Doctor Layer Grimom

Doctor Layer Mammaluigee Grimom
Hush, my son. I'm toasting BAGELS!!
Profile
Title	MD
Gender	Male
Race	Adelie penguin
Faction	Unknown
Health	Or, is it the bagel?
Level	He has finally figured out how to use the toaster.
Status	Inventing
Location	In the family basement, doing something insane. Or, does it involve bagels?
Occupation	(Mad) Doctor
Interests	Bagels, his children, SCIENCE. In that order.
Friends	Bagels, Science, Sye, Veranda, G
Enemies	Untoasted bread
Archetype	Good

Click here to listen to Doctor Layer Grimom's theme!

Doctor Layer Mammaluigee Grimom is a brilliant- yet rather crazy -scientist and the father of both Sye and Veranda. While he is indeed a certified medic and received a legitimate doctorate from a legitimate institution, it can be easily stated that he has long drifted away from being the penguin one would entrust with their health. As his mental integrity slowly drifted away, he fell into crazy inventing. Or, was it the bagel that he fell into?

He is unnaturally obsessed with bagels.

Background

Layer hatched into a wealthy family who wanted him to be a doctor to support the family. Like the Grimoms before and after, he looked unusually dark and creepy, which led him to being an outcast as a youth. He found solace in science, and spent his days learning.

He was passionately determined to become a doctor as his family had desired. In his passionate studies, he often forgot to eat anything, too wrapped up in the knowledge within all those books. Layer's days on end without food, even if it was presented to him, weakened his body and mind. When he finally was old enough to attend medical college and study for his doctorate degree, he was scrawny and rather twitchy, a result of routine all-nighters, non-stop reading, and no eating.

Layer hated food. It was a waste of time in his eyes. Yet, his dormitory roommate saw that his crazy colleague had to have some nourishment, or he may die. This roommate tried everything from classic delicacies like pizza to items like Frys Chalet's best cooking. Nothing convinced Layer to eat.

One day, depressed and at his wit's end from trying to get his friend to eat, the colleague got up to fix himself some breakfast. He was on a shoestring budget, so he could only afford bread and water. Today, he was treating himself to a bagel.

He didn't notice Layer passionately staring at the bagel as he placed it into the toaster. However, as he shakily asked what that was, the colleague knew that he had finally reached Layer. Finally, he was going to eat!

The colleague explained the concept of toasters to him and he eagerly decided to eat something. A bagel was brought before him, and he gulped it down before the colleague could place anything on it. Then, along came toast. By the time breakfast time was finished, Layer had eaten ten bagels and a whole loaf of bread. Finally, he had eaten. The colleague was proud to have forfeited his breakfast for Layer.

Still, though, the mental damage had been done. Layer began to obsess over bagels when he wasn't working; bagels, bagels, bagels. If he had a moment of leisure, it would probably involve bagels.

Layer eventually did graduate his classes, and he did indeed take his student/residency internship/apprenticeship (though the master was thoroughly disturbed by the bagels he always had with him). He passed at an average grade, a mere B+ on the Alseef scale.

Initiated as a doctor, Doctor Layer set out for work. He was turned down because of his creepy obsession with bagels. Bagel- uhh, Layer, finally found work as an assistant in a small clinic down in East Pengolia. What with universal healthcare and budget cuts, the EP system would take anyone with a diploma.

His brief stint at the clinic was more like that of a nurse's: to simply take the patients' weight, height, reflexes, and temperature. The real duties were left to a more sane doctor. When he wasn't doing these mundane tasks, he was chomping down on bagels. The clinic provided bagels in the lounge room, but they quickly stopped after they hired Layer, because of his bagel appetite. He brought his own after that. More budget cuts followed, and Layer was the first to be laid off. Now without a job, he decided to head back home and try his hand at an old hobby: inventing.

It turns out that he wasn't half bad at inventing. Layer's items in common use today include that little tip on car antennas and the double-sized toaster oven (great for toasting bagels, of course!). Doctor Layer also invested in the writing and publication of his own patented cookbook, Layers of Bagels, where he taught readers how to make bagels from scratch, with real dough and requiring authentic homemade labor. Living off of his very cheap diet of bagels and chocolate milk, Doctor Layer managed to support the funds for his igloo and his livelihood.

After some time, Veranda also showed up in his home, and Sye six months after. While Sye bears a very strong resemblance to his father, Veranda looks nothing at all like either of them, leading to speculation that she was actually biologically conceived artificially in one of his invention attempts. It would explain why she always smells of freshly toasted bread. It may be perfume... or is it the bagel?

Involvement

Doctor Layer's offspring eat his diet: bagels and chocolate milk. For breakfast, for lunch, for dinner, it's all bagels. Having grown up entirely on bagels, they know nothing else, and thus don't really care. Layer spends his days in the igloo's cellar, inventing new things or writing new recipes for his cookbooks. What little time he isn't working, he is talking about bagels, sleeping (and dreaming of bagels), or eating bagels.

While Doctor Layer really does love his children, he is mentally incapable of focusing on too many things at once. The children of a mentally challenged, bagel-obsessed penguin, Sye and Veranda essentially raised themselves. He does try his best to connect to them, but only bagels come to mind.

Quotes

^{Some quotes ripped off of this.}

On his family

• Veranda, share with your brother. Or, was it share with the bagel?
• Veranda, if you could just step to the left...you're in the way of my toaster oven.
• Video games are good for the reflexes. Why else can Veranda snap her flipper away from a burning bagel so fast?
• Sye, has your beak grown? No? Well, if it did, that'd be marvelous. You'd have more room for bagels.
• Veranda is apathetic, yes, but take her bagels or her video games from her and she will plunge you into a Nightmare World that you will never awaken from! That's much worse than untoasted bread!
• That's my bagel...BOY! I mean boy!
• Sye, if you'd just talk about your problems to me, you'd be less insane. Want a bagel?
• Oh, my poor, crazy son. *eats fifteen bagels*
• Sye will have a great future in the cooking industry. Or science. Whatever he turns to after this silly alien nonsense.
• Veranda, did you eat the last bagel?!

On bagels

Catchphrases

• Or, was it the bagel?
• Hush, my son! I'm making BAGELS!
• Well Sye, you know what they say: all toasters toast bagels!

More bagel banter

• The key to a good bagel is toasting it for the right amount of time. Toast it too briefly, and you've got a mushy raw pocket of dough! But too long, and you're crunching away on charred bagels! How obscene!
• I have such great bagels. My kids aren't half bad, either!
• Oh, if only my son would stop trying new foods and eat REAL BAGELS!
• We were talking about bagels, right?
• The bagel.
• No, don't turn that knob! The consequences of setting a toaster oven to that temperature would be DISASTROUS!
• Don't you know that a burnt bagel is a bad bagel? Wait... is there a bad bagel?
• Jelly? Or creamed cheese? The time for choosing is at this very moment!
• Family, the eating of our bagels begins NOW!
• Bagels are a blessing from the sky programmers themselves.
• Bagels, in their own right, are a science all their own.
• Bagel?
• The bagel.

On the nutrition of bagels

• This is a REAL bagel. Not like those cheap convenient store carbs you buy.
• Bagels are a health food. They're good for your very being.
  • Bagels are bad for you?! NOT SCIENTIFICALLY POSSIBLE!!!
• Carbs are the primary source of cellular energy. That being said, bagels are carbs. Therefore, bagels are healthy.
• Bad carbs? There is no such thing! Have a bagel!
• Not satisfied? Try making bagels with whole wheat!

Other

• That's MISTER DOCTOR LAYER GRIMOM to you, sir! *wheeze*
• Well, the early Str00del spams the bagel. Or, was it the bagel?
• I'm adding a new wing into the cellar. It'll be full of toasters.
• Readers, the cooking begins NOW!
• Get that filth away from me!
• Wheat wheat wheat wheat wheat wheat wheat IT'S FUN!

Trivia

• While Layer is primarily a parody of Professor Membrane, he doubles as a parody of the lesser known, bagel-obsessed side of Mama Luigi.
• He won't admit it, but Layer isn't the greatest parent.
• He NEVER takes his bandanna off.
• He admits that he has a bagel problem when he was talking to Sye during the epic Ten Minutes to Insanity, but later in a press conference, he said this:
  • "Well, I do have a problem. Or, do I have a bagel? But I'll never give my problem up. Or, will I never give the bagel up?"
    • The press then realized he was a mad scientist.

See also

• Veranda
• Sye
• Xet
• Bagel
• Weegee