? Somebody just destroyed my office!"
Assistant: "I don't know. Maybe next time you should put your office higher than the third floor."
General: "You're useless - get out of my way!"
The general kept running through the hallways before coming to the front doors of the center, which he barged through. He was stopped cold by a plethora of anti-Puffalian protesters - thousands of them - who were sick of their rule and wanted Polaris back. Before he could react to what he saw, a shot rang out.
BANG!
The general flopped on his belly, bullet in his chest, and slid down the stairs leaving a pool of blood trailing behind him. The mob went wild and proceeded to storm the Polaris Harborfront Center itself, so to cleanse the Puffalians from it. After their general was killed, a new general, who was much softer and more liberal, was put in place. The troops in Polaris City were immediately mobilized and began to slaughter protesters in the hundreds. However, it was too late for the Puffalians to quash the rebellion - liberty was on its way.
Meanwhile, Bro and Slender's battalions, along with millions of other allied troops, were being transported towards Polaris City. Tanks zoomed ahead, facing little to no opposition from the fleeing Puffalian armies. Trucks and Wheeled Tanks followed closely behind, transporting the infantry so they could liberate Polaris.
Slender: "Are we there yet?"
Bro: "I bet anytime soon. You can see the Harborfront Center from here - we can't be too far away."
Slender: "I'd hate to see such a city leveled because of this war..."
Bro: "They already destroyed Frostborough, and we already wrecked Ard Mhaca. They're not just gonna run away - they'll probably blow everything up before they retreat. Polaris City is their gem!"
The soldiers chatted amongst themselves, blissfully unaware that Polaris City was already being torn apart, as the allied forces moved ever closer to Polaris City.
"The allied armies are on your doorstep and what are you doing about it? Huh? NOTHING!"
The new general was getting grilled by Hans Traugott over a conference call.
New General: "What should I do, mein Vorsitzende? There are too many of them, and the locals are rising up! There is no way to win! It's thousands of us versus millions of them!"
Hans: "Then leave nothing behind for them! Blow everything up! Destroy everything Polaris loves!"
New General: "But sir, I can't-"
Hans: "Don't question me, JUST DO IT! Burn Polaris to the ground, give the allies nothing to liberate!"
New General: "Whatever."
The general ended the conference call, and two of the guards immediately loaded and pointed their guns toward their commander.
New General: "What the heck? Put your weapons down!"
Guard 1: "You are a traitor to the fatherland! How dare you disrespect our leader!?"
New General: "Calm down. Don't you understand? We can't let this city get destroyed - we'll come back and conquer it again - then what will we have to triumph over?"
Guard 2: "Hmm..."
New General: "Tell our soldiers to fight as much as we can - don't destroy the city! We have to recapture it in pristine condition. This is the fatherland's jewel, don't destroy it!"
Guards: "Yes sir!"
The news spread quickly among the Puffalian Army as to not destroy Polaris. However, this was a fatal flaw - not being willing to destroy the city meant almost certain defeat of the Puffalians.
It wasn't long at all until allied divisions started flushing into Polaris City. There was fighting nonetheless, but the Puffalians were retreating too fast to destroy anything, never-mind the orders given not to destroy anything, anyway.
Bro: "This is as easy as chasing puffles!"
Slender: "You got that right."
While allied forces swept Polaris clean of the Puffalians, Free Polarian troops parachuted into the city. They dropped in behind Puffalian lines, trapping large numbers of troops. However, they didn't surrender. They decided to massacre as many civilians as they could before they were killed. Over a million citizens were slaughtered by the end of the battle.
At the end of the day, all Puffalian forces had either escaped, been killed, or were made POW's. Polaris was liberated at last! Citizens fled out into the streets and threw themselves into a marvel of celebration. Allied soldiers were paraded around as rightful heroes, and the city fell into a drunken stupor of glee. Nathaniel B. Kratz came to Polaris City that night to claim the credit for the allied liberation. He gave the following speech the next morning, still partying hard, concerning the liberation.
"Polaris - brave! Polaris - strong! Polaris - triumphant! Polaris – FREE!!!"
Chapter Twelve: Victory
The Puffalian army was dazed and confused. They were rapidly being run off the continent, and were pushed all the way back into New Delphis - Sunset City had just been liberated, and the Puffalians were expected to be wiped off the mainland within the next few days. Bro and Slender had left Antarctica to lead their armies in an offensive to flush the final Puffalians out of the Frosian Islands and liberate the colony. That day, President Lavender arrived in the war-ravaged Sunset City to consult with generals - General Broseph also came from Freezeland to consult with Lavender and the other generals on the final offensive plans.
Lavender: "Is it time?"
Broseph: "It's time."
Lavender: "So, what's your plan?"
Broseph: "We need to invade the Puffalian homeland - kill their leader. They'll fall apart at the core and we can catch them all."
Lavender: "Well, I want to come with you."
Everyone in the room went silent and just looked at Lavender as if he was a madman: "What do you mean? You can't go there!"
Lavender: "I'm the commander in chief, mind you! I can go anywhere I want."
Broseph: "Dude, don't. You'll get killed!"
Lavender: "I can handle a gun, and I know how to drive a tank too! What more do you want?"
Broseph: "You're not a certified soldier - plus, they'd target you especially."
Lavender: "I don't care! I'm coming with you - I want revenge - and that's final!"
Broseph rolled his eyes and decided that objection wasn't the best option. He changed the topic instead.
"So, if we're ever going to succeed, we need a massive offensive."
Lavender: "As big as the Freezeland invasion?"
Broseph: "No. Everyone must be elite - the remaining soldiers there are probably very elite. Most or all of the inept would have been wiped out in the nuclear strikes. Apparently the fallout clouds look like a giant scar over Puffalia and Puffarus from space."
Lavender: "How will we invade?"
Broseph: "I suggest we airlift all our soldiers there. We've used a naval invasion too many times already - they're conducting one right now in the Frosian Islands. If we want an edge, we need to deliver death from above... as if we already haven't."
Lavender: "So we're go?"
Broseph: "We're go."
"INCOMING! BRACE YOURSELVES!"
KABOOM
Hans Traugott and everyone inside his bunker crouched on the floor as another Squarium missile impacted Triskale. All the life had been flushed out of Puffalia's surface - the only lifeblood still left was forced underground - literally.
Hans: "Gottverdammt, make them stop!"
Aide: "Mein Vorsitzende, you should be expecting Herr Olaf anytime soon."
Hans: "I know. He's going to get it when he-"
KNOCK KNOCK
"LET ME IN! IT'S BURNING OUT HERE!"
Aide: "That must be him."
One of Hans' assistants opened the bunker door to let a charred General Olaf in, while also allowing a harsh blast of heat and debris inside, too. Hans got up off the floor and went up to General Olaf's face.
Hans: "YOU ARE IN SUCH BIG TROUBLE YO-"
Sven: "Hold your breath, man. We have bigger problems. An allied invasion is coming."
Hans: "...oh... We can win, right?"
Sven: "Well, there is an old saying I like to follow."
Hans: "What's that?"
Sven: "The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun, is a truly horrible guy with a gun. – Here, take this."
Sven grabbed into his inventory and gave Hans a gun. He then added - "You'll need it."
A bunch of converted Culldrom Heavy Bombers flew through the thick fallout clouds surrounding Puffalia, escorted by Shopper space fighters and interceptors. The bombers had been converted into giant flying troop-transport units. All the troops on board were from General Broseph's 9001st Legion and the SIA Special Forces. Everyone was fitting their parachutes in preparation for the aerial invasion. General Broseph was busy consulting Lavender.
Broseph: "Have you ever parachuted before?"
Lavender: "No."
Broseph: "Oh well, I guess you can go tandem with me."
Lavender: "So, this is the big finale?"
Broseph: "I hope so. We need to wipe out Hans Traugott and General Sven Olaf."
From the other side of the aircraft's bay, a commander yelled: "Alright everyone, we're almost above Triskale! Get ready to jump!"
Broseph: "Okay prezzie, let's get you strapped in."
A few minutes later, Broseph and Lavender were ready to jump; Broseph had the parachute backpack on and he was tied to Lavender. They got in the procession of soldiers consistently plunging into the thick fallout clouds. The Dive Master was responsible for telling them when they could jump.
Dive Master: "Good luck sir, and mister president. You can jump right about..."
Lavender: "Wait-"
Dive Master: "...now!"
General Broseph immediately jumped out of the aircraft and went into a free-fall, passing many of the other troops on the way down due to his and Lavender's combined weight. Lavender was absolutely terrified, and was wailing like a baby.
"AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"
As they barreled through the fallout cloud, they got covered in soot. Broseph and Lavender eventually penetrated through the clouds to see the charred remains of the Puffalian landscape quickly approaching them.
Lavender: "PULL THE PARACHUTE! OPEN THE PARACHUTE! NOW! NOW!"
Broseph: "I was gonna do that anyway!"
Broseph opened up the parachute and both he and Lavender immediately felt whiplash, as their speed dropped dramatically. They were now gliding to the surface slowly - the coast was clear.
Lavender: "Phew...-"
RATATATATATATATATA
Suddenly, rounds of bullets flew past Lavender and Broseph. They looked down at the ground and saw Puffalian troops opening fire on them. Many parachutes were being torn to shreds and paratroopers were plunging to their deaths. Broseph pulled out his gun and began firing back at the Puffalian troops, killing them.
Broseph: "Woohoo!"
Lavender: "Crap, looks like we lost quite a few troops."
Broseph: "Oh, right... crap."
Hans' bunker was still in limbo, waiting for the next nuclear attack. However, a much more serious threat was about to present itself.
Aide: "EVERYONE! THEY'RE HERE!"
Sven: "What?"
Aide: "They're here! The allies are here! They're coming from the sky!"
Hans: "WHAT!?!?"
Sven: "I might as well go deal with them myself."
Sven grabbed an assault rifle hanging on a wall and was about to climb up and storm out of the bunker before he was stopped by the aide.
Aide: "I heard General Broseph is leading the invasion. He migh-"
Sven: "Ahh yes, my worst enemy. Don't worry, I'll finish him off and bring back his carcass to use as a rug!"
With that, he began his ascent up the stairs to the bunker exit, and off to confront his nemesis.
"Hey Broseph, that guy down there looks familiar!"
Broseph: "Who?"
Lavender pointed down to the ground, where he could see General Olaf, who had just emerged from Hans' bunker. He exclaimed: "That guy in the fancy military uniform there! Get him!"
Broseph: "That's General Olaf!"
Broseph immediately opened fire on General Olaf, and Sven was returning the fire. Both parties were dodging and attempting to fire at the same time. Luckily, Broseph didn't have to worry about the Puffalian soldiers, as they had been wiped out. Moments later, Broseph threw his parachute off and fell the last few feet onto the ground. He untied himself from Lavender, still shooting at his enemy, and they began to chase after General Olaf. Sven ran, still shooting back, and jumped into the bunker and sealed it closed. They were locked out.
"Mister president, General Broseph! We're here to help!"
Broseph and Lavender turned around and saw many Shopper soldiers there. They pushed their general and president back as they attached detonator charges to the door of the bunker.
Soldier: "Fire in three... two... one!"
BOOM
The door was blown open, and a bunch of screams could be heard deep down inside the bunker.
Soldier: "Here, have this."
A soldier handed Broseph a flamethrower, and gave Lavender a machine gun.
Broseph and Lavender: "Thanks."
Soldier: "Should we lead the way, or...?"
Lavender: "Be my guest."
The soldiers loaded their guns and descended their way down the dark stairwell. They could hear other soldiers coming from the other direction. The Shopper troops rounded the corner and came face-to-face with Puffalian soldiers, lead by General Olaf - they immediately opened fire on each other.
RATATATATATATATATATA
The sound of gunshots in such a cramped area was deafening. Within a matter of seconds, almost all the soldiers on each side were slaughtered. General Olaf had disappeared from the mess, back down to the bunker surface. There were only a few Shopper soldiers, Broseph, and Lavender left.
Broseph: "Let's wipe out these krauts once and for all, boys!"
They descended downward, into the bunker, where they saw more soldiers, Hans Traugott, and General Olaf. The enemies were finally face to face.
Broseph: "TAKE THIS, COMMIES! RAAAAAAAHHH!!!!"
Broseph didn't hesitate in unleashing the fury of his flamethrower upon the Puffalians. Hans and Sven jumped for cover, as Broseph turned the rather dull bunker into a disastrous inferno.
Sven: "Sir, open fire on them!"
Both General Olaf and Hans opened fire on Broseph and Lavender. Lavender ducked for safety, while Broseph's flamethrower was punctured.
Broseph: "CRAP!"
He threw his flamethrower off and jumped in the opposite direction, faceplanting on the floor.
BOOM
Lavender and Broseph hid behind a steel table, and opened fire on Sven and Hans, who ran along the wall, avoiding bullets while firing back.
CLICK CLICK
Lavender: "Crap, I'm outta ammo!"
Broseph: "Wait, I got an idea!"
Behind Broseph and Lavender was a Puffalian flag on a pole. The truck (top) of the pole had a sharp tip on it. Broseph grabbed a lighter and lit it on fire. He then grabbed the flagpole and charged at Hans and Sven, who were now out of ammo, trying to stab them. Sven picked up a rifle and started dueling Broseph, as Hans jumped out of the way.
Broseph: "TRY ME, KRAUT!"
Sven: "DIE, PIG!"
Both Broseph and Sven continued to flail and jockey their weapons around, however, Broseph had the obvious advantage with a bigger weapon. Sven kept jumping out of the way to avoid getting burned. As he moved back, he tripped on a dead Puffalian soldier's body and lost balance. Broseph took his chance and struck the rifle out of Sven's arms, before suddenly:
SSSCHLINK!
Broseph ran Sven through with the flagpole - right through the chest. The grand general fell on his back, with the burning flag towering out of his body. General Olaf was dead.
Broseph: "YES! VICTORY! TAKE THA-"
Lavender: "LOOK OUT!"
Broseph looked over his side to see Hans, who had just pulled the pin on a grenade and threw it Broseph's way. Broseph jumped away and hit the deck.
KABOOM
Hans got up from the floor and began to charge at Broseph with a knife. Broseph grabbed a Puffalian soldier's helmet to use as a shield. Broseph was able to knock the knife out of the dictator's frail flippers, and they engaged in hand-to-hand combat. It looked like Broseph was about to win, before Hans gave Broseph and upper-cut right into the windpipe. Broseph clutched his neck, as Hans delivered another punch to the throat.
"AAAGH!"
Broseph collapsed to the ground. Hans reached for his knife so he could stab at Broseph, as the Shopper general rolled there in agony.
From behind his table, Lavender noticed a shotgun not far from him, and crawled away from the table to get it. Hans wasn't paying attention to Lavender anymore. Hans towered over General Broseph, ready to lunge in and stab his enemy right in the chest. Broseph covered his eyes, waiting for the inevitable. Right as he raised his arm, knife in hand, ready to make the gash, a solitary shot rang out.
BANG!
Hans fell down with a bullet through his skull. The leader of Puffalia was dead - his mortal enemy - Lavender - had slayed him.
Lavender: "BOOYAH! VICTORY IS OURS! YES!"
Broseph slowly got up from the floor and wrapped his arm around Lavender. They stood there in the burning bunker, looking at the remains of their nemeses. That was it. The allies had won. Puffalia was slaughtered – the war was finally over.
Epilogue: Peace
News of Puffalia's downfall spread like wildfire. The allies had won the war! Huzzah! The allied countries threw themselves into a frenzy of celebration - fireworks went off in the big cities and the citizens danced in the streets. Allied troops returned home to their families. Lavender came back to Shops Island and was greeted as a war hero and a renowned figure for all of Antarctica. Everyone partied like there was no tomorrow - "we won!", they thought. "We finally did it! The Puffalian menace is dead!" One of the largest and most devastating conflicts in Antarctic history was finally over. It was peace at last.
THE END!